Thank you Lily

You people do realize that had I been LESS observant we could have hooked up and it STILL would not have been my fault. Instead I ASKED questions.

Excuse me if I try to TRUST people until I have a reason not to. I did NOT speak to him much at ALL until today. He winked, waved, starred me down even for 3 weeks. Excuse me for thinking that maybe somebody might like to get to know me. He could have said he was married when I GAVE him that number, instead of calling me last night to try and set up a date. I told him "lets talk about it later b/c I have my nephew here". I don't like my nephew knowing ANYTHING about ANYONE unless I know it will be anything serious. I did NOT notice his ring until this morning. His got a HUGE hand, the ring is a very thin gold band almost the color of his finger. Had it not been for the lighting reflecting off of it at work I STILL would not have noticed. He and I work in different parts of the building, its not like I got the chance to stare at his hand before today. We work in telefundraising, most of the time I'm busy working not checking men for wedding rings. Why is it I'm to blame in this? I'M not the MARRIED one trying to hook up with people! I do not have the responsibility to his wife, HE DOES. Luckily for her I'm not the type to try and be with anyone else's significant other, I have way too much respect for it.

No. They should flirt with their WIVES, and not try to bring some innocent into the mix or hurt someone.

One more question, why am I all of a sudden the bad guy? LOL, I did NOTHING wrong. I could NOT have known he was married without someone telling me. I even checked to make sure I wasn't jumping to conclusions when I saw the ring on his hand.

The kind of men I attract, they always seem to be sleezy, married, or a strong mix of both.

I said he flirted with me for weeks, didn't say I talked to him much. I said he and I hadn't even talked all that much til this morning. He said "I want to come hang out with you, when will you have some alone time?" Trust me, the way he said it meant he was interested in more than friendship. And no, he said nothing when I confronted him.

Haha, I think callin him out in front of everyone who was out smoking at the time was pretty direct.

BAH! LOL, he didn't get THAT far with it.

I did NOT say that every man lied, I just said this guy did and well... several others I've come in contact with. Usually doesn't last long though, I have a way with knowing when someone's lying and call them out on it immediately.

Lying by omission is STILL LYING, especially when you're married with 3 kids tryin to hit on the new hottie at work.

To STOP trying to deceive me?? LOL, one day they will realize that it does NOT work on me to lie. There was this guy at work who seemed really nice and had been flirting with me for WEEKS now. Well, I finally gave him my number yesterday so we could get to know one another. Now, I hadn't spoken to him a whole lot until today. Well, we spoke this morning before work just long enough for him to walk away and me catch a glimpse at his left ring finger. Well, thats the FIRST thing I look at when I speak to a man...lol. Apparently he wasn't going to mention that he was married. At lunch, I went to a lady I have known for years since she's his "desk neighbor" and asked if he was married. She confirmed what I already figured, so outside at lunch I lifted up his left hand and said "when were you going to ask your wife if it was alright that we hung out??" He shut up fast...

GAH! LOL, I know not EVERY man is like this, but it sure does p!$$ ya off when they do that crap!

"Members of both sexes lie, not all of either one. "
What part of that isn't clear? I didn't say all of either one lied!!

I'm no longer going to defend my very well intentioned post. Most people get the drift, you're the only one who seems to have some type of issue with it.

Fibbing to suprise someone and lying to outright deceive them are two completely different stories. The thing is, the average person is a pretty good judge of when someone's lying. I think they'd rather "catch" someone lying about a party or engagement then to find them cheating or doing anything else in the line of betrayal.

ONLY drama queens do that. Most women are smart enough to either NOT ask at all, or really want a second opinion if they do.

You just like picking arguments...lol. That would be a completely different story than someone lying to be a jerk.

First of all, if you truely love a woman you will not see her as fat period. Secondly you little trouble maker...lol, its okay to say "Not fat, it just doesn't flatter your beautiful body as much as that other one you had in your hand" or point out one that does flatter her more.

Members of both sexes lie, not all of either one.

Men lie mostly about their age, relationship status, height, intentions, shoe size, and penis size.

Women typically lie about age, weight(and usually only because they are self conscious about it), and sometimes how many sex partners they've had.

Lies are lies, none are good. Everyone who lies does it for their own reasons. I am not stating that anyone's reasons are excuses, but reasons ARE normally different. Some people lie solely to manipulate others and be selfish. Some people lie to protect themselves from judgment. Some people lie because they are just straight up compulsive liars and don't know the difference anymore between the truth and a lie. Before anyone complains, yes I do know that women lie about more than what I listed.

A little advice to all. Not everyone is going to lie to you and deceive you. Take each person as an individual and don't assume they are going to be just like the last @sshole who lied to you. Trust like you've never been hurt, but keep your eyes open when things look fishy. One day someone will surprise you by not lying and being a true person towards you. That day you will find love. We all have to stop automatically distrusting everyone because of past experience. Its not good for us. Let those past pains stay where they belong and do not bring them into a new relationship. If you stay in yesterday, tomorrow will pass you by.

I don't want anyone to mistake what I said, I LOVE kids to no end. I also would gladly date a man with children. Like I said though, its really hard to do that without baby mama drama. I like to go into a relationship with everything in the past staying where it belongs. You can't keep a baby mama in the past. If they dont have kids its much easier for me to ignore the fact they've ever been with anyone else...lol. I like relationships to be blank slates, treat it as its a first for both. Guys tend to appreciate that...lol.