A woman brought a very limp duck into a Veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope. And listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away.

"The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead, replied the vet.
"How can you be so sure,?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog on the head and took it, out of the room.

A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck. "The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20. But with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150."

boiling in a pot. One egg says to the other "wanna see my crack?" The other egg says "Quit teasing me, I'm not even hard yet"

lol, how the heck you been shoes?

winx, you know I am on the fast route out, but its ok, I got to talk to friends :)

yup.......nice guys finish first. Good thing I am an azz

goodbye

That is just wrong on so many levels lol

Sorry I don't know you, but I do know the CherBear

Some men in a pickup truck drove to a lumberyard. One of the men walked into the office and said, "We need some four-by-twos."

The clerk asked, "You mean two-by-fours, don't you?"

The man said, "I'll go check," and went back to the truck.

He returned shortly and said, "Yeah, I meant two-by-four."

"All right. How long do you need them?"

The customer paused for a moment and said, "I'd better go check."

After a while, he returned to the office and said, "A long time. We're gonna build a house."

how about a flower instead?

Sure. You should put those booty pics back up though cause yours is fine

mine is when I can get a good tight woman to exfoliate it for me. SHines really good afterwards ;)

Bye BG, it was good to talk to you again as well

http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a260/chaosrob/IMG_1257.jpg

the shiney one in the middle. You should see my collection now BG

Hmm, I missed ms bear

nah, that was my; " I was really playing with my new toy but didn't want to tell anyone whistle".

well I can tell you, while looking at the new stadium out my window, texas is a peach ;). I might even go to cowboys tonight

I'm back, had to check the weather *whistles*

let me look......sexay