100% FREE ONLINE DATING
sponsored links
Previous
| Topic: DOUBLE STANDARDS FOR MEN/WOMEN? | |
|---|---|
|
|
|
I believe men and women were made different, with different parts inside and out,,lol for a reason,, I think too often we see 'different' as inferior or superior and that's the problem a woman at home doing unpaid jobs is no more inferior or superior than a man in an office doing a paid job but to be 'equal' we felt like we had to be out at the office too and now we are expected to be,,,although the men are not expected on quite a large scale to be at home nurturing and looking after their kids,,, that's a double standard I hate has occurred and wish we were back to two parent households where a parent stayed home and the other works outside the home,,,, ,.,,,but I digress I do expect a male to be a gentleman in how he treats his family and his wife,,,,to protect and provide and cherish opening doors, sharing a coat, paying for meals ,,is part of the way cherishing someone can be manifested I expect of myself, as a female, to be lady in how I treat my family and husband, to nurture and support and cherish having a warm, safe, clean home and preparing healthy meals , as well as carrying children through to a healthy birth, giving (well earned) trust and respect to the husbands decisions, are all ways that cherishing husband and family can manifest I cannot tolerate an expectation to 'do it all',, working both inside and outside the home,, with a man who feels they should only be expected to bring home a check and be waited on,,, interesting that you raised this because one of my friend's at work, her husband stays home with their young kids and I think it's great! Break away from those double standards! But I wonder if she or he has encountered anyone who has made comments about him "not working to support his fam." Trust me, he IS working...lol the mom having to stay home (because men are more worthwhile in the marketplace) is the most destructive double standard after the sexual fidelity double standard in my opinon 
|
|
|
|
|
|
Edited by
msharmony
on
Sun 12/08/13 07:57 AM
|
|
I believe men and women were made different, with different parts inside and out,,lol for a reason,, I think too often we see 'different' as inferior or superior and that's the problem a woman at home doing unpaid jobs is no more inferior or superior than a man in an office doing a paid job but to be 'equal' we felt like we had to be out at the office too and now we are expected to be,,,although the men are not expected on quite a large scale to be at home nurturing and looking after their kids,,, that's a double standard I hate has occurred and wish we were back to two parent households where a parent stayed home and the other works outside the home,,,, ,.,,,but I digress I do expect a male to be a gentleman in how he treats his family and his wife,,,,to protect and provide and cherish opening doors, sharing a coat, paying for meals ,,is part of the way cherishing someone can be manifested I expect of myself, as a female, to be lady in how I treat my family and husband, to nurture and support and cherish having a warm, safe, clean home and preparing healthy meals , as well as carrying children through to a healthy birth, giving (well earned) trust and respect to the husbands decisions, are all ways that cherishing husband and family can manifest I cannot tolerate an expectation to 'do it all',, working both inside and outside the home,, with a man who feels they should only be expected to bring home a check and be waited on,,, interesting that you raised this because one of my friend's at work, her husband stays home with their young kids and I think it's great! Break away from those double standards! But I wonder if she or he has encountered anyone who has made comments about him "not working to support his fam." Trust me, he IS working...lol the mom having to stay home (because men are more worthwhile in the marketplace) is the most destructive double standard after the sexual fidelity double standard in my opinon
if you read closer, I said one parent should be home and the other work, I don't care which gender although I do think that in general , women are better created to do the nurturing because of the headstart they get bonding with children in childbirth and whoever is at home with the kids is 'working', in my opinion, I just used a woman as an example because I believe that is ideally the way its created to be
|
|
|
|
|
|
Edited by
sparkyae5
on
Sun 12/08/13 07:59 AM
|
|
Msharmony-well said- WATCH OUT FOR THE SHOULD'S --SHOULD'S ARE SH@T--
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Edited by
msharmony
on
Sun 12/08/13 08:00 AM
|
|
oh, I also don't tolerate 'mine/yours' when it comes to blended homes
the adults in the home are , at least, surrogate parents for ANY child in their home,, and all children should be abiding by the rules and anyone who slaps/kicks/punches/pushes anyone should expect to have the same back,, I think it sucks how much more stigma men get then women when it comes to physical behavior than vice versa.... |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I think double standards in a relationship can be either positive or negative depending on the circumstances. Some are necessary, some are ridiculous. Some I'd tolerate willingly and others I simply won't. Couple of examples...
Had an ex that liked to drink, but he complained if I drank. Seems like a clear case of a double standard. Not so. He could handle his booze but I couldn't. Better for us if I refrained. I accepted this and didn't see it as a double standard really, even though it sure looked like one from the outside. Same ex. We both smoked about a pack a day. He started 'monitoring' my cigarette consumption. 20 or less was fine. Somehow 21 or more meant I didn't love him anymore and I didn't hear the end of it for days on end. Hello! You're going to gripe about me smoking when you smoke too moron. Give me a friggen break. 
Those kinds of double standards...I can screw around but you can't, I can have friends but you can't, I can be overweight but expect you to be a swimsuit model  ...those are BS double standards and will get ya the boot before ya know what hit ya. Typically I go by "what's good for the goose is good for the gander". 
It's not always clear cut though, so I'm careful not to assume all double standards are unfair. We all have strengths and weaknesses and it's not always a bad thing to have different standards in the relationship based on individual needs. Sometimes what's good for the goose can be really detrimental for the gander, in which case it's probably best to have a double standard for the relationship's sake. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I think double standards in a relationship can be either positive or negative depending on the circumstances. Some are necessary, some are ridiculous. Some I'd tolerate willingly and others I simply won't. Couple of examples... Had an ex that liked to drink, but he complained if I drank. Seems like a clear case of a double standard. Not so. He could handle his booze but I couldn't. Better for us if I refrained. I accepted this and didn't see it as a double standard really, even though it sure looked like one from the outside. Same ex. We both smoked about a pack a day. He started 'monitoring' my cigarette consumption. 20 or less was fine. Somehow 21 or more meant I didn't love him anymore and I didn't hear the end of it for days on end. Hello! You're going to gripe about me smoking when you smoke too moron. Give me a friggen break.
Those kinds of double standards...I can screw around but you can't, I can have friends but you can't, I can be overweight but expect you to be a swimsuit model ...those are BS double standards and will get ya the boot before ya know what hit ya. Typically I go by "what's good for the goose is good for the gander".
It's not always clear cut though, so I'm careful not to assume all double standards are unfair. We all have strengths and weaknesses and it's not always a bad thing to have different standards in the relationship based on individual needs. Sometimes what's good for the goose can be really detrimental for the gander, in which case it's probably best to have a double standard for the relationship's sake. great points! different individual circumstances can lead to different standards that only SEEM like double standards,,,, |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
What would you consider a double standard that you would not tolerate in your relationship? Do double standards have any merit whatsoever? Would you continue in a relationship with double standards under certain circumstances or not? I would love to get your thoughts on these questions! Thanks for participating. 
women always have double standards. |
|
|
|
|
