that is what lawyers are for

i cant go there

the judge felt sorry for my x, and so did my daughter guardian ad lidan(her lawyer), they thought i was too bitter and because i CHOSE to work i gave up my parental rights, my x was an uncontrolled epliptic, i HAD to work becaues he legally could not, but i got screwed, he was give majority custody because he was available to take care of her (and he has to live with his mom- no income)i was ordered to pay child support for 6 months even though i wasnt working because of a injury, and HIS mother started molesting OUR daughter, there were witness but because our daughter wouldnt admit it in front of a cop i was called a liar. she was 5 at the time, she now 6. i cant or wont talk about custody in washington state cauze my mama told me if you cant say something nice........................

lawyers are only in it for the money

i forgot his mom was i a car wreck with our child but because the laywer miss filed a piece of paper, i could get him for negleact. the car was flipped over, our daughter got out but his mom had to be extraced, and he waited 12 hours to tell me, and it was during her birthday party, so he refused to take her ER
even though she might have a concussion, she had a nice bruise on her forhead
my just sorry but you should have been double checking us thats what 3000$ got me

Was nice to see a psot like this.I for one am having major issues with the mother of my 2 children.I was a stay at home father for 5 years and raised her son from another father and my 2 kids since they where in diapers.I was working at the time my daughter was born but after 4 weeks she stated that she didnt want to remain home with the kids and that she wanted to go back to work and stick my 4 week old daughter into day care.which in my eyes was just wrong...4 weeks old?So i made the dumb mistake of quiting my job and becoming a stay at home father.As soon as my daughter turned 2 i told her i was wanting to get back into the work force to support my family....low and behold a month later she was pregant again with my son.which seemed funny since she was on the patch and i was using condoms.Well needless to say i stayed home again.3 years go by again i tell her that i need to work..so i start loking for a job.Out of now where i got a cop at the door arresting her for theft from her employer over the last 2 1/2 years in the sum of 30-40 grand.which was a shock to me since we had always been living hand to mouth so to speak.I split up with her 2 weeks later and took my 2 kids to my mothers home to start over.Then i find out that because we where never married that she gets primary placement of my kids without even going to court.She controled all the money,the car,and what i could or could not do.Yes i was stupid for allowing her to do so.But my kids mean more than anything to me and have been with me full time for 5 years.Shes up on charges for grand theft..will be getting nailed for welfare fraud since she never reported the extra income to the state for food stamps and is going to be under investigation by the irs and no one from the child support agency is doing anything about anything.She is also trying to get support from me,which i dont have a problem paying but since we split the kids have been in my care 75% more of the time than in hers.The fact of the matter is is because im a guy everything gets looked over or past over and given to the woman regaurdless if she is a unfit mother and a soon the be fellon.

I had to get a lawyer to even get to see my son in the first place. Then the courts reamed me up the ass and now she's done a few things that she shouldn't have done oh like pull him out of daycare when part of the support is for daycare. Then the stupid bi*ch was bright enough to have another kid and yet she complains about having no money. She's just lazy and looking for a free ride, I mean why work when you can suck off me. I'm keeping a handy dandy notebook of all the BS she has pulled I hope the judge fuking rips her a new one.

good luck with that one war cause my ex was in contempt of court 3 times and they did squatola !!

Well thats' nice to know, so the courts really don't give a rats ass about much then

I agree they have a right to see the kids but when they don't believe that the kids are theirs and they don't pay support...and my kids don't want anything to do with him...i'm not gonna hurt them and let their dad see them.

My older daughter's father and I were engaged and then I got pregnant and then he cheated on me and left me for someone 10 years older. I got my own place, worked throughout my pregnancy (i wish i could have during my 2nd) and never heard from him for the rest of the 8 months. So I moved about 4 hours away, came to visit the city when my baby was 2 days old and called him. He was such a jerk and didn't even want to see his daughter since he had no say in her name (a phone call would have been nice) Long story short, since I still lived 4 hours away, his new gf (the one he cheated on me with) used to call me to arrange visits, I used to drive the 4 hours here, let him have her the weekend, and then drive back. On one visit, I realized instead of them driving her back (which was gonna be the 1st time) we would have to be in town like 2 weeks after, so called and offered him the choice even though this was only his 3rd visit with her. He called back and said he was just going to keep her since no one had custody!! Anyway, custody time comes, since the long distance at 17 months, after 3 visits, he gets her 2 weeks I get her 2 weeks! After I moved into the area, went back to court, they kept it the same, even after I had proof that the 2 weeks he had her he was dropping her off at his aunt's house to care for her the whole 2 weeks, and there were some serious concerns about the way she was being fed!

Thank god he has signed his rights over! Even though I didn't like him, etc., I still gave him a chance with his daughter, which sometimes, the courts still have a hard time dealing with!

But now, I was married for 3 years, and everytime I used to have a disagreement with my ex (usually about his excessive drinking) he would threaten to take the kids, disappear and take me for child support. I had never threatened to take his kids away from him, ever or take him for child support!

But can you imagine if my ex hadn't signed his rights over what would have happened? It could have been a toss up (the only reason I didn't get primary at the time was due to a juvenille offense my then hubby had-- his dad was beating his mom when he was 15 and he interfered, my ex's lawyer actually asked if he was drinking at the time, yea, 15, drinking, gets arrested and no record )

Anyway, point of story, I understand both sides of the story and think every person, with exceptions should get to see their kids, I would just strongly advise something in writing and as much of a chore it is, a writing log. Communicate by email if possible, I know my ex sent me quite a few that would have "buried" him in court.

All I know is my boys have not seen there dad in 5yrs and it is not cause I have kept him from seeing them. It is because he is a Jerk. I couldn't stand to go one day without seeing my kids. He stopped sending CS in July and in the State of Oklahoma:

If he does not have any contact with the boys or pay CS for one year. I can take him to court and take any rights away he did have, which I am really considering. I can also change their last name, and I would love for the boys to carry on my Dad's name.

That is just how I feel about it tho

My ex, has not seen our kids since august last year...he decided to move to spain to be with a women he met on the internet...go figure

There are clearly both fair and unfair cases where either parent is granted custody. For those whose other parent is abusive or has abuse problems it's a very different story. I've known some great dads who were parenting the children by themselves. I've known more moms that do. I also have seen the non-custodial parent, just play games to hurt the other person at the children's expense. Abuse is not fun for the kids to see or hear. My ex went several months before trying to see the kids on 2 seperate ocassions. That's very hurtful to a teenager.
I guess they were lucky his didn't move to Spain. If it wouldn't be hurtful to them, geesh, I'd take out a loan if necessary to get him there!

My ex and i broke up at 7 months preg. I broke it off with him because he wouldent do anything. When we were together he wouldent help me at all..he wanted me to do everything for him even tho i was pukin and real sick. He told me no when i asked him to fix up the spare room for the baby's room and organize the place for the new baby. He didnt want to get a new job to support us . He lived in Michigan and im in ontario. I was doing a fiancee visa to move to his place. He didnt want to help or do anything. He wasnt making enough money for himself to live and i thought we would get married and i would be able to work and we could move when we had money.

I know this sounds selfish but i did everything for my daughter and all he did was start it. She is more mine then his. I had to go on welfare to support me and my child. He didnt even pay child support untill the worker made me go after him. He hasnt asked to see his child. Only claims he wants to see her and doesnt ask for arrangements to be made. But i honestly dont want him to see her. I hate it when people get try to get the reward when they did nothing to help out.

Dads who show they care right at the start should have rights.

This topic ONCE AGAIN has NOTHING to do with bashing a guy on what he has done or hasnt done!! If you want to do that PLEASE go and make a thread for it! This thread was started for the GOOD guys who dont understand or know they have those rights NOT for "oh he doesnt do this or doesnt do that"..thats a thread for the bad guys!

i thank those of you who have posted some of those rights and want to say sorry that this thread is not staying on the TOPIC of what it is suppose to be about!

I got a question...
my ex moved to Spain last year and has made no effort to see his kids, only an occasional phone call. Now he wants to inforce his visitation rights and is asking me to send the girls to Spain for a visit. Does anyone know if I'm legally obligated to send my girls halfway across the world?

You need to check with the authorizing court office concerning this question, and possibly a lawyer. Each state is different.

I think (but as always could be wrong) you do not have to allow your children out of the contry. That's a scary thought. You may have to get legal advice, as stated already.

my dad tried to kill me and my mom so i dont think fathers are a purpose in this world have the kids and disown the men

I remember when my ex and I separated. She went to a different state and since we weren't married I had no rights under my state's law. But in her state I had equal legal and physical custody. Now we're in court in her state and fighting for custody.

I love my son more than anything and I am determined to be in his life no matter what. I know that I will never let anyone get between me and my boy. Especially since I was his primary caretaker while they both lived with me.

Before I say what I'm gonna say I just want it to be known I haven't read every page of this.

I was just curious about this. Do you think the father still has rights even if he left the mother while pregnant without even a notice of anykind and hasn't attempted to even see or speak to his child? My sons father left me when I was 6-7months pregnant even when I asked him to tell me upfront if he wasn't going to stay with me or come be with me (we met in college 5hrs from my home) and he lied straight to my face. May 6,07 was the last I spoke to him because he just changed his number and didn't ever call back. He's supposed to pay child support but lost his job or something and I haven't gotten a payment since my son turned 1 and they were less than $100. My son is now 17months and has never seen his father or spoken to him. If one day his dad decides he wants to come back then do you think I should still give him the opportunity?