I happen to believe that there are more elevated, consistent men like myself who will take our time with a woman. A lot of what i see from younger, more eager men is they see a profile or something they like and the first thing that pops into their heads is either begging for a number, skype chat, etc.
I have to ask myself have this generation completely lost the value of being patient? Of maybe saying something in a first message that starts with "excuse me for saying so, miss, but i just read your profile and it made me smile. would you mind talking to me so we can get to know eachother?"

It's gracious it's humble and at least it doesnt come off as (insert misogynistic or morally degrading first message here cuz im NOT repeating what i see in chatrooms)! lol

They say nice guys finish last. Sometimes that's true.

But I happen to believe that patience is still a good thing and something to be valued. we may be guys and masculine and wanting what we want....but sometimes our modes of operation don't work for every woman.

Kind of that age-old adage of if a girl finds out how you feel about her right away, she'll run away, be completely turned off or otherwise avoid you like a plague.

I'm sure it's happened to al of us at some point.

we also live in a day and age where more women are asking GUYS out first, which i think is nice to see and very progressive, but it really depends on the girl's approach, too. people respond to different levels of flattery in different ways.

But if some of us exercised a bit of restraint here and there, if more of us recognized ourselves as people who don't jsut fall into bed with just anyone, if we took the time to get to know a girl's mind, her habits, her heart and hobbies - and took those things into consideration before writing our first message to them, and if we see them for more than what's between their necks and their knees (pervs, lol) they'd be more willing to respond, and less willing to block us.

A womans heart is a very fickle thing sometimes, guys.
Learn patience, grow in your wisdom, regard them as human beings in need of the best representation of yourself as can be (but dont be too much of a pushover), and who knows? You might get lucky.
Patience pays off ladies and gents.

Stay classy!

Well said,on many levels.

Thanks! Oh, hey! Long time no see!

Back at ya!

I agree with you and it would be refreshing to see a "touch of class" between male and female interaction! It would be very pleasant and wonderful to say the least, in my humble opinion. Thumbs up for you!

I maintain that a lot (not all, but a lot) of the male profiles who go around trying to pick up women immediately, to get them on services like Skype, or to get their phone numbers, etc, are scammers or frauds. Very much like the female profiles who are scammers or frauds, and try to get males to text to a certain phone number, or go on Yahoo! Instant Messenger.
Because if these males are not scammers or frauds, I fear for the future of our species (my gender in particular), my sanity, and the typing skills of these latest generations.

Made you a new one, I see.
Glad you did,you are a good addition to the Mingle family
Intelligent thoughts..love reading you.

Saw a sparkly, didn't read it all.

I'll summarize for you. The author of the OP is a nice guy.

Good words of wisdom there ,I can relate to that from alot of women,some aren't really use to us having that much patience,I've even came off to some as not interested at times,and even been accused of,the "G"word lol ,and on the flip side,when I find someone I really think I like alot,I do like you said,I show to much interest to soon,and by me being such passionate and intense,and straight forward,I tend to chase them away lol,I don't know if it was a lack of patience,sometimes,not all the time,I did that,cause I don't often come in contact with those people often,but I've learned from that,and I don't do it anymore,so very nice topic!

Dude.....I dunno if you realize this or not but about 91% of women want their hair pulled. Be classy all you want but be ready to get that freak on and smack dat azz behind closed doors.

Preach!

I agree, very well said. The question my conscience is struggling to comprehend is why when you ladies know we are being patient and kind gentlemen we are shoved to the side. I have heard it all, 'you need to lower your standards, you need to be more aggressive, you need to be more assertive.'
I disagree. I NEED TO BE MYSELF. The biggest problem that I see is a lack of attention span. If I don't talk to. someone at least once a day, that's it. Done. Why? Because there are thousands of choices at their fingertips.
Remember the old saying I've got you wrapped around my finger? Now we have live streaming video, photos texts voice attached to their palms. Why SHOULD she wait for us good guys to get to know her when she's got fifty goons begging to take her out to dinner?
Aside from joining the gaggle of goons or becoming a pop-up joe stalker behind the bushes we have a very fine line to tread.

Maybe a classy freak lol?

There's always one. And just because we're gentlemen doesn't mean we can't out perform behind closed doors. I prefer knowing who and what I'm getting into.

That is the upper echelon....and some even think it is a myth.

I like patience in a man. To be wooed and someone who is persistent...thinks you are worth it. The time and the energy. Old fashioned is a quality you don't often see anymore. A true gentleman. Someone with the heart of a poet. Yes it is appreciated. Much better than the approach that i can only describe...as a bull in a china shop.

Do I sense a hint of jealousy? We aren't a myth, we're the exception to the rule. You don't have to be a complete a55 to be good in bed, please a woman or make her quiver. Some of our (men) consciences are louder than our libidos. That doesn't mean we have the sexual prowess of a three legged spider. Spend some time listening instead of blowing hot air all the time. If you're not attentive to a woman, her reactions, words, moans, whispers etc you're missing 80% of the pleasure she has to give.

One can display that approach and it will work with a few nice ladies. Unfortunately, many of the woman here think men want only intimate behaviour. In time one may meet someone, while others stop trying.

I think many of the sites you referred to above are directed towards people searching for intimate encounters. This site is caught between: religous, believers, non-religous, and people wanting initmate encounters, and maybe the occasional dollar.

Thank god one of you is aware of this

I had this very conversation with my "��guy"�� friend the other day. He was bitching because he thought he had this great first date and he emailed her for a second date and thought he chased her off by being too into her, contacting her too soon and too often. I am going to tell you what I told him. She just wasn't into you dude. Your are buying into the lie, she already had one foot out the door and the story you are being fed about you were too nice or too honest about your feelings or said too much too soon was just a line to protect your feelings. If she really liked you and wanted to see you again or wanted to continue the relationship, guess what? She would have. I challenge one woman to say they dumped a guy because he was too nice, patient, kind, interested, gracious or for being a gentleman or any of the reasons stated. I think it is just an excuse for men not to be nice guys.