A husband walks into Victoria 's Secret to purchase a sheer nightgown for his wife.

He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price -- the more sheer, the higher the price.

Naturally, he opts for the most sheer item, pays the $500, and takes it home.

He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on, and model it for him.

Upstairs the wife thinks (she's no dummy), 'I have an idea.

It's so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on,

but I'll do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow, and keep the $500 refund for myself.'

She appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose.

The husband says, 'Good grief! You'd think for $500, they'd at least iron it!'

He never heard the shot.

Funeral on Thursday at noon - Closed coffin.

Navy SEAL's Rules:
1. Look very cool in sunglasses.
2. Kill every living thing within view.
3. Adjust speedo.
4. Check hair in mirror.


US Army Rangers Rules:
1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound rucksack while starving.
2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
3. Request permission via radio from "Higher" to perform killing.
4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving.


US Army Rules:
1. Curse bitterly when receiving operational order.
2. Make sure there is extra ammo and extra coffee.
3. Curse bitterly.
4. Curse bitterly.
5. Do not listen to 2nd LT's; it can get you killed.
6. Curse bitterly.


US Air Force Rules:
1. Have a cocktail.
2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.
3. See what's on HBO.
4. Ask "what is a gunfight?"
5. Request more funding from Congress with a "killer" Power Point presentation.
6. Wine & dine 'key' Congressmen, invite DOD & defense industry executives.
7. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets.
8. Declare the assets "strategic" and never deploy them operationally.
9. Hurry to make 13:45 tee-time.
10. Make sure the base is as far as possible from the conflict but close enough to have tax exemption.

Marine Corps Rules:
1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
2. Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough.
3. Have a plan.
4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work.
5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet ­ even your friends…
6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a "4."
7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral & diagonal preferred.)
9. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.
11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot.


US Navy Rules:
1. Go to Sea.
2. Drink Coffee.
3. Deploy Marines

Thank you ladies

I love you, I love you, that's all I can say
I love you in each and every way
from the sparkle in your eyes, and the movement in your hips
to the soft and delicate touch of your lips
the gentleness in your touch and the smile on your face
to the warmth and compassion in your embrace
there is no description of how I feel
all I know is that it is very real
I feel it when I’m with you and when your away
and all I can hope is that you will stay
always by my side through good times and in sad
I hope you love me as I do of you
because if you didn't, I’d be very blue
I love you so much, you can tell in my eyes
my tears of happiness and my gentle cry
without you in my life I’d probably not care
about people or women and would fall to despair
I love you, I love you, that's all I can say
I love you in each and every way

got it thanks

Is it morning? I have been up all night working on this dumb database...

I am new to VBA does anyone know how this SHOULD have been written... I know every IF needs an END IF and the word OR does not seem to work so how would I cover all the below... and writing an IF for each does not work.

Private Sub cmbInternalStatus_Exit(Cancel As Integer)

If cmbInternalStatus = "Approved" And cmbWebStatus = "Approved" Then
Cancel = False
If cmbInternalStatus = "Closed (Other)" And cmbWebStatus = "Closed (Other)" Then
Cancel = False
If cmbInternalStatus = "Director Review" And cmbWebStatus = "Functional Analysis" Then
Cancel = False
If cmbInternalStatus = "Disapproved" And cmbWebStatus = "Disapproved" Then
Cancel = False
If cmbInternalStatus = "Functional Analysis" And cmbWebStatus = "Functional Analysis" Then
Cancel = False
If cmbInternalStatus = "Fwd for Cmd Analysis" And cmbWebStatus = "Fwd for Cmd Analysis" Then
Cancel = False
If cmbInternalStatus = "Fwd for Decision" And cmbWebStatus = "Fwd for Decision" Then
Cancel = False
If cmbInternalStatus = "Fwd to SME" And cmbWebStatus = "Fwd to SME" Then
Cancel = False
If cmbInternalStatus = "Ineligible" And cmbWebStatus = "Ineligible" Then
Cancel = False
If cmbInternalStatus = "Pending Payment" And cmbWebStatus = "Approved" Then
Cancel = False
If cmbInternalStatus = "Staffing (TL Only)" And cmbWebStatus = "Approved" Then
Cancel = False
If cmbInternalStatus = "Team Lead Review" And cmbWebStatus = "Functional Analysis" Then
Cancel = False
If cmbInternalStatus = "Tech Review" And cmbWebStatus = "Functional Analysis" Then
Cancel = False
Else
MsgBox "Internal Status does not match Web Status, please correct.", , "Silly Analyst!"
Cancel = True
End If

End Sub

No one is from Albany... They never are.

movies... what?

-----

I love you, I love you, that's all I can say
I love you in each and every way
from the sparkle in your eyes, and the movement in your hips
to the soft and delicate touch of your lips
the gentleness in your touch and the smile on your face
to the warmth and compassion in your embrace
there is no description of how I feel
all I know is that it is very real
I feel it when I’m with you and when your away
and all I can hope is that you will stay
always by my side through good times and in sad
I hope you love me as I do of you
because if you didn't, I’d be very blue
I love you so much, you can tell in my eyes
my tears of happiness and my gentle cry
without you in my life I’d probably not care
about people or women and would fall to despair
I love you, I love you, that's all I can say
I love you in each and every way

Nothing

Marine Corps Rules:
1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
2. Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough.
3. Have a plan.
4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work.
5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet ­ even your friends…
6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a "4."
7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral & diagonal preferred.)
9. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.
11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot.


Navy SEAL's Rules:
1. Look very cool in sunglasses.
2. Kill every living thing within view.
3. Adjust speedo.
4. Check hair in mirror.


US Army Rangers Rules:
1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound rucksack while starving.
2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
3. Request permission via radio from "Higher" to perform killing.
4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving.


US Army Rules:
1. Curse bitterly when receiving operational order.
2. Make sure there is extra ammo and extra coffee.
3. Curse bitterly.
4. Curse bitterly.
5. Do not listen to 2nd LT's; it can get you killed.
6. Curse bitterly.


US Air Force Rules:
1. Have a cocktail.
2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.
3. See what's on HBO.
4. Ask "what is a gunfight?"
5. Request more funding from Congress with a "killer" Power Point presentation.
6. Wine & dine 'key' Congressmen, invite DOD & defense industry executives.
7. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets.
8. Declare the assets "strategic" and never deploy them operationally.
9. Hurry to make 13:45 tee-time.
10. Make sure the base is as far as possible from the conflict but close enough to have tax exemption.


US Navy Rules:
1. Go to Sea.
2. Drink Coffee.
3. Deploy Marines

Semper Fi

thanks you two

Every night, I dream a world of fantasies,
But I realize now you are all I can see.

I sleep in the cold, lonely night
Where dreams come alive with a world of sights.

'Cause there was something hiding behind my heart,
It is my feelings for you that can never be torn apart.

You gave me a reason to live in this lonely world,
And there would be nothing else I would want more.

For you, I'd let everything go,
And how you changed my life, I will never know.

Every time I see your face, you are even more precious to me,
And every time I am near you, I get a feeling we are meant to be.

'Cause you seem like an angel sent from above,
And I thank whatever there may be for sending you to me.

It came to me that I was falling for you ,
Because you are my dream come true.

My feelings for you could never die,
'Cause I know my heart will never lie.

And as I sleep in my sleepless mind,
You are all I can picture because you are one of a kind.

And I now know the meaning of thots that never end,
'Cause now I dream about you every night.

An Eternal Sadness:::::::::::::::::::

long time... How have you been? Call me sometime.

long time... How have you been? Call me sometime.

Thank you ladies

In a dying bed of roses Overgrown by weeds and grass, In among the briars and the thorns, Grew a lovely scarlet rose Clothed in jewels and in warmth, Smooth as velvet and scarlet as the dawn. How my heart throbbed with delight As its beauty caught my eye. How I wished I could hold it in my arms, To hold and adore, And have forevermore, Its fragrance held me captive like a charm. I just glimpsed upon this rose In the twinkling eye of time, For a moment, then its perfume passed my door. But my mind can still recall That rose's passion and its warmth, My heart is stolen by that rose in the dawn.
An Eternal Sadness:::::::::::::::::::