People always say that it's not a good idea to go grocery shopping with an empty stomach. (When we're starved in other words!)...Supposedly we're more inclined to "grab anything" or buy too much if we shop when we're hungry..I think this probably applies to relationships too. Don't you?...Have you run into people who seem "needy" and desperate for love?

I think if someone is looking for a relationship just because they're lonely and unhappy, it's a bad idea.

I made that mistake and settled for a guy that just used me, cheated on me, and in general treated me like crap.

Some people have dated someone simply because they're lonely and that never works. If you want to date, please make sure you are doing it for the right reasons. (You in a general sense, not you specifically lol)

I agree. You don't need a relationship to complete you; you need one to complement you.

Every time that I visit this site's "New Members Welcome Area".

Is the thread title one of those clever analogies that actually mean something totally different? Either way, it would be yes to both. I always make sure I eat before going somewhere. As much as I always make sure I use the bathroom before going anywhere. I can never watch a cooking show without it making me hungry. As far as needy men asking me out, it happens regardless. As long as I make it clear I'm in a relationship, if I am at the time, then they get that I'm not interested. Certain one's can be a bit forceful, but that's when it's time to pretend you're phoning the police if he doesn't go away.

Really good analogy Greeneyes....Really good!...I always buy the wrong thing(s) if I shop when I'm too hungry and/or too needy......Caveat Emptor!

Yes, I have and they can be persistent and annoying in my experience.

Kind of like that "If you are not completely satisfied after your 30 day trial, then send it back and receive a full refund" type deal. People want to sample the goods knowing that if they don't like it they can always send it away and gain there single status back.

PERFECT! Greeneyes....makes all the sense in the world to me.....BUT now I really need everyone's help...I am not needy....but I am lonely....I am self-supporting....live alone.....have a 3/4 filled bucket and all that's missing to me is someone to share with ...and snuggle ...you all know...the physical contact....so that I guess makes me needy also????? what do I do...it's been a really long time since I've been alone....touched...held...and I hate it....I keep myself as busy as can be but still go to bed alone and wake up alone...so how do I get rid of that sense of not needing...but wanting a man in my life....I've tried...and still a few days a week...I feel it...and almost feel like paying someone at times..just to hold me...OMG! is that horrible.....the loneliness is a killer....and I don't know if I'll ever get used to it..it's not the first time I've been alone in my life so it's not something I haven't experienced...but it was always a different time in my life...at my age now and my kids all being gone and grown....I'm retired young....now is when I really have the time to enjoy ...life and a partner to share with.....

shareahug...I'm sorry you're so lonely and alone. I am too! Everyone in my entire family died. (Including my husband and both my sons.)...I feel like I'm going through a bleak and barren Winter. (With no signs of "life" or Spring on the horizon!)...I never expected to end-up "all alone" like this. I wasn't prepared...Everything rests on my shoulders now. I have to develop "street smarts" and make wise decisions so I won't end-up in a "kettle of fish!" (As my Mom used to say!)...I can't let my loneliness or my "neediness" get the "best" of me and take control. (Or I might end-up swimming around with some slippery eels or smelly fish!)

if there s one thing i hate in a person...its "needy."


oh dear god i just can't take it

its like having a fungus among us!!!!

I know I am very needy, for a bag of cheetos, not for a man.

I have met a lot of women who wanted long-term committed relationships, even marriage, on the first date. I always put this down to my incredible good looks and sparkling personality. This is a need I do not understand, to me it is a want, we all may want that. A need is something like the times I accidently have a one night stand.

Well said

The OP is totally true. Story of my life for about 20 years, actually, until I permanently ran out of luck. Bounce from one man to another, couldn't be without anyone because it was just too painful. You don't make good choices AT ALL that way, and what's more, if you do it more than a couple of times you kind of get hooked on it and don't even know any better. The only reason I stopped was when my heart got broken so bad that I couldn't even think about the male half of the species for about 5 years.

Shareahug, I know exactly what you mean. I was just telling someone that the desire for love and affection never goes away, no matter how long you've been without it. You just have to start focusing on other things that are pleasant in your life. But you are actually in the perfect place in your life to find somebody--just try to be creative about where those guys might be.

Bravalady...I agree. The need for love and affection never goes away...When I studied Child Development in college we learned about babies who died in orphanages back in the old days due to lack of love and attention and "bonding" etc...The infants were fed and had their diapers changed etc. (But that was it!) They weren't touched or talked to in personal ways and some ended-up dying. (Sad!)...When I feel hug-deprived and alone and forgotten (at times) I think about those infants!...This is when I pick up the phone and call a friend or force myself to get out among people...Or I give all my cats hugs and special attention. They love it and I do too!

Well said

GJ

Everybody thinks & shall think about themselves first,
if somebody don't,
most probably they would feel latter as if been cheated by entrusting someone
if one don't do that too,
people don't hesitate destroying such people.

God made human beings as a social animal;given them less muscle power but great mental power ,they can't survive w/o each other,what ever you think of yourself...if you are a human being...you are completely dependent on society...it's true!

If someone acquires all the wealth on the globe by killing everyone...what would he earn?

More or less,every human being is hungry,thirsty & needy for love....whether you think so or not,doesn't matter.

The best way to spend this human life safely in today's world is that think about your self & care about others.