I'd like some opinions please.

I'm separated. I've been separated for about 10 months now. My soon-to-be ex filed for divorce in December. There is no chance at reconciliation. Our attorneys are still going back and forth about several issues and I don't see this getting resolved anytime soon.

Now for my question. Since I'm not officially divorced would it be morally wrong of me to actually date? I still consider myself married and I worry what others would think of my seeing other people. Would they consider me a cheater? What about the man I choose to go out with? Would people see him as a cheater because he's going out with a married woman?

Please no bashing. I'm not looking for permission. I'm just looking for opinions and thoughts on the matter. What would you do?

no bashing, in the same boat.

I would date, but at this point, not sure if I want to get involved. I am not sure another man would want to get involved with me until things are settled.

As for NSA, that is the question. I am leading in that direction. I could do FWB, but don't have any male friends.

Good luck
and like the lady says, no bashing

people are going to see what they choose to see

, yes, some will consider it cheating
but others will not

bottom line is to be honest with any potential mate about your situation so they can decide for themselves based upon how they feel about seperations

I think honesty is the best that can be expected of you,,,

If a person is "legally" separated, then they are free to date. Imo
Many times couple separate and go back together. Separation means you are still legally married until you are divorced. Imo
People have different views on morals. I was "legally" separated for months before my divorce.

Whether or not it is permissible for you to date depends on the standard that you use to determine right from wrong.

Everyone is different and looks at the situation different.. Myself when my ex and I split I knew it was for good.. And yes I started dating right after I filed for Divorce which was three months after I told him to pack his bags and leave....

But now myself I will not date a guy that is separated and has not made any moves on getting a Divorce. I feel like one should at least get the ball rolling and dissolve the prior relationships before beginning a new one..

But if that does not bother either one in the relationship then do as they please... I'm not here to judge anyone on their choices... I just know that does not work for me....

Been there tried that with one that was still married & separated, but evidently he had no intentions of getting a divorce...

You go with what is comfortable with you and all else does not matter...

i was legally seperated from my wife....i did not date but well hired an escort to "do the laundry".after an extended argument my ex 2 b did actually agree that even though she hated me even more than ever i did have the right to see others-for whatever reasons.
i myself believe that you have the right to do as you wish.i actually think if you dont allow for other feelings or developments to take root your divorce will likly just get uglier..if on the other hand you rely on the government to lay down the groundrules you will notice im sure that the options are single married separated divorced widowed..I BELIEVE IF YOU WISH TO HEAR THAT YOU ARE A CHEATER IF YOU DATE OR.......you should hang around with judgemental narrow minded unhappy people who tend to give more credence to popular opinion than personal freedoms.i wonder if having just gotten out of the fire you may find it easier to spot the same mistake again vs forgetting the bad to sieze the moment..possible this doesnt make sense but thats whats nice about opinions they are just so ignorable....best wishes i believe you giving it more than a second thought shows an admirable quality i believe many dont have

It is risky to date separated people, as you might grow feelings and then they might get back together.

I am leery of it.

bottom line is to be honest with any potential mate about your situation so they can decide for themselves based upon how they feel about seperations

I think honesty is the best that can be expected of you,,,

voted as best advice...well put

Thank you all for the feedback. I don't harbor any resentments or bitterness. I don't hate my ex. He's a good man but we're not compatible for many reasons. We always were better friends than lovers.

I guess I'll go with my gut. Should the opportunity present itself I will decide how I feel at the time and act based on that.

Love you Minglers. What a great bunch of folks.

under no circumstances do I consider it cheating when HE has filed for a divorce and it is in the works....I was definitely hittin' on the cutie down the street before the ink was dry m'self...lol

honestly tho to me it sounds like YOU are not sure that you are ready to date and that is the issue. Are you ready? And will the kind of man you really want be willing to get involved with someone who is still technically married.

I know I'd hesitate on that one...

Often just after divorce it's best to have some chill time...me time ....make some male friends and kinda take things light....fun...but no serious relationship drama as u have enuff other stuff goin' on right now

just my thoughts....as I was exactly where you are right now several yrs ago

agree - I don't date them either

By past experences, I wouldn't fool with a lady until the divorce was finalized. You just don't know for sure.

u can date...but if he cheats u ,then u can be...