she was always smiling, laughing, flirting, iniating convo with me, so i told her i like her and she said she has a bf, and shes 'not sure how she feels' about me. I told her its fine we can stay friends but now she is completely avoiding me, never looks at me or anything, what should i do? Can she really be not sure of was she just letting me down nicely?

Talk to her.. if no respond then move on.
You are still young!

Dude if she has a bf why are you even expecting anything & why is she leading you on If she has a dude? ....i think you're both a lil messed up

letting you down nicely.
accept and move on.

im not sure if she is leading me on, maybe she did like me she but she likes her bf more, its always going to be awkward between us after she turns me down, we work together

well lesson learnt then..

Don't sxxt where you eat

you listened to the small head more than you listened to your big head.

you work together.
so unless you want to make that awkward, you do not look at her in any other way than a colleague.
maybe she feels bad and weird now and talks to HR and you will lose your job over "harassment" or something.

dude.
use your BIG head.
keep work and private separate.

It certainly follows the pattern that..

1. she was extra friendly at first, in order to BE a friend, however...

2. YOU erroneously took this to indicate a romantic interest on her her part, therefore her only logical choice is now...

3. to keep you at arms length or more, since you were apparently unable to recognize the difference between a cheerful friend, and a would be lover.

Indeed, calm down and behave yourself as a coworker should.

If it's a co-worker then i personally think never to hit on a co-worker...ever

It is a mistake to even try dating a co-worker.
Just stay professional.

... or do it in such an obvious, clumsy and funny way that everyone laughs and has a good time :D

Simple, treat her the same way she treats you. Just ignore her, say hi, if she says hi and if she treats you cold, you do the same. Two can play at that game.

At last count there are like.....a gazillion chicks out there......so one indecisive chick is not worth the aggravation.

let it go man

move on

good luck

Quite honestly,I have to ask was she flirting or was she just being friendly. She was upfront and honest told you, she had a BF..

She was comfortable with you, til you crossed the line. I might have a whole different slant on this if and it is a huge"IF" she hadn't been upfront and honest with you. Now that you chose to cross the line here, she is pulling back.

When a person, is friends with someone, really friends, we do tend to let down our guard a bit more and it does come as a shock at times, when someone takes that friendship to a degree not expected. When something as simple as a close friendship that we enjoy and savour, relax, is put suddenly in to a whole new category. Makes the people involved uncomfortable and unsure of where the boundaries are and how to get them back in place. That is what this sounds like to me. Sorry

My advice if you really like her and enjoy her company back off a bit and relax and be friends....real friends. Don't muddy the waters.

Also Office romances are a bad idea from the start and most offices don't allow it.
Best wishes in your search

I've kissed a few female friends & they don't seem to mind

Great.
Go find someone that doesn't avoid you.


Respect her decisions as communicated via her behavior?


Could be both.

You do realize "not sure of how she feels" about you can easily mean "there's this creepy guy at work that sometimes seems nice, I'm not sure if I should try to be nice to him or if he's going to take that as me wanting to bang him. I'm not sure if he's just a creepy guy, or a nice guy. I'm not sure if I feel safe or in some stranger danger."

it's difficult to understand your point of confusion.
she told you she has a boyfriend. she makes it a point to avoid you.
what part don't you understand?

to continue pursuing her in the workplace this can set you up for a harassment action against you.

to pursue her outside of the work place says stalker.

not everyone who smiles at you wants to date you.
move on and good luck

Its simple... She loves her bf and the times she was flirting, chatting bla bla bla with you, she and her bf was probably in a misunderstanding thus making them give less attention and she needed someone to fill that empty space for a while until she and her bf get back to normal...that was what u were for, a back up plan when her bf is acting up... Move on bruh, look for someone who truly love you