My 7 year old is brilliant. (Really). He can do complex addition and multiplication in his head and always get the correct answer. He knows all 50 states and their geographical regions, he knows where most major cities are located in the US. He plays Chess and Clue and games of reasoning and wins against adults!

But we are struggling with his reading and writing. This child gives me hell everytime I sit down with him to read. He refuses to sound out words and always wants me to spell them out for him. He writes in the worst chickenscratch and just refuses to try. He knows how to read... but REFUSES TO READ.

Is this laziness? How do I help him? I've had his eyes tested. I've taken him for A.D.D and A.D.H.D. testing... and the doctors tell me he is normal.
He starts an afterschool reading tutoring program 2 days a week on Monday. I have tried to make it fun for him- we sing karaoke (but he will only sing songs he memorized the words to)... we write our own short stories together, but lately he won't participate. I've even tried playing board games like Scrabble Jr and Boggle with him... and to no avail. I personally read to my kids for a 1/2 hour before bed every night. I read on my own all the time... so it isn't like I'm NOT setting a good example for him.

Any tips/pointers?

that's not him flipping us all of on your profile photo is it? haha...

anyway, most of us guys are naturally resistant to reading - I'd suggest starting with what he likes - is he into dinosours, or science fiction... get him interested in ANY reading... just to get him in the habbit...

just a starting point...

You need to find out his "currency" and then work out goals, as inpositive reinforcement and motivation. Sit down with his teacher. Get him involved with a reading tutor in the school. I would seriously suggest an evaluation by a child psychologist. You are doing the right things, but just not found the one that works yet. Kudos to being a loving parent.

hi most boys hate writing things down, boys can be lazy like that, try comics i did with my son and star charts ie every new word he learns to sound and read he gets a star and so many stars gets him a reasonable treat, something he likes and also look at stuuf he likes to do or is interested in hope that helps

I agree to all the suggestions so far , and my limited experience with my 2 , they 15 and 12 now, was start by reading to them, then flipping them the comics from the paper, then having them read them back to me ,then attempting to discover what " tweaked" their interest ...
I say do not worry to much about it YET, the child is ONLY 7 ... right ?...
Good luck ..

No... that's my daughter... and she is "beckoning with her index finger" not flipping anyone off.

The school he's in isn't very supportive. I am transferring him in February to a new school.(We have to move)... He has books on ALL subjects- sci fi, fantasy, sports, geography, comic books, science/planets/human body, how-to-draw, travel... Goosebumps... I have spent TONS of money on books HE has picked out... I have library cards for the Niles and Chicago public libraries... we go to the library twice a week...PLUS he has library at school.

People 'dis comic books. I'm intelligent with a vocabulary that I'm frequently commended for. Most of that I actually picked up from comic book 'vocab'. Some of them are admittedly written by tiny monkey men at the local asylum, but if you get some good, intelligent reading to stimulate his mind with admirably cool art then you really can't lose if he gets interested I believe. Boys like "cool kickin butt action. there's a time for learning but if you give him a reading "outlet" it may show him a different side that will interest him.

All things done in moderation a well rounded child.

Also, don't obsess over it. Sounds like he has his niche at the moment and if that's as major of a concern you have then there's nothing to really 'worry' about. Let him be who he is maybe.

Sorry if I sound presumptuous. Just hitting it from all angles 'cuz I 'don't know you or your' particular situation.

Thanks for reading it anyway.

he sounds a great kid hun and very intelligent i really wouldnt worry he will catch up i had same with mine and worked with son and school and went right back to basics with the phoinics books, dont know if you do them over there but try star chart as well and dont worry you doing a brill job

Hey! well, ok, that's true... hehe...

Poins made while I was typing. Nevermind.



Choose your battles. Most parental 'worries' amount to a hill of beans and stress you out anyway. Trying to control somthing you can't but killing your joy or smothering your munchkin causing them stress and tension oft times..I just enjoy the quirks and let them be them. Everyone has a unique personality and gifting.

yeh boys can be lazy lol

Thank you guys...
I've never been a 7 year old boy... so it's hard for me to understand...lol...

My fiance has luck with him... my son will at least email and write letters to him... (he is overseas)... but as for his reading at home- his school requires 20 minutes of reading per night... and my son WON'T budge. The school ends up calling me insulting MY parenting capabilities and telling me I need to be more involved with my son's academic career.

Single mom of 2... donates every spare minute to the munchkin... but 2 things I WILL NOT DO FOR MY KIDS:
1. Lie and say they did an assignment if I know they didn't.
2. DO a homework assignment FOR my kid.

Life has consequences for actions... if I start covering up for my kids now... they will NEVER take responsibility and will always look to mom for bailing and fixing.

The He!! you say!

yea, well English chicks have funny accents!
(Subtitle for the humor impared - English women have WAY COOL accents)

I recently just went through this with some of my cousins i was watching and we are getting my nephew into it now... We got them the beginners books they have in walmart that have to do with some of the cartoons they watch and that kind of got them interested. I also used flash cards and started with very easy small words... he didnt like it at first but i basically told him he wasnt going to do anything until he read for a little bit..i did it for about 15 mins twice a day...right now he's getting really good at reading..he also will want me to say the words for him and for the first 2 times i helped him sound them out and then when he came upon the same word again i told him i knew he knew it and he would eventually sound it out himself...he now gets mad at me for helping him sometimes ..this really really helped for me...hope it does for you too!!

try the Magic Tree House series by Mary Pope Osborne. These books are terrific and my son loves them. I have my son in a traditional school and he can read every word that I am typing here and he is in first grade, so you might look for one or a charter school when you move, because the school has a lot to do with his sucess, also if you have a computer at home, let him cruise around on it to sites that he is interested in.. I guarantee he will read while on line, and WHO says he has to sit down with a BOOK for those twenty minutes? My son loves to read the news...also, as a "Reward" you might consider paying for him to be a member of Club Penguin, which is a really cool on-line game..( hard to discribe) but it is only 5.95 for the month and they read the "newspapers" to see what is new, and can buy igloos, furniture,pets,clothes....whoops this got long!

i started my son out with the reader rabbit computer games and he took it from there.He reads great in school but hates it at home and writes messy but hey they are tired when they come home after six hours of school .I also when reading to him read one page or two pages,he reads the next one or two etc.Also i pretend to mispronounce words and he grabs the book and reads it correctly.
i dont do home work for my kid either and if he doesnt want to do it then he can face the teachers wrath

My sister was a great reader but always refused to read when she was that age . We found out that reading just wasn't exciting enough for her and she needed more stimulation . My Mom found books on CD-Rom that read with you and have little videos and cool graphics and that seemed to help .

If this is why you are trying to get tips on how to make your son read, guess what I have the answer. So far no one has come up with the simplest of solutions. If your son is refusing to do his homework, get tough and be the adult! Here's a novel idea... it's called grounding. Make some consequenses for his actions. Ever tried taking away different privledges or his most prized possessions as a consequence for not doing his homework? As a last resort ever tried spanking? Ever tried giving rewards when he does do his homework? Sounds to me that your child is brilliant for sure... brilliant at manipulating you. He's a kid... and at one time or another all kids hate to do homework.

2 months ago I took away ALL his video games and TV from his room. No luck.
Last month I cancelled the Cable TV... We don't have TV at all now because where I live we don't get reception for the regular channels.
I have even had to take away board games from this child.

Spanking? Yes. I've considered. And YES, I have... and my father, who lives downstairs from me has gotten the police involved accusing me of "beating" my child. Open hand on the butt- 2 or 3 swats? Hardly beating... there were no marks left. My son screamed bloody-murder... and embellished the tale. I've tried "time out" also- can't get the kid to sit or stand quietly... I make him stay anyway... but the screaming is unbearable and it gets dear old dad involved thinking I'm hitting the kid. (my parents abused us as kids, so he naturally thinks I am abusive and now he is trying to "break the cycle"...)

Oh, yes, I've had social workers knock on my door... courtesy of my bro in the Army (who isn't even around) Because I am apparently abusive and neglectful. Social workers found his accusation unfounded and BS...

So you see... I get hit from all angles. I am doing EVERYTHING I CAN THINK OF. I even have him starting an after school reading program this week at his school.

My son does ALL his homework except for his reading. He will sometimes even sit there and PRETEND to read. I CANNOT be with him 24/7... I have to work to pay the bills. I do the best I can with what I am given. The child's room is bare, aside from Books, Art Supplies and school materials. (He needs to work on his writing... and I encourage ART as a way to develop his motor skills in controlling the pencils, etc.)

Rewards... yes. I beleive in non-monetary rewards. I will give verbal praise anytime he does his work. At the end of the week if he's done all his work, I will let him stay up late on Friday and pop popcorn and we watch movies. I will also revoke the board game restriction on weekends if he's completed his tasks. During the week, I read at least a half hour to my kids every night. If my son reads, however long he reads, I add that amount of time to the amount of time I read to him. Also- I implemented "family reading time"... where my son, my daighter and I are supposed to sit down for a 1/2 hour and do our own reading. My daughter is only 4... so she looks at her books and I will sometimes read to her other times I let her quietly look at the books and I do my own reading. The stories I read to my kids are picked by them... I am setting the best examples possible.

So, please... if there is something I am missing, enlighten me.
This isn't a case of being manipulated and it isn't a case of poor parently. It's an issue of my son butting heads with me and being defiant. I am looking for creative solutions to getting results... something to make it fun or create interest for him... not lectures on how this is "bad parenting". Thank You.

2 months ago I took away ALL his video games and TV from his room. No luck.
Last month I cancelled the Cable TV... We don't have TV at all now because where I live we don't get reception for the regular channels.
I have even had to take away board games from this child.

Spanking? Yes. I've considered. And YES, I have... and my father, who lives downstairs from me has gotten the police involved accusing me of "beating" my child. Open hand on the butt- 2 or 3 swats? Hardly beating... there were no marks left. My son screamed bloody-murder... and embellished the tale. I've tried "time out" also- can't get the kid to sit or stand quietly... I make him stay anyway... but the screaming is unbearable and it gets dear old dad involved thinking I'm hitting the kid. (my parents abused us as kids, so he naturally thinks I am abusive and now he is trying to "break the cycle"...)

Oh, yes, I've had social workers knock on my door... courtesy of my bro in the Army (who isn't even around) Because I am apparently abusive and neglectful. Social workers found his accusation unfounded and BS...

So you see... I get hit from all angles. I am doing EVERYTHING I CAN THINK OF. I even have him starting an after school reading program this week at his school.

My son does ALL his homework except for his reading. He will sometimes even sit there and PRETEND to read. I CANNOT be with him 24/7... I have to work to pay the bills. I do the best I can with what I am given. The child's room is bare, aside from Books, Art Supplies and school materials. (He needs to work on his writing... and I encourage ART as a way to develop his motor skills in controlling the pencils, etc.)

Rewards... yes. I beleive in non-monetary rewards. I will give verbal praise anytime he does his work. At the end of the week if he's done all his work, I will let him stay up late on Friday and pop popcorn and we watch movies. I will also revoke the board game restriction on weekends if he's completed his tasks. During the week, I read at least a half hour to my kids every night. If my son reads, however long he reads, I add that amount of time to the amount of time I read to him. Also- I implemented "family reading time"... where my son, my daighter and I are supposed to sit down for a 1/2 hour and do our own reading. My daughter is only 4... so she looks at her books and I will sometimes read to her other times I let her quietly look at the books and I do my own reading. The stories I read to my kids are picked by them... I am setting the best examples possible.

So, please... if there is something I am missing, enlighten me.
This isn't a case of being manipulated and it isn't a case of poor parenting. It's an issue of my son butting heads with me and being defiant. I am looking for creative solutions to getting results... something to make it fun or create interest for him... not lectures on how this is "bad parenting". Thank You.