One of my friends has a lot of "closed-door issues" with her husband. They know that bringing up these issues will lead to heated debates and arguments. Texas Soundrel talked about this in his post..It reminds me of the gridlock and "standstills" that go on in Congress today..I'm glad that my husband and I found ways to discuss things openly and worked to find compromises when need be..It's no fun to live in a potential "war zone" with hidden field mines all over the place.

I can relate with that. It can be addictive to just retaliate. In a prior marriage retaliating was how we communicated.

Don't talk to a woman that is putting on her mascara.
Don't talk to a woman when she is doing the dishes.
Don't talk to a woman when she is taking a shower.
Don't talk to a woman when she is on the phone.
Blah blah... excuses....women multitask... if we didn't all you dudes would not have gotten the care and protection it took for you to even still be here.
p.s. favorite porn star?? It's an image.... not the real thing...I will never understand how that is even an option. Your woman should be your favorite thing.

I was in a couple of relationships that could be toxic in the past..It becomes a game of "tit for tat" and emotional blackmail. And things can sure get ugly. YUK!...I think it takes a certain level of maturity to avoid playing "gotcha games" in relationships. Don't you?...Some couples act like brothers and sisters who are stuck in perpetual sibling rivalry...There's too much competition. (Versus caring and sharing and working through problems as best-best friends.)

Nice wish to have, but it aint gonna happen.
The male species will never give up on their porn star fantasies.
It's useless to try to change that.

As long as women fantasize about being porn stars . . .

The only thing I fantasize about...is eating as much as I want and not getting fat.

there's always the no sex for you option

I could not be compatible with a man who even thinks porn is normal or who even consider getting physical with some who has had sex with 20,000 people....on film no less

I think it works both ways. (For men and women.)...Our partners aren't "things" or our "possessions." Nobody wants to be "talked at" when they are concentrating on something or watching a favorite show or movie..Constant interruptions can be annoying and disrespectful...It's unfair to expect our mate to drop everything and be "on call" for us 24/7...This is how young kids act with their parents and they have to be taught to respect other peoples' boundaries.

good list - can we add when she is cooking dinner while talking on the phone? only so much multi tasking can be expected....

I think there was a show called the Toxic Avenger. This thread may explain how he got that name.

why???
Because people take each other's company for granted.
Because they haven't learned to appreciate what they've got.
Simple.

I know.... this is why I am single. F that.

I agree. both ways.... yes.

Exactly... I can and do whatever porn stars do.... I am REAL. They are an image on a screen.
so why use porn....I hate this freaking topic.

Girl? You can add about 5 more things and I'd be doing them at once.
I can water the garden, do laundry, wash dishes, cook dinner, answer the front door, while on the phone, with a baby on my hip, and caring for another 2 children in the other room. What now? lol

The hard part is even being friendly towards each other after a while. She said she didn't like the 'tit for tat'. Early on she said she was worried that she was changing me. She said she had trouble with letting go of control. It is understandable because she was a survivor. She had survived incredible odds. It made me look at 13th stepping in a whole new light. I have been sober and clean for 29 years but even though she had 25 years went back out again. When her sponsor was the go between I was asked if I was going to stay for the meeting. I said 'No'. I wasn't about to come between her relationship with her sponsor. If I had said'yes' I know she would have left the meeting. I always want the hand of A.A. to be there even if it isn't my hand.

Because the way a woman looks is extremely important to men and women just don't take care of themselves in this part of the world. Many of us would prefer a thin, young fantasy to a real, overweight willing partner.

Good for you for caring about her welfare and well-being.

This is definately how Many Men think!