1. Okay, okay! I take it back. Unf*ck you.
2. You say I'm a b*tch like it's a bad thing.
3. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.
4. Well, aren't we a damn ray of sunshine?
5. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after.
6. Do I look like a people person?
7. This isn't an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting.
8. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.
9. Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.
10. Why don't you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control?
11. I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 30 years.
12. Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.
13. Do they ever shut up on your planet?
14. I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.
15. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't gone to sleep yet!
16. Back off!! You're standing in my aura.
17. Don't worry. I forgot your name too.
18. I work 45 hours a week to be this poor.
19. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
20. Wait... I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
21. Chaos, panic and disorder... my work here is done.
22. Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
23. You look like sh*t. Is that the style now?
24. Earth is full. Go home.
25. Aw, did I step on your poor little itty bitty ego?
26. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.
27. A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth.
28. You are depriving some village of an idiot.
29. If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.
30. Look in my eyes ... Do you see one ounce of gives-a-sh*t?

MEGAN, I SEE YOU ON THE NEXT SEASON OF 'BAD GIRLS CLUB'

How about this one..

Things women just don't say.....


1. Do you think this dress makes me look too slim.
2. You take me out too much, can't we just stay in.
3. A fake one will do.
4. You look stressed out, let me give you a blowjob.
5. Have a night out with your mates, you deserve it.
6. That Pamela Anderson has a lovely body.
7. My mother is a real old *****.
8. No, No, you buy me too much already.
9. Give it to me hard up the ass, big boy; you know I love it.
10. What headache?
11. Put your money away, let me buy the round.
12. You know, I've been complaining a lot lately. I don't blame you for ignoring me.
13. The new girl in my office is a stripper. I invited her over for dinner on Friday.
14. While you were in the bathroom, they went for it on fourth down and missed. If they can hold them to a field goal they'll still cover.
15. Bar food again?? Kick ass!!
16. I liked that wedding even more than ours. Your ex-girlfriend has class.
17. I love hearing stories about your old girlfriends. Tell me more.
18. Let's just leave the toilet seat up all the time; then you won't have to mess with it anymore.
19. It's only the third quarter, you should order a couple more pitchers.
20. I'm so happy with my new hairstyle, I don't think I'll ever change it again.
21. I love when my pillow smells like your cigars and scotch. You passed out before brushing your teeth again, ya big silly!

Haaaaa ahahahahahahaha....zis the tag-team thread or what?!