After trying to start a friendship with someone (and they were a bit pushy for me and I said so), and they disappeared. it leads me to wonder who to trust. His initial approach ended up turning me off because he's out for one thing, versus trying for a friendship.

Welcome to the wonderful world of online dating (can you hear the bit of sarcasm I have)

It happens to MOST of us....

I hope you find what your searching for

Yes, I can hear your sarcasm. It shouldn't have surprised me, but being a diehard romanticist....I simply try and hope for the best.

Well, there is no true 100 percentway, that I know..

But YOU can ask them to send YOU a pic of them NOW, to see if it matches their other ones. If they have NONE, then ask them to send ya one with their hand in the photo with their face,then you know better its the one in the photo..

Try to Get their phone number and see if it comes easy or that THEY don't want to give it out..

If you do get a number and talk, then see if he's against you calling him at a certain time, and if so ask why?

That should keep him from being married and using you that away..

But THATS all I got to help ya....

Thank you. Interesting points. It's strange because our conversations had started out ok, but I never talked to him on the phone, for which I'm very thankful now.

Honestly, I don't think there's a simple answer to your question.

I feel like I get a better read on people who post a lot, because you get to see them talk about different situations and topics, and you get a fuller idea of who they really are over time.

But that's not foolproof, either -- even someone you've been talking to for months, someone who has many, many posts, can suddenly change into a completely different person.

You just never know....

My strategy now, if I should happen to start talking to someone new, will be to take things VERY slowly, VERY carefully. We're not on a schedule here. I would rather take the extra time, and look for the red flags, than rush into something stupid and potentially dangerous....

indeed online dating is hit or miss

But mostly miss

Romantic, I think the online thing is close to the real deal in that you are going to run into more of the wrong ones than the right ones. We have all had that problem. I have been lucky in that there has only been one so far. Not including the youngsters who are collecting, that is a different story

i agree, mostly miss

read their profile, see who they are friends with. Mostly, see how they speak to you and try to talk on the phone for a while first.
If you feel uncomfortable at all, definately pay attention to that feeling.
Same thing in the offline world, but you have to keep your guard up higher on here.

Just be true to yourself!
Believe 1/2 of what you see & nothing they try to get you to believe.
Just make small talk don't ask questions that they'll feel the need to lie about.
Just be happy & enjoy the friends you make here & if they want to fit into your world that's all good too!
Let them know you don't NEED them to make your happiness.

Good luck & welcome to the site

I don't give out my phone # for a while.

With all the networking available on here, it's possible (s)he met someone that they wanted to pursue on a more exclusive level.

If not on here, than on the other tens of hundreds of dating sites available; or real life.

of course, but once you do find someone who might be a catch...you def. want to chat on the phone before you meet them.
Even then, you might to block your number when you call.

That in mind, I think it's a good idea to encourage people to lose their accounts.

If they've lost their account, or been inactive for a long time, it means they've found happiness in a relationship.

its a hit or miss online or in real life....dating is all the same....It can really suck...

Thank you, everyone, for your responses. It's truly appreciated. I'm suspecting now that this guy may be a player or something. His lines used were weird, and the fact he disappeared after I didn't like his pushiness...are indicators (at least to me) that he's not really meaning what he says. It's sad that people can't say what they mean and mean what they say. Ironically, his profile states that he's "fun to be around." I bet.

I have found on line dating tricky.

It is difficult trying to sort those a.) that want only bedroom activity 2.) those that are just checking you out to see if you are better than the last date C.) those that will fall in love with anyone that comes along. d.) those that are seriously looking for Ms Right

Many people use this medium to trick people, it's easy to do. Just be careful.