that is probably true. fairly obvious, though, without needing to be stated as it is off topic

perhaps you would like to start your own thread from that perspective. it could be quite interesting and lively!!!

thank you ;)

handsome furry devils always get off topic

I merely replied to your inquiry.

your convrsation with me on the matter with me is over at this time.

Yes.

lol....hahaha :)


exceptions are out there

but in essence, yes

Thank you.
They did. Divorce was not a consideration for them. I've tried to treat any woman I've met in my life that way. Some, I think didn't know how to handle that about me. A few accused me of having a hidden agenda. Its their loss, I guess.

nah

you don't strike me as the hidden agenda type


I did not consider it an option either - it was my ex's family that was mostly made up of divorce- to them it's as common as purslane in an old field...I don't have much respect there

while in my extended fam, divorce is rare and very taboo

but I do understand he picked it up from them

so it's a tough old shoe... may not like it, but don't always have much choice

hey - where are u - everbody's looking atcha??? lol

Where all adaptable, we do not mold! We form but forever change.
My dad was working class out of Liverpool England staring a trade a 14 and back in the late 60s
early 70s he'd come home from work and the kids better be in bed and the dinner better be on the table.
and thats how it was in all the households.
In about 82 they'd built there dream house which had a dishwasher and my dad always loaded the
dishwasher and did the groceries on a Saturday, now at that time it was a recession so thats probably
Why he started doing it, as his motto was always "son if you want something done right, then you
better G*d dam bloody well do it yourself then" its better than comming down on your wife.
As the chain brakes, yes so he also started vacuuming and sucking d*ck just kidding dad..lol
a think the groceries was to shop smarter. Back then I think he just loved it cuz he could meet lots of people and flirt with woman I hope..lol
So half way through school canada adopted the metric system then Dad went
from this guy that the only muscle he ever lifted in the house was the one between
his legs to the toughest SOB in a dress with a real bad attitude.
so this stuff just F*...me right up so now I live alone & slap my own face when I walk
in the door and the dinner not on the table

marry a good cook

as for me? no plans to marry at all

I don't believe age matters I have friends who have been together since our teenage years. I believe its all about the mate and If they are truly your soul mate.

thanks

I guess that can be true for some......I still think men closer to my age and older have a greater expectation that a woman is going to "wait" on them tho (in personal lives only I am speaking of)

but it is becasue of how we were raised - not because they are not good people

I treat my woman with equal partnership, a far cry from my parents (dad = abusive authoritarian). I think it is made by conscious choices to be a particular way.

that's great!

I think a relationship stands a much better chance if the partners actively "manage" that equality equation rather than allowing themselves to lapse into learned patterns (especailly if those patterns were not all that functional)

I'm hovering right up close to age 50, and from what I've seen most men in my age bracket really don't expect a woman to wait on them. A few might come off that way now and then, but if the woman in their life says, "Hey, make your own sandwich and clean up that mess," they'll do it because their mother most likely taught them properly.

As for decision-making in relationships, authoritarianism and other aspects... I think it depends as much on personality and on what a given individual saw modeled in their own family whilst growing up as upon age or generation. My dad had an authoritarian streak (to put it mildly) but at other times he and my mom had an egalitarian relationship. So I grew up very confused about what constituted a "normal" or healthy relationship because the model kept changing, and I had to figure it out on my own by trial and error in adulthood.

I think the same thing is true for many guys, especially in my age cohort and those a bit younger. Shifting societal expectations have created a landscape in which the road markers are a bit blurred and people have to try to create a new model that works in the modern world.

THIS.

role expectations are more fluid now I agree but that could be a good thing. Confusing perhaps but confusion often presents an opportunity to learn. Perhaps it is healthier to have choices and "negotiate" those with a partner than to have our roles dictated to us by societal expectations

Yep, exactly!

Maturity is the #1 predictor of how they will treat you. They can be mature at any age. They can be immature at any age.

I look for men who hold to their responsibilities. Who work hard at their job. Who maintain their friendships. Who take care of their kids (if they have them). Who take care of their pets esp. bull dogs. Who take care of their aging parents. Etc. etc.