What about my posts made it seem like I don't like myself? I like myself very much actually. I'm kind of awesome. But I reiterate, other people can't seem to see that.

Also, i've already tried improving myself. Maybe I didn't go far enough? I took more care in my appearance, got clothes that actually fit and were of a style other than jeans-and-t-shirt, started working out, started doing more outdoors activities, tried to organize meet-ups with different groups of people, etc. I've tried being more positive, smiling more, trying to be more outgoing, etc.

I have some skills and hobbies. I pretty much stay active all the time, always trying not to be sitting at home on the computer (my former pastime). I don't know how to develop a sense of humor really (kind of thought I had one before..). As far as doing something out of character, I suppose I could try that; the only thing I have to lose is my dignity :)

The other aspect of this could be that i'm fine how I am, and it's only my self-doubt that's causing me problems. I kind of suspect it has more to do with the fact that I am sort of the anti-Alpha male and most women just aren't going to be initially attracted to a skinny short guy who looks like he's barely in his 20s. But perhaps that's just projecting?

i definitely relate to the OP, except now that i think about it, there is one time i don't mind being social. if i'm in an environment where i know i'm expected to talk to total strangers, i'm usually okay. so when i'm traveling, or meeting a group of people that are part of some meet-up of some kind, i know they're all here for the same thing as me so it's easier to just strike up conversation. maybe the trick is to find the common link between yourself and the people immediately around you and ask questions about that? not sure

Thank you for the replies. I've heard this advice before... "just be yourself". I'm sure it's very useful advice for most people, except for one thing. I am being myself! I dress how I like, I don't put on any kind of act, I say what I think and I pretty much just 'live' without second-guessing. I still can't meet anybody, heh.

I think part of it's probably that I can be pretty shy and I don't really approach people I don't know. I feel socially retarded, like I have no way to know if this stranger even wants me to chit-chat with them (because I don't know them, so I don't know anything to actually talk about except mindless stuff). Then online pretty much all of my messages go ignored (of course with 90% of the people on here not putting any useful info in their profile at all, it's really hard to start a conversation worth having anyway). I feel like i'm trying to drive a car when I don't know how to work the gas pedal.

don't know, there's only us fake men here. i'm really a zebra in a man-skin suit.

So i'm not sure what happened to me. After my last real relationship 2+ years ago, I haven't been able to meet anybody. I know most people say what they're looking for is "confidence" but i'm afraid i've lost all of mine. I have no idea how to just 'create' confidence in myself... I think i've just lost hope that i'll meet somebody. The crazy thing is, I *know* i'm a great guy, I know i'm worth someone spending their time with.... but nobody else knows that, heh. I don't know where to begin.

How do you change your whole view around? How do you 'get' confidence?

I am behind the times. Everything I listen to is moldy. Give me some new tunes!!

However, some rules:

1. It hasn't been played on any mass-market radio like Clear Channel.
(I know some really cool little radio stations play different things)

2. Each band you suggest should have a different sound than the last.
Try to mix up the genres too.

3. I have to be able to get a demo, clip, or somehow get it online for free.
Sorry, I just don't want to pay for something I don't know if I like.

4. No covers.

5. Try to make it a different genre or sound from the post above you.

6. Extra points if they're currently touring so I can go see them if I like them.

If you don't know much new music, ask your friends and family for suggestions and come back with them. You'll be giving these tired ears some new life! Thanks!!!

The Specials - Rudi, A Message To You

darn, i didn't think i could have done permanent damage... today it stopped being a dull pain and started being a sharp pain. i think i will consult a physician...

my $0.02: rib rippers.

you lay on your side (left, then right) and bend your legs in slightly and try to straighten your back. now while laying on your side, turn your body so your face is pointing at the ceiling and your shoulder blades are flat on the ground. get a good-sized weight (10lbs?) and grasp it lengthwise, holding it above your chest (don't let it rest). now crunch. you want your shoulder blades off the ground and keep your core tight. do this in sets of 20 or 30.

if you're doing it right, it should feel like someone's sticking a knife in your ribs . but do it at least four times a week, 2 reps of 30, combined with regular cardio and you'll see those handles shrink away.

as far as cardio not being fun, i found doing it in a group/class setting was much more enjoyable. check out local gyms near you and see if they have a small cardio kickboxing/conditioning class. good luck!

my right quad always hurts. even without lunges it's sore after i do anything strenuous involving them; knees, kicks, squats, running, etc. i stretch all the time and try to drink enough water (though don't always). my left quad almost never hurts.

what's going on here? am i using the right more than the left without realizing it? is there some way i can get it back into "normal" shape and not have it hurt all the time? hope someone can fix me, i wanna get out there and do more

thanks everyone for your feedback :)

beating up women is one of the great joys of life.

......

IN A VIDEO GAME I MEAN.




DX




srsly though, its fun when you can do something with your SO, vid games are one easy way to do that. i love a challenge so when they can beat me it makes it that much more fun =)

i'm curious what you all think are the languages i should be learning that will be heavily used for general-purpose programming in the next 5 or 10 years. python is incredibly useful and pretty easy to pick up, but i can't see a big company hiring 30 python programmers to develop some enterprise application in an interpreted language. are Java, C++ and C# really the only contenders? and how often do you think i should give myself pet projects to keep brushed up?

is there anything about my profile that i forgot to include, or is my second paragraph off-putting? (meant as a joke, but you never know)

thanks!