12. Hey, wasn't your daughter a porn queen?

11. I'm surprised you stopped me, Dunkin Donuts has a 3 for 1 special!

10. If I bend over, will I still get a ticket?

9. No, offi, offic, lucifer . . . I'm not as think you are drunk I am. I swear to dog.

8. No, I don't know how fast I was going. The little needle stops at 110 mph.

7. Back off, Barney, I've got a piece.

6. Want to race to the station, Sparky?

5. I know I was weaving, but I was trying to hit all the little green men!

4. On the way to the station let's get a six pack.

3. You'll never get those cuffs on me. . . You Homo!

2. Come on write the damn ticket, the bars close in 20 minutes!

1. No, YOU assume the position.

lmao......number 8, 5, 3 and 2.....

On the way to the station, let's get a six-pack...that one is very good.

I am an FTO in my department and i had this super cute rookie with me a few months back. We made a traffic stop and i waited in the unit while he went to the vehicle. It was a young girl and she was really working him hard. He came back and ran her stuff and wrote her up. He went back to her vehicle and she was mad - she said to him "I thought you didn't give pretty girls tickets?" He was a little flustered and he replied "We don't. Sign here ma'am."

She reported him to our chief for being "rude"

I still can't look at him without laughing.

i like number 7

i'll take #2 please!

I like number 2

11,7,6,3,and 1 are my favorites