James Bond walks into a bar and sits next to a beautiful young blonde and after a few minutes he starts looking anxiously at his watch.
"Your date late?"
the blonde asks.
"No, "
replies Bond,
"This isn't just a watch. It's a micro-chip camera and computer that analyzes data using a combination of pixel breakdown, G.P.S., and a meditational technique I learned in Tibet for controlling, amongst other things, alpha waves."
The blonde then asks:
"Really, well what's it telling you right now?"
Bond looks down at his watch then back to her with a James Bond smirk, he says:
"It's telling me your not wearing any panties."
The blonde grins:
"I'm sorry...
The blonde casts playfully for his name...and Bond replies:
"The name's Bond. James Bond"
She continues:
"Well, Mr. Bond, you're wrong. I'm wearing...a thong."
"Bloody hell, "
says Bond,
"The damn thing's an hour fast."