Topic: pursued vs. stalked | |
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Good question. I had been dating someone that after only a few weeks
wanted to be very intimate with me. Now I am not a prude by any means, but I do know of the emotional connection that leads to. I enjoy a healthy lifestyle and also enjoy a healthy sex life, but only when it's with the right person. He was not only looking for a woman for him, but for a mother for his son. Sorry, but been there, done that and don't want to go back. |
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Yes, that is a good question, Sluggo. I can usually tell when the
person uses way too much flattery when they first meet me or talk to me online - so fake, that. Or if they seem to adapt their responses to what they think you want to hear. When I feel discomfort, I am straight-up and tell him, "look, man, this just isn't going to work." And I try to be nice about it. I have learnt how to set boundaries with people and for me, that was the key. Because life is too short to date someone just because you don't want to hurt their feelings or can't think of a "reason" not to...if you don't want to date them, that should be reason enough. Just be kind about it. |
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Muse, I agree with you but I have had women stalk me and even go to
extremes that make me wonder about a witness relocation program. I have had in the past go to the extreme of chatting with a detctive who did solve my problem quickly, but I hate having to involve law enforcemnt like that as they have better things to do. The most extreme measure is involving people who I would not want to be indebted to. |
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Wow, Dan, that sounds pretty horrible! Maybe the reason I haven't had
that experience is because I am a therapist and that seems to put lunatics off lol. Or the minute they want free therapy I refer them to a psychiatrist! Seriously, sorry to hear you had that problem...must have been quite awful for you. |
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Scared hell no. Just irritated more then anything. There are people like
that every where and I just happened to run across a few. Most were very pretty women who could have their pick of guys, but I do not understand why I was picked to be pursued. I do not blindly jump into bed with anyone, and am very careful of who I do go to bed with. I have learned that this can be a very touchy subject with some. I do not pickup women at bars for this reason, although alot of the guys I run with don't understand why their life is misreable when they bring home people like this. |
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If you are both on the same page you shouldn't have to draw the
line...and for that matter if your gut is telling you something and you are feeling uncomfortable then you should pay attention to that. When people fail to listen to their inner voice they invite DRAMA into their lives. |
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Interesting situations...
I tend to start out as "Friends" with women and let it be known. I'll go out and have a good time out on the town and if something happens sexually it happens, but I don't force the situation. Plus this adds some good insite on how the person is while you're just having fun (i.e. is she Caring, is she Supportive, is she Honest, what her views are on being Equal, is she a Gold Digger, etc...) Not everyone you date is meant to be your future Spouse but I don't see anything wrong with Friends you like going to go out to Movies with, Dinner with, Concerts with, etc... |
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Sometimes hanging out with friends is just what the doctor ordered!
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