Well, been there-was that...the guy you talk with, share with, lean on when you're not strong and the one who picked you up after your fall from your last BF. I thought I found the right one and after 15 yrs she said she always had a wandering eye and left me with our beloved kids to care for. I am now divorced with custody and with no regrets.
Now that I am out there once again, I have been toying with the good guy/bad boy image or persona. When I act the bad boy, I get more attention. I am not that great looking. When I am the good guy, I am taken for granted. Go figure. One lady friend, went as far as meeting a singe guy like me with two kids as well, but he had a more bad boy image than me.
So I am confuddled as you want a guy who will make you laugh, enjoy going out or staying in and treat you nice yet the guys who look nice, talk sweet nothings and tend to leach off of you or use you mentally and/or physically it's ok as he will change or so you hope. Us 40ish guys are kinda either tired or no longer wish to play the game. It's much easier to be a bad boy than to invest all that time as your friend whom you will never see past that.