An Irish man went to confession in St. Patrick’s Catholic Church ..

‘Father’, he confessed, ‘ it been one month now since my last confession…
I was intimate with Fanny Green twice last month ..’

The priest told the sinner, ‘You are forgiven .. Go out and say three Hail Mary’s ..’

Soon thereafter, Another Irish man entered the confessional

‘Father, it has been two months since my last confession. I’ve had sex with Fanny Green twice a week for the past two months ..’

This time, the priest questioned, ‘Who IS this Fanny Green .. ?’

‘A new woman in the neighbourhood father, he replied. …

‘Very well’, sighed the priest .. Go and say ten Hail Mary’s’ ..

At mass the next morning, as the priest prepared to deliver the sermon, a tall,
Voluptuous, drop-dead gorgeous Redheaded woman entered the sanctuary ..

The eyes of every man in the church fell upon her as she slowly sashayed up the aisle and sat down right in front of the priest ..

Her dress was green and very short, and she wore matching shiny emerald-green shoes ..

The priest and the altar boy gasped as the woman in the green dress and matching green shoes sat with her legs spread slightly apart, but just enough to realize she wasn’t wearing any underwear.

The priest turned to the Altar boy and whispered, ‘Is That Fanny Green …?’

The bug-eyed altar boy couldn’t believe his ears but managed to calmly reply,‘No Father, I think it’s just a Reflection from her shoes’ …!!’

*Fanny is another word for the ladies intimate bit*

Murphy goes into the confessional box after years of being away from the Church.

He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down.

There’s a fully equipped bar with crystal glasses, the best vestry wine, Guinness on tap, cigars and liqueur chocolates nearby.

And on the wall a fine photographic display of various women who appear to have misplaced their garments.

He hears a priest come in. “Father, forgive I think its been a while since I’ve been to confession and to be sure I must say that the confessional box is much better than it used to be.

The priest replies, “Get out, you idiot. You’re on my side!”