Daniel, please post an update.

As you know, tantrums are characteristic of ADHD, usually lasting about
20-30 minutes. Changing his routine, by putting him to bed early, is
likely your trigger here. Do you have a support group, or something
similar, to help you with discovering new discipline methods?

Um, River, it's not good form to recommend cold water on the face of a
child with a neurological disorder. ADHD tantrums can be caused by
sensory overload; the last thing he would need is cold water.

Please talk to legal aid.

I am adamant in my assertion that you should *not* file anything. You've
already got what you want and I think filing motions will only serve to
anger him and create an atmosphere for retribution.

Filing in MD will also create their having jurisdiction so even *if* you
get his *approval* to move, which will be needed once he is legally the
father and you've COs in place, you'll have to go to MD for every
revision of the CO.

Changing jurisdiction is hard to do; are you willing to travel?

*Recalls Cuban Missile Crisis* Get my meaning?

You asked if you could get him for abandonment which you cannot because
he has no child to abandon, at this point.

Connor,

He can't abandon a child that is not his, and such terminology is
generally used only for termination of parental rights issues e.g.
adoption proceedings.

. . .[A]fter the putative father legitimates his child according to
statutory provision, or submits to a judicial determination of
paternity, the child's parents stand on an equal footing as regards to
custody.


As to whether plaintiff has taken the necessary steps to legitimate
Kayla, this Court has identified several procedures bywhich a biological
father may legitimate his child: (1) through a verified petition filed
with the superior court seeking to have the child declared legitimate,
(2) by subsequent marriage to the mother, or (3) through a civilaction
to establish paternity filed pursuant to Gen. Stat. § 49-14.

Yes, you are the only parent, in the legal sense, to that child as of
now.

He must take the steps to assert his potential rights by filing the
necessary motions.

Cute,

He can't just take the child; it's called kidnapping. He has no legal
rights until such are declared by CO.

Legal issues are governed by strategy and one must play intelligently.
If she files first, which is illogical given that she is sole legal and
physical custodian, she will intice him to revenge.

Not a smart move in my mind.

Emotional,

Could you explain why she should file first? I am sincerely interested
in your logic.

She already has custody thus rendering the filing of any motions
irrelevant. The only thing she can file for is for child support and I
wouldn't even recommend doing that until after she has met the residency
requirements for the new state. Otherwise she risks drawing him out to
counter-file. He may leave things the way they are if not provoked.

'Tis not her responsibility to file papers determining visitation; it's
his.

He has no rights until a court order gives them to him. He must file for
custody/visitation as you're are automatically the custodial parent. The
only thing signing the acknowledgement of paternity did was open him up
to financial responsibility, not custodial rights. Depending on your
state, there is a time limit in which a putative father can ask for DNA
testing after having signed such papers. I am sure he'll appreciate that
later!

His living with his parents doesn't make him look badly to a court,
please be aware of that. However, his his living states away from you
and the fact that he's not been able to co-parent will certainly impact
a decision. Status quo is also relevant to child custody.

You've nothing to worry about...but to ease your worries contact legal
aid.

Mike,

Cyclothymia is a lesser form of bi-polar: the mania and depression is
less severe; most often diagnosed in teens and adults in their 20s.

There are many differentials involved in making a diagnosis because
cyclothymia is difficult to pinpoint as its mood spectrum is not as
severe as other illnesses.

Counseling with the appropriate mental health professionals and meds
will help. I also advocate the use of diet, exercise, and herbals to
help unless contra-indicated.

Hottie, (hmmm, I dislike using that moniker given the gravity of the
post)

Anyway, I highly suggest counseling for the both of you. I realize that
her only being 18 months might make you believe that such pursuits are
useless, however much can be deciphered of a child that young through
their play, drawings, etc.

Parenting classes will help you to learn discipline techniques that
work. However, it must be noted that children are individuals thus it
may take several different procedures to try before finding one that she
responds to.

Your local health and police depts should have resources for abused
women and children that are free and/or sliding scale. I suggest that
you get into contact with these resources ASAP given your current level
of frustration and that it can take awhile to get in such programs.

Good luck.

Vanessa...I like your name, by the way

You may move as you are not restricted by any court order. However until
you gain residency in NY, you are still a resident in GA, thus if he
files papers, you will be compelled to return to GA for hearings as they
would hold jurisdiction.

You are NOT kidnapping your child. You are the natural parent thus you
have rights until a court orders otherwise. That being said, as the
natural father, he, too, has rights that are equal to yours.

If you do move successfully, it is typical for the moving parent to have
the burden of visitation costs. It also makes you look as though you are
attempting to keep the father from his child...not a good thing to put
in front of a judge. There are many who still give Gardner credit in his
theory of Parental Alienation Syndrome as evidenced by case law.

Please consult an atty before you make any decision as they are aware of
local statutes, judges, etc. Look up legal aid in your area.

Good luck,
V.

I get the same thing...so I don't accept IM until I have talked to
someone via email for awhile. It's not always a guarantee but most won't
wait that long!

Fitness, I forgot to add that I am glad you put up a citation for us to
view. It helps to put things in perspective!

What I find curious about this is that lately the Brits have come under
attack for being intolerant of Muslims regarding the wearing of the
niqab in public. It seems that the PC thing to do would have been to
allow the women to keep wearing such garments so as not to offend their
religion.

I realize that, that doesn't necessarily have anything to do with school
curriculum, but I decided I wanted to throw it out there as an example
of the Brits also seemingly being unPC.

Welcome!!

Welcome!!

Dear, if I could keep my own house clean, I'd be happy! lol! I could
channel you some energy...will that help?

*raises hand* Present!

Yeah but I'd rather feed the animals; they deserve an easy meal once in
awhile!