Topic: LAUGH YOUR SORROW AWAY | |
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A man met a lion in d bush, he knelt down, closed his eyes & started praying. When he opend his eyes, he saw d lion kneeling in front of him & was praying too. He was shocked. He asked d lion "Are u a Christian"? The lion replied "Mumu. Dn't u pray b4 u eat"? D man fainted. Dn't laugh alone. Pls put a smile on someone's face by sharing. Who is Mumu?... ![]() |
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#91 is so true....
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A man met a lion in d bush, he knelt down, closed his eyes & started praying. When he opend his eyes, he saw d lion kneeling in front of him & was praying too. He was shocked. He asked d lion "Are u a Christian"? The lion replied "Mumu. Dn't u pray b4 u eat"? D man fainted. Dn't laugh alone. Pls put a smile on someone's face by sharing. Who is Mumu?... ![]() I had the same reaction... |
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A man met a lion in d bush, he knelt down, closed his eyes & started praying. When he opend his eyes, he saw d lion kneeling in front of him & was praying too. He was shocked. He asked d lion "Are u a Christian"? The lion replied "Mumu. Dn't u pray b4 u eat"? D man fainted. Dn't laugh alone. Pls put a smile on someone's face by sharing. Who is Mumu?... ![]() I had the same reaction... ![]() The lion and the mouse, I thought. |
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Where's the mouse in his story?
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"Modern Philosophies"
01. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried. 02. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking. 03. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it. 04. For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism. 05. He who hesitates is probably right. 06. Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with. 07. No one is listening until you make a mistake. 08. Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view. 09. The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to press on it. 10. The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread. 11. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research. 12. To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles. 13. Two wrongs are only the beginning. 14. Work is accomplished by those employees who are still striving to reach their level of incompetence. 15. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. (The corollary is: You never learn to pray until your kids learn to drive!) 16. The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard. 17. Monday is an awful way to spend one-seventh of your life. 18. The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up. ![]() |
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#16. I don't see a problem there at all. It's called the Darwin awards. Anybody else with me on this?
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#16. I don't see a problem there at all. It's called the Darwin awards. Anybody else with me on this? 'True'! ![]() |
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Collected Quotes from Albert Einstein
"Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius -- and a lot of courage -- to move in the opposite direction." "Imagination is more important than knowledge." "Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love." "I want to know God's thoughts; the rest are details." "The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax." "Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." "The only real valuable thing is intuition." "A person starts to live when he can live outside himself." "I am convinced that He (God) does not play dice." "God is subtle but he is not malicious." "Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character." "I never think of the future. It comes soon enough." "The eternal mystery of the world is its comprehensibility." "Sometimes one pays most for the things one gets for nothing." "Science without religion is lame. Religion without science is blind." "Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new." "Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds." "Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler." "Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen." "Science is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one's living at it." "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources." "The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education." "God does not care about our mathematical difficulties. He integrates empirically." "The whole of science is nothing more than a refinement of everyday thinking." "Technological progress is like an axe in the hands of a pathological criminal." "Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding." "The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible." "We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them." "Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school." "The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing." "Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater." "Equations are more important to me, because politics is for the present, but an equation is something for eternity." "If A is a success in life, then A equals x plus y plus z. Work is x; y is play; and z is keeping your mouth shut." "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe." "As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality." "Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods." "I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones." "In order to form an immaculate member of a flock of sheep one must, above all, be a sheep." "The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead." "Too many of us look upon Americans as dollar chasers. This is a cruel libel, even if it is reiterated thoughtlessly by the Americans themselves." "Heroism on command, senseless violence, and all the loathsome nonsense that goes by the name of patriotism -- how passionately I hate them!" "No, this trick won't work...How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?" "My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind." "Yes, we have to divide up our time like that, between our politics and our equations. But to me our equations are far more important, for politics are only a matter of present concern. A mathematical equation stands forever." "The release of atom power has changed everything except our way of thinking...the solution to this problem lies in the heart of mankind. If only I had known, I should have become a watchmaker." "Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously uses his intelligence." "The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed." "A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy, education, and social ties; no religious basis is necessary. Man would indeeded be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear of punishment and hope of reward after death." "The further the spiritual evolution of mankind advances, the more certain it seems to me that the path to genuine religiosity does not lie through the fear of life, and the fear of death, and blind faith, but through striving after rational knowledge." "Now he has departed from this strange world a little ahead of me. That means nothing. People like us, who believe in physics, know that the distinction between past, present, and future is only a stubbornly persistent illusion." "You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat." "One had to cram all this stuff into one's mind for the examinations, whether one liked it or not. This coercion had such a deterring effect on me that, after I had passed the final examination, I found the consideration of any scientific problems distasteful to me for an entire year." "...one of the strongest motives that lead men to art and science is escape from everyday life with its painful crudity and hopeless dreariness, from the fetters of one's own ever-shifting desires. A finely tempered nature longs to escape from the personal life into the world of objective perception and thought." "He who joyfully marches to music rank and file, has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice. This disgrace to civilization should be done away with at once. Heroism at command, how violently I hate all this, how despicable and ignoble war is; I would rather be torn to shreds than be a part of so base an action. It is my conviction that killing under the cloak of war is nothing but an act of murder." "A human being is a part of a whole, called by us _universe_, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest... a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty." "Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted counts." (Sign hanging in Einstein's office at Princeton) [Copyright: Kevin Harris 1995 (may be freely distributed with this acknowledgement)] ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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I disagree with #11 & #18.
Learning is stealing? There is never enough time it seems to me. |
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"Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds."
How true!!! |
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"He who joyfully marches to music rank and file, has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice. This disgrace to civilization should be done away with at once. Heroism at command, how violently I hate all this, how despicable and ignoble war is; I would rather be torn to shreds than be a part of so base an action. It is my conviction that killing under the cloak of war is nothing but an act of murder."
MadDog is going to PO'd at this one. Hey babe! |
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"Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds." How true!!! 'Unfortunate Reality' - Yes! |
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I disagree with #11 & #18. Learning is stealing? There is never enough time it seems to me. 'You are so very correct'! ![]() |
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"A human being is a part of a whole, called by us _universe_, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest... a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty." I have trouble wrapping my mind around this one. How can you love evil people or sadistic ones? |
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"A human being is a part of a whole, called by us _universe_, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest... a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty." I have trouble wrapping my mind around this one. How can you love evil people or sadistic ones? 'Perhaps our love/compassion/kindness will relieve 'them' of their 'vileness' ![]() |
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"John Lennon":
"You make your own dream. That's the Beatles' story, isn't it? That's Yoko's story . That's what I'm saying now. Produce your own dream. If you want to save Peru, go save Peru. It's quite possible to do anything, but not to put it on the leaders and the parking meters. Don't expect Jimmy Carter or Ronald Reagan or John Lennon or Yoko Ono or Bob Dylan or Jesus Christ to come and do it for you. You have to do it yourself. That's what the great masters and mistresses have been saying ever since time began. They can point the way, leave signposts and little instructions in various books that are now called holy and worshiped for the cover of the book and not for what it says, but the instructions are all there for all to see, have always been and always will be. There's nothing new under the sun. All the roads lead to Rome. And people cannot provide it for you. I can't wake you up. You can wake you up. I can't cure you. You can cure you." [John Lennon's Dream for the 80's] ![]() |
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"A human being is a part of a whole, called by us _universe_, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest... a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty." I have trouble wrapping my mind around this one. How can you love evil people or sadistic ones? 'Perhaps our love/compassion/kindness will relieve 'them' of their 'vileness' ![]() You know the snake story, right? I fed the snake, took care of him, loved him but he still bit me! Why? Because that's his nature. You cannot rehabilitate evil and sadistic people. They are a lost cause. |
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"A human being is a part of a whole, called by us _universe_, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest... a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty." I have trouble wrapping my mind around this one. How can you love evil people or sadistic ones? 'Perhaps our love/compassion/kindness will relieve 'them' of their 'vileness' ![]() You know the snake story, right? I fed the snake, took care of him, loved him but he still bit me! Why? Because that's his nature. You cannot rehabilitate evil and sadistic people. They are a lost cause. ![]() |
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I laugh at, and about, everything.
This trait, has a tendency to p!ss people off. ![]() |
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