Good morning, I am just trying to make these Topics fun.. To shake them up some.. to Show the playful side of me.

Well! It was like this, One day while I was at work or home ect....?
I got this call from my kids school? I was shocked to here what they had to say about my child?

What did your Teacher, Principles, or nurse Tell you????

have fun..........????????

This post is for your deepest feelings and emotions: Poor out your soul and your Wisdom! BE the future Realist Knowing the truth and yet being blinded: How do you see Internet relationships? How do you here people talking about there memories? Good or Bad????

What is your most fondest memories that will last a life time Good or bad? Then add this to your reason you don't have someone in your life?


I am such a morning person: (memories)- When i was younger my father would wake me up at 4am to go to work with him on the construction site. It was the best time ever, He just loved spending time with his little girl. I use to love running up and down the 2 or 3 story homes, I use to love walking on the open beams. Using a hammer to see how many times it would take to get the nail in the wood.. IT took my dad.. ONE> TIME>>>> it took me ????? more then i can count...
Such fond memories......

Is there a differences between RE-MEMORIZING YOUR MEMORIES and Living your memories....

When a person talks about themselves, the do it to give a part of themselves to someone so the other person can RELATE to them. We do it so they can GET TO KNOW US and to SHARE a part of are life.

We live in such a world now a days of judgment and even the past can bite you in the butt. To Tell a strange person who you are, what your about, were you came from and the journey on it, to get you were you are today! Right now! it took all of this to make the person you are!

so to share this with someone tells them, I VALUE YOU... But most do not see it that way, they feel you live in the past, and tell you to get out of the past...

What is the differences between taking pictures putting them in a photo album. and re looking at them ever few years or months..

Here is the differences.

it is every few years...

if you are "talking still" about the anger and the pain that hurt you 25yrs ago, [then your living in the past]... If you can not seem to better yourself, your in the past. if you hate your job, hate your world and no one can deal with you because all you do is talk about who hurt you, who destroyed you and who was not there for you! Then your in the past.

NOW>>> the differences is this.... When you talk about the Past in a state of Re-remembrance, when you share a part of HISTORY....... The key>>>>> with someone when it is funny, or humorist, when it is a Good memories.. then it is in the right context.

so we can only be positive in the past, we are never to be negative.

So for all humans to be them self, to be loved and adored, to be adored and to have new and old friends, these people only talk about the GOOD, GREAT, FUN, HUMORISTS, THE SILLY, AND CUTE... Memories.

I got it.. and that was not clinical.. it is the truth.....

People don't like harsh mean and rude people, they don't like to hear all the problems, there is enough of that in the world. What we want to hear is the Good times. Like a Good movie that makes us laugh you remember it for ever, but a bad movie that makes you cry and makes you feel bad about yourself. This movie never hits the 1# charts.... NOW>>>> if it scares the hell out of us, then and only then dose it become famous??? figure that one out..

So we live on Fear... we want to be scared, we want to have the UNKNOWN....

THAT IS THE KEY... it was not Fear itself.. IT is the UNKNOWN.. WE ARE SCARED OF... WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT.

I never really understood the passage in the bible, be fearful of God! Why ???? Because if he is in the image of mankind, then i am to be Fearful of Mankind, my parents, friends, my children, the world at large.

NO>>>>> Be fearful of God! THE UNKNOWN! BECAUSE YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT "HE WILL DO NEXT"...... YOU can never see it coming...."until it happens" you never see death or love or the joy of a child until it happends, YOU can assume, you can analyze it too death until you make yourself crazy.. but in the end... The UNKNOWN! is the Fear we have over are self's.

As for me my fear.... Is To be alone... Funny " I was raised as a ONLY CHILD ALONE BY MYSELF!..Funny though even if i have God, and my children, and my parents... I have only internet friends, but I have no one in my life to live my life with to love every night to share my world with.

I can now understand why everyone is so scared.. We want a Key to a Humans Heart and soul. We want to give a Key to a humans heart and soul. But when no one wants your KEY>>> your (MEMORIES/ DREAMS/ ASPIRATIONS). Your life and family's life, your friends and your career.... Then What are we seeking then.

the unknown.. YOU wonder why women want what they call the (bad boys/girls)? it is because they are UNPREDICTABLE! We do not feel safe with them an at the same time we have a lot of fun, yet they hurt your heart and soul every time they turn your world up side down and destroy you as a human... but it was fun, it was crazy while it lasted.

But some people want the safe ride, the predictable people, the ones that are called (nerds) the workaholics of this country who care about human rights, who care about family and honor, who care about the other persons feelings and emotions.

And yet we want both. We want ONE person in are life to be wild and crazy at times and then Predictable at times so we can have that "SAFE" environment for are kids and family.

My out come!. We are fearful of Dieing, we are fearful of getting old and not living are life. We are fearful that if we love anyone they will be taken away forever so why? Ever love anyone at all.

Because! of one thing.. THE UNKNOWN! you DON'T KNOW IF YOU HAVE ONE DAY... or a hundred days or just a month.

What counts is you live that one day at a time with this person, get to know them inside and out, that means everything about them not just what you chose to hear... but the real them.

This is were my world is at. NO one wants to know ME>>>> they love my looks, they love what i have to offer them, but they do not ever want to know my soul. Who? I am inside of this body, what? i think and feel. What? my dreams are and what? I see is a future for the life i live. NO one! wants the day in and day out life, they only want the Fun, and Excitement of the UNKNOWN.. for a moment when it is over, they move on, and go to the next fascinating person. Leaving a broken heart and family, friends behind.

I say! "To hell with all of that", why not just be "CONTENT"... with the person you fell so madly in love with when you heard there heart, throw away the looks and the size, and the career, the past, the words and actions.. but! "hear".... "the person inside calling out too you" "telling you how much they want to be with you"....and yet you only want...???? nothing in return but a good time "RIGHT".....???

So what is dating for then.. a Good night stand....I have not had a relationship in almost 3yrs. because I will not feed into the UNKNOWN.. because I believe love is for ever not just a day, or week, or month but a life time of memories... To last.. while you walk on this earth "hand and hand"..

Did you and your children play board games, cards ect....

What was your one special night spent with your entire family, once a week or month.????

My family would put a card table up in the corner, and because we were all on different hours..... Ages 16-17.... at the time.

[but you chose your own children ages]...... [and time period].

anyway, we would put up Monopoly, and for 2 or 3 weeks we would come into the house see who is next?, roll the dice! make are move! and then head off to finish homework, or get ready to go to work.. ect.

It was so much fun.. However.. "MOM" (me).. always Won.....DA! I WAS THE BREAD WINNER... I BOUGHT PROPERTY... Too bad i did not do this in real life i would of been rich... LOL haa haa...

I posted a Picture of me with my Died hair in 2007, I had more complements ever in my life. EVERYONE... loved it......

However, it took almost 2 yrs to get the black out, it destroyed my hair, and thinned it on top now i have a small bald spot. Nothing i do will re grow it back.. The black die was so harsh, Since then i have not re died it.. So now i get the old granny look with long sliver streaks showing who Won this Fight... LOL and it was not ME>>>> haa ha...

I do miss it but the Wal*mart brand after 30yrs of dieing my hair has cause damage... YOU pay for Cheep ness...

YOU can pay $50 to $80.00 and get it down professionally.. and have them responsible for the bad hair die.. LOL and sue there butts..

OR..

YOU can pay $7.95 or $12.95 at walmart and pray your hair is still there the next time... Ha ha ha..

I went to a professional to make my hair Auburn red, it turned out being Orange for 3 months.. I was not happy.. so i never trusted them again..

The end of my long a sssss story...

P>S> this was at there home not at the daycare... it was later that night and the oldest was in her room cutting paper, her 4yr old sister came in grabbed her hair and said, cut this i dont like my hair. Then she ran down stairs to her mother, and the mother yelled out the oldest name, She got scared so she cut her hair so she would not get into trouble. Well in the end. neither of them got in trouble...

However the next day the youngest learned no matter what she dose she will not get punished so after mom put everyone to sleep, she walked out of the house at 9:30 and walked over in the dark to her grandmothers house about a block away. Remember she is only 4 yrs old.

The next day, the girls told me, that they can do what ever they want that mom will never punish them.. The end...

OK you people are going to hate me! That is not a understatement. I am dyslexic and miss spell words all the time. I can not write a sentence but a fragmatic-->(can't find the word for this one) bunch of words. That are twisted around and you have to jump backwards to figure out what I just said.. To find the comma's and the "Dalmatians" -[!].. haa haa add in a few "I told you so" that never go my way... and Don't forget the Periods that my ring finer likes to add in 3's and 4's.... for some reason.

But other then be a pre-school teacher What I have to teach, ABC's and 123, Red, green and purple. Add in Tie your shoes and pic up your toy's. And all i do is talk about Kids, day in and day out...

So if you read any of sillyatheart3 post/ or Topic.. Run like hell and close your eyes.. For you will be so confused it is not worth it in the end...

Have a fun and laughing day.. dont let words control you.. play with them..... Like i do..

aoec Look the same
bpqdhk look the same
1lihk can look the same
mnuvwxz will look the same

1-l
2-s
3-E
4-H
5-G
6-hbd
7-TL
8-S
9-Pbdq

Point made. NO computer keyboard can help spell check when you still can not figure out the letters, it will give you at least 5 examples and then you have to chose and pick which one could it be.

Rat
Pat
Cat
bat
sat
nat
Rot
pot
Cot
Bot
Sot
not
Ral
PaL
ceR

Point made..... Sorry if i ever miss spell a word.. Haa haa haa..

OO PS>>> CAPS ARE EASIER TO UNDERSTAND THEN?
oo ps>>> caps are easier to understand then?

I'm a smart *** today!

I run a day care, and the 5 yr old just cut her sisters hair who was 4 yrs old, this week and mom flipped out, she was going to shave her daughters hair but could not get the shaver to work, and well never did anything about it. come to find out, for the last 3 weeks she has been talking about cutting her twin sons hair?????? funny what children hear and what they will do with that information.?????

Anyway, have you ever had your child cut her siblings hair, or someone in schools.

My daughter cut all her dolls hair off.. My son tried to cut his sisters hair.. but i took a leep in the air to grab those scissors... All i could think about was ... It took me for ever to grow her hair long... Don't you dare touch it.

LOL.... As for me. I'm too old to remember..... LOL..

My Son went threw this state at 20yrs old NO joking late bloomers.. LOL

wash in dies: Well Blue he wanted his hair blue like some Nintendo game! Final Fantasy. Then that went to Red, then Green, That was a pissy color.. Haa haa.. then Sliver... and the funny part later his hair was a sunset color so many dies faded into each other... it was bright Orange at the end.. Chop chop...... were a beanie hat.

My daughter has the most beautiful Auburn hair.. God for bid if mom ever found out I would do ballistic on her... MOM found out she streaked her hair Purple... Though mom would miss this one.. it was only a small strand... NOPE>>> I FLIPPED OUT WENT UNGLUED... SPAZZED OUT...

THEN I PULLED MYSELF TOGETHER..

So i went and Died my hair.. every color there was....NEVER USE BLACK IT WILL DESTROY YOUR BEAUTIFUL HAIR... AND THIN IT... it took 2 yrs for it to come out. I could not even strip the color for i had Red, Brown, blond, Blue Black, Coffee, ect. the list is long...

So My daughter found out maybe I wont do this again....

as for my son.. Lets say... he grew out of that stage...

Me I will keep my Gray i Earned it after all of this... LOL

How did you teach your child to drive and at what age?

My kids were only in the 5 and 6th grade when i taught them. At that time we were living in Oregon and the roads are dirt... nothing really around.. just long *** roads...... that go on for ever an ever.

Well, I had a stick shift. That was fun.

OK put Daughter in seat, God help me? NO>> get daughter out of car.. **** in the trunk you are never driving again...... it was a hatch back open window people.........

OK put Son in seat. OK this is not bad... O my God watch out for that bump.... as i hit my head on the Roof as he pushes the gas peddle faster... SLOW THE HELL DOWN OR I WILLLLLLLLL////???????ejkjoiejroiwej

ok take Son out of car strap him to the hood.. JOKING>>>> i can dream cant I...

Next try.. Next day... lets try this again... OK SON HITS TREE BACKWARDS... That is what I get for telling him i was a pro at reverse driving.

next try.. Daughter hits dip as the brakes slame up into the window... OOOWWWWOOOOOOOOWWWWW child.

As I am screaming at this time..... What the heck is wrong with you kids..

When my mother taught me i was only 12yrs old, she put me in her Saber tooth checkered green Maverick....in Palm Spring, it was a Auto matic. No sweat! I drove like a pro..... how ever the other girl who was 3 yrs old.. Lets say Lisa should never get her license. EVER.. down in the ditch we go.. up the bank, on the other side of the rode.. Gee my mom had NERVES OF STEEL......

oK last of least it took for ever to teach my kids. 2001, kids 18 and 19teen. they did not want to drive at 15 and 16 they said they were not ready and did not feel kids at this age are responsible enough to have this much stress on them>> LLOOOLLL

So i hired.... out side hlep for $198.00 for 3 classes so my kids could get driver licenses... LOL..

OO did i mention with in a few months my daughter crashed my car, then my son crashed my next car, and then my daughter, then my son. and Now they own there own cars.... then my daughter then my son... ****..........my insurance is 4k a year... point made.

The end. God help me with my grandchild who is only 3.. hee hee hee

\THE TELEPHONE BOOK IS LOOKING PRETTY GOOD... The white pages:

Hello! YOU don't know me but i have been on dating sites: Are you single, married or with child. Great
If you had a chance to date a wonderful amazing person would you do it? Great. and last question, Are you ready to date that amazing person know? YES>>. great what time can i pick you up for dinner so we can start a life time commitment relationship???????? CLICK....

WHAT A WHACK O... Hay honny! I just got the strangest call in my life.

NOW>>> people did you just miss this.... The first Question was! ARE YOU SINGLE....... hAAA HAA HAA..

Sorry everyone had to just break the ice and make everyone laugh for a while........ Julie

Every day of my life! Who wants a house full of kids every day? or Adult kids in the house every day. When you have your Adult kids and grandchild live with you 24/24 and you are always with them???? And run a daycare out of your house on top of that????

NOPE>>>> your not going to be dating... If you are??? I want to know were you found this person, what state, what city because it is not from OKLAHOMA!.....

Now about my Daughter, My daughters Real first job, with paycheck and all.. was at the Movie Theater, while going full time to colelge she was 18teen yrs old. She had the job for 3 yrs, then got a job at the college being a janitor worked there for 3 more years, during this time she was also paid to be a lab assistance which she did for the 3 yrs also.

Then she was offered a job at the Water treatment there is only 3 in the entire Oklahoma state. She worked there for a year, part time/ college full time.. Then when she finished college she started in May working full time this year, and she loves it. Her Boss just put her on Salary and she is making 28k a year. He has told her that he is moving up in the company and he wants her to take his place. So he is training her for other jobs in the business..

Because of my daughters skills they are making a lot more money for she is certified in those areas. So they can take in more tests. She is also trying to certified other employees so they can take her place if needed and be a asset to the company and some have worked there for over 9 yrs... And she has passed all of them.

I am glad my daughter listened to me and strives to be the best she can be. Even If i am a over achiever and made a child who is a over achiever. Sometimes it is a good trait to have.

She started off to be a Vet then changed to be Zoologist but found out she was allergic to animals.. NO JOKING>>>> so has chose to go the scientist departments working with Cells, and Genes, ect.. microbiologist stuff......

Anyway she loves her job...

We just hope we can get her brother back on track! With love and devotion, I think we can.....

I was thinking last night, after my son made a comment. He said! Mom it is hard to go from making $6.00 a hour on your real first job, to then making $10.00 a hour to only have to go back to work for $6.55 and having H.S. kids as your boss....

My sons first Real Job. on his own. with out the parents help or influence. My Son got a job when he was 18teen at a Restaurant Joseph's dinner house, He washed dishes, moped floors and worked his way up to the bakery making bread and soups. But his attitude prevented him from keeping the job. NO one could deal with his cocky personality.

His second job, Gas station cashier, he loved this job, until he got set up! and well he did not pass the test! he did not check the minors ID>>> and got fired.... this is when he started to drink, and I was afraid he was going to smoke cigs.. because he was near them, he had to look at them all day and night. My fear was stupid cigs.... Gee what was i thinking.. But they also sold Alcohol. That was the down fall.

His third job again was a Gas station and he loved it but the Manager promised him the world and gave the job to a older man. So my son Quit.

He has spent up to 8 months at times with out jobs.. not even using unemployment because unless your fired no money. This state is a no fault state so they just stop giving you hours and weed you out. Until you can not service and have to leave and never come back.

Know he is working in a food store, He gets no discounts on anything he said. He makes $6.55 but in a few days the State wage goes up! a few pennies. lol

As for me. My first Real job I was 16teen yrs old, made $2.10 hr working in a factory being the Friday Girl, I did everything, Shipping and Receiving, Kardex, filing, separating parts and organizing, bathrooms, office work, answering phones.

I had a wonderful night with my Son's visit, he bought ribs, you can read my Profile for the rest of the information.

It was nothing like I had worked up self up to believe. Because last time my son came he started a 9 hr debate and it lasted until 5am I was so tired the next day. That was back on April 12th, he took over my daughters birthday and made it all about him. Telling me he was leaving to move back with his Father. But it was in the end just a cry out! asking for help. Not knowing what to do anymore. But his father did not want him there so he said here. Thank God he did!

Now, this week he will be moving his stuff in the house. To have a new beginning.

I can see from all of you, I have a lot of work to do ON ME!.. Thank you for all your advice, This is one women who learns from her mistakes.

Thank you... I did the post [My 23yr old son is coming home at my Request!]

Everyone gave me great advice, then i said what i was doing.. then all of a sudden I was my own post.

I was talking more then i was Listening... I have to stop that.. LOL

I have learned a lot from a few people on here and they have been very forward with me.

I wrote controlling because I was controlling my own post. Trying to jusify everything i was doing and saying and thinking.. Wrong move.

So this time i am reading.. and thinking.. then leaving it at that.

To everyone that was giving me advice, I am sorry! Sometimes you think one has to justify there actions and yet. they just need to listen and learn, accept others expressions. I did not do that. I was so concerned in doing everything so perfectly that I did not see what you all was trying to say too me and support me.

I am a control freak, I can see that, I have to control even my own form. I have so much responsibility, that I end up blaming anyone that helps me! Because I am not taking responsibility for my own personal actions.. I do not look at mine but others.

Someone said it best. SHUT UP AND LISTEN AND THEN YOU CAN HEAR!

THANK YOU ALL OF YOU........ PLEASE NOTE, i AM TRYING!

DON'T LEAVE ME NOW WHEN I NEED YOU THE MOST IN MY LIFE!

single fathers do have it rough, I have many of them in my childcare center. I hear the storys all the time that he can not date anyone because no one wants to be the childs mommy...

The child already has a mother, regardless if the mother took off and left the child with the father. At least it shows the father is being Responsibule, YOU know that you will always be taken care of, you know he will always cary a good job, YOU also know that he can love... LOVE>.. because if he can raise his child and think that much of his self.... to do this. Then This single father is able to love from his heart and soul.

I have never met a single father yet in 28yrs of taking care of kids that dose not want the best for his child.

Maybe someday women will stop going for the Jerks that abandon them, who abused them and disregard them as women.. And start dating real men who care enough about family.

and this goes for Women also, I have been a single parent for over 12yrs and people do not want to date a women with kids.

God bless all us parents we deserve to be loved just like any single person dose... We are single..... the only diffrents is this... We take care of other people not just areselfs.

flixxy.com/bear-animal-nature-film.htm

I think this says it all. I have always said, I must have been a Bear in another life. It fits my personality. I defend My child no matter what.

But the questions sits... The bear, dose not have a mind to blame the Cougar for the rest of its life.

That is were I as a human Have to stop, Blaming the world, society, the family and friends. His father.

Dose anyone have advice, all the counseling only allows you to express your feelings, Every one says... Stop blaming..

Ok.. then HOW>>>> How do i Learn to Re word my words... with out blame..

I was thinking today! everyone I blame in my life for my own situation..

YES, i am responsible then for my child's life, for it was my Responsibility to have left his father years ago instead of staying in a broken relation ship+ that i new had ended with in the first 3year of the marriage, but i did not, My mother told me to stay in there. I wanted to leave. and year after year.. I hated being married to this man. I hated him for having a Threesome while i was at work.. and it crushed me when he told me the truth, instead of Forgiving him for a mistake he had made, I punished him for it.

and by the time i got over it, I had already destroyed the family. With a coped attitude..

Then I became so sick in my heart year after year, knowing he was cheating on me, and the kids watching it and telling me... And I let it go on. again because everyone said. stay married for the kids. OK 26yrs later i did that.. Now the kids Hate... Regret... and Blame as i do.... So what did i teach them..

HOW to hate there father, how to punish others, how to punish yourself if anything.. I dont want to be happy someone told me for if i did, i would, i want the world to know my misery so i feel connected to SOMEONE... but in the end...

I think i am helping others by telling my story... but instead. I have been told i am complaining, i am whining, I am unforgiving.

I think there all right. My son Drinks yes! it is his choice and I can not do anything about it, I am powerless...

I know that I am the person that Changes, when I know there is something wrong with me. I change it.. And his Father refused to change. So my son learns.... What..... Change is bad....

But maybe thee is hope, if everyone can help me change, MY words, actions, Tell me how to be happy, I cant find the happiness even with everything i have, even with everything i do for others..

there is nothing for just me.... And it is always.. boo hoo when me. when is it my time to be happy.. But then God comes in and adds one more on my shoulder.....I am sure he is trying to make me strong enough to handle it all when I do become on my own at 50?yrs old...

I cant even think of this.. OMG>>> 50yrs old and it will be the first time since i was 18teen and kicked out of the house. I could not make it then, how will I at 50 make it.

I have never kept a job, for i was the in home mother, all i do is watch kids all day and night... And I do not want this for my future.. I am getting to old taking care of everyone.

If i do not have a direction. then how could i have given my son a direction. I have dreams.. but I don't do anything with them, I start them don't get me wrong but I never finish them. I think i need someone to help me, to be with me, to be a part of it.

I cant seem to find ME>>>>>> in anything I do.. I do everything for everyone else....

So how can I expect my son to be his best, if I can not even be my best or do what I want to be.....

??? I have a lot to think about... I thank all of you... I know you all think i have the answers.. NO>>> i have a written Plan on paper and in my mind... but The event has not happened, I do not know what it is going to be like, maybe I just make a big thing out of nothing because Fear itself is only Fear.... the UN Known... is the most scariest thing to me.. The initiation of it all... scares me the most.....

Thank you all so much, Please note i am still trying to learn how to reply? lol

To earthlytaurse76, Thank you.. I am also a Taurus62. LOL I will pray for your son and "wish him home with his mother".... Love you all! so much, I can not express how much my heart is filled of gratitude for everyone today!

YOU have made a very good judgment! thank you!

1. Alcoholic, I come from a long family, I quit in 1994 for my daughter, and son. The "Dare Program", taught my daughter in school to not do it. She attended many classes while she was only in the 6th grade. However we moved before my son could take the classes.

I Have even dated recovered alcoholics and gone to the meetings many times on both side, so I do understand the out come of this. We have a wonderful AA, here in Stillwater that i have asked my Son to attend and I will go with him for support if he would like, He has agreed so far.

His father would not give up smoking even when are kids developed asthma, or anything else. I am hopping or wishing that my son since i do not know him any longer will have the ability to understand we are there for him if nothing else if he decides to do this. however i do have a back up plan which is the counseling i have set up for him to attend if he is going to live here???? I know he will go to this at least.

2. I can see what you mean about when I said "I will take responsibility for my son's actions? I think what I meant is that there are so many parents that leave there kids out on the streets like my parents did giving the kid no Choices but what they really have to do to survive.

By taking Responsibility for my child, who i had, who i gave life too. I feel that since my child is crying out for help that I feel it is my responsibility to help him as much as i can. So many parents refuse to help there child, But my mother always told me one thing.

Do what ever you can for your child no matter what because later in life they will understand it once they have kids and a family, then they will see what you went through and that is when they will be grateful you are there parent. If you give them kindness when they need it the most, then when your a senior they will give you respect. How you treat your children, is how they later will treat you. Have mercy on them so they can have mercy on others.

I know that My daughter now appreciates me so much, she spoil's me and so dose her husband. Because they can see how much I am being there for them. How much Responsibility I take to care for my grandchild. Most grandparents would not even attempt what i am doing. And some would love to but there kids lost faith in them years ago.

But I see what you mean! Even though my son is going to have to work 1 1/2 jobs at least to pay off his bills, he is still in a way getting a free ride because he came home. However he will have to also pay rent just like he did with his (roommates) and chores, nothing will really change. Except that His Mother and Sister, a Son in law and 3yr old niece will be here for him.

3. YOUR right I do blame his friends and Society: I will have to stop this. Even though I feel so strongly that I understand what you are saying. It is still his fault because he had Free Will to make the choices. I guess then that is were I have to change MY Self.

Maybe I am the one that still blames society, and my own parents, ex husband. They had there Free will and chose it over me. I guess i have not learned this in life. I can see what you mean.

Which then leads to Maybe I do not take responsibility for my self or my actions either but always take it for others...

I have to search my heart on this one.. I think you hit the nail on the hammer.. thank you...... Sometimes when we look at are self's it helps us look at the real picture... Thank YOU... If i am blaming then. He is blaming his Mother and Father, friends, ect for his problems, and that could be a situation that might explode in the house.. Great Point.... I use to be told i stereo type but I guess this is more the truth.. I BLAME!...
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I do think that going into this with your eyes wide open is in everyone's best interests.
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This is why I came here in the first place to have anyone help me and give me advice on this.. I have been giving so much advice to so many people but now it is my turn to listen and learn... This is something I have not dealt with.. So thank all of you for talking to me and helping me through all of this.