I'm sittin on my laptop and thinkin to myself, if there really was a thing called a true love I'd like to think she would've found me by now. Jumpin into a relationship head first can sometimes leave a memorable bruise.

Jumpin into a relationship head first can sometimes leave a memorable bruise.

Still you could have a ball whilst waiting for that elusive 1

It's experience that's posting not low testosterone levels

That guy made me laugh today. I was talking to this girl earlier and I used elusive in a sentence. Man, the look she gave me was priceless. I don't know why I did it. I couldn't figure out why the old school jumped in on me like that in the first place. I guess when you have somethin to say you gotta say it. When it comes to girls I can't run my mouth like I'm trying to impress you. If I wanna impress someone i'll tell them to watch me play basketball or any sport if it came down to it. I'd rather invite a girl over and get started on quality time. A movie, some good eatz, and that awkward silence. Yea, That's a chill day.

I check out other posts and then I get this feeling. Why am I nervous?

Guess i'll make this my own little diary that people can read. I feel older than I really am, but is that a phase or what? I could be right where I need to be but I wanna be somewhere else. Where??? California of course. Nah, I just wish I could hangout with the guys like everybody else but the things the guys do together are lame. I don't think I'm better than anybody it's just that certain things come to me easier as a solo mission than it would in a crew. I'm not lonely or by myself I just wish I had a crew so we could do things that crews do together because meeting girls is something that I learned to do on my own. I don't even know what guys do together. I could say work out but my figure intimidates when it's go time. Next thing I know I'm workin out and there tired or just watchin me like i'm showin off or somethin. To be honest, that's why i'm not in a crew or have a couple of guys to hangout with. they made me feel like i was showin off and surnuff a girl would come along and shoot my ratings through the roof for showtime. Don't get me because I like attention. It's just that hater vibe I can't stand. Like I thought we were cool enough to hang out but it just looks like you wanted intel for a roast. That was basically me roaming the halls at school man. I had friends, but I really had... I don't even know what to call it. We were cool but i did my own thing. I got girls doin it but I was so bored. Im just bored all the time. Never expect a guy to change that though, cause it seems gay. Wanting something you don't want seems foolish.