The biggest insights I got from these forums, not just on this site, but on others as well, is that my opinion of people is very often wrong, and I can put in my place and humbled if I am really asking for it.

That always surprises me. I am even starting to accept that to have faith, one can believe in a higher being which has qualities that are darn right impossible in and by themselves.

So I am learning that my strong beliefs have an equal and opposite existence in the spectrum of beleived knowledge by the self. This also means that in one way it is possible that all that I know, beleive in, stand for, and am willing to fight for, are wrong and completely out of whack. To have learned that, is refreshingly frightening.

Another thing I learned to accept is that a sense of humour is independent of IQ. That was kind of surprising too, but it's true.

And lastly, which I am still having troubles with, is learning that looks have nothing to do with a person's character, dependability, likability, brains, sense of humour, loyalty, goodness. This is really, but really hard to take, as I see that good looking women get more replies and responses to their posts than less good looking women. Heck, even the guy here who poses fantasy girls with angel wings gets more responses than a lesserly good looking woman. Or a woman who puts in a cute stick-figure, or a beautiful painting for a personal pic, gets a hundred times more responses than a woman who puts in no picture or the picture of an animal, say a cat or an orangutang.

This phenomenon makes men look frighteningly predictable. They don't need reality to get turned on to a woman, any sort of reality, they just need some good visuals. Even if the visual is obviously not reality, a fantasy good visual is a million times better than no visual or a bad visual.

I am no exception. I make no bones about it, like even this post is made in response to what I believe is the best looking woman on these forums.

So, what I learned is that men depend too much on looks to start up trust and liking, and women tend to follow up on this, but I think they are just imitating men, they are not into that that much. *IMPORTANT* those who think it's a sexist statement that makes men more valuable than women, please don't. Women imitate men in this, but men imitate women, too. We both imitate features of the other gender. Stating that alone does not mean at all that I would subscribe to the superiority of one gender over the other.

What I also learned is that I can get humbled, despite my apparent and true personality of narcissism and high competitiveness. (These two traits are not the sum total of my personality. There are other features to it. For instance, I can scratch my itch, and I can eat a slice of Italian chocolate ice cream cake.)

What I also learned is that anyone can be funny, regardless of IQ, looks, gender, place of origin, marital status, etc.

What I also learned is that my strong beliefs in my values and weltanschauung can be pushed over just the same way as I see myself push over others' worlds. I just haven't matched the person to do it for me yet, that's all.

hmmmmmmmmmmmm..........maybe once or twice