so difficult......????

I left Pa for various reasons...

but i left my 18 yr old there to finish his senior year....

he is safe....he is with family and living with a friend of mine...

His 25 yr old 1/2 brother who I raised since he was 4til 13 wanted to talk to me..

He lost his mom in tragity..

H etold me he and my son and the entire family understand why I had to go....

My ex continues to bash me...his son hates him right now for what his father put me and his mom thru..and his mom is dead and he can only rely on me...he loves me with all his heart..

Why he hates his dad at this point is from the things he is saying about me now....

And his father has the financial means to have been there during this difficult time..

what took me down is my son being in the Marines...even though I Honor him and stand besid him...it still hurts bad...

but I was told my son Brad is crying so hard...he misses me and still needs me...we have never been apart..yes this summer he wil go to college..but he then would be prepared...

I am not finished quiding him as a mom..

So I am going home..for a few weeks...come back to FLA..then go back again to PA to be with my son...

This is the most difficult time for both my sons, me and my step son...

Both my sons Brett and Bradley are so close and now they are apart..it hurts thenm so badly..

While waiting for a call to make the arrangements I needed to get this off my chest..

Thank u for listening...

((((((((((Zanne))))))))))

Safe trip...

bless you! there's nothing like a mothers love....

Stay positive it will all work out.

((((zanne)))) Hope everything works out!

Sometimes through the growing of our children and the love we feel for them, they find life very hard w/o us in theirs, so YOU do what you think you need to do.
But I have found that THEY have to experience alot of LIFE on their own to be able to lose their fear of not having me there.

I hope you can make everything better for all and come out in smiles and a deeper love for each other...Be safe...

Bless you, I will say a prayer for you

life is difficult because what comes after is paradise.

Many blessings to you and your family

To My Bradley

You are the twinkle in my eyes,

that puts the sparkle in my heart,

I love You always, forever,

For enternity.


To my Brett

The bright shining star you are,

brightens my heart and my life,

I Love you always, for ever ,

For eternity.

I wrote this on a christmas ornament that is the shape of a star...

I keep them safe for them...

They read them every xmas...

I brought them with me to FLA..with many other things that belong to them....

good luck hun

at least you don't have a 19-year old daughter who just got knocked-up by her tattoed, no-job havin', waste-of-life boyfriend. my cousin from illinois just called me in a panic about what happened.

coming from a family with an uncle who had pretty much been in a similar situation (which ironically is now said cousin came about), and several other members of my extended family with an apparent inability to "keep it in the pants", i personally wasn't surprised.

there's nothing like family drama to add gray hairs to the noggin with.

God Bless you Zanne and all the things you are going through right now, I know your sons need you and want to see you in person and show you how proud they are, but remember that love for your own blood is more precious then God can offer you and you must follow your heart on these things.

I wish you a safe trip and may God Bless you and your loved ones!

(((((((zanne)))))))

So true IAM...thats why I am going to go back and forth..to be there for him..but also I believe this will prepare him for college..

It's just that there is so much more to the seperation of parent child...

He misses his brother...he is worried about his brother..his brother is leaving for Irraq in Aug...

So its very difficult..

thank u for ur words of wisdom...

Oh and Zanne...take me with you

Bless your heart , I understand those types of feelings...hugs...