I had a lunch date at a popular resturant in a upscale neighborhood. Time crunched I still made a special effort to look nice, ect. and evidently so did my companion. We had barely ordered our meal when at a near by table a toddler started fussing and escalated into a full blown ear pierceing shreiking tirade that just went on and on. The parent made no effort to pacify the child past giving up her cell phone which was quickly thrown to the floor. She then ordered her meal and seemingly oblivious to the situation as was whoever was actually in charge or the resturant. Even more annoying was the fact that so to was my dinner companion who heartly ate his meal and occassionally tried to talk over the din. I am wondering what would have been a graceful exit from this?

it was a tough situation you had there,facing insensitive people are really annoying. Maybe ask to change the table will work?

If I wasn’t able to converse with my date over the noise, I also would have changed tables.

I do this all the time if I don't like the seating arrangements or if I'm sitting next to overly noisy adults and/or children. Yes, sometimes the person or people that I’m with do think I’m making a fuss or perhaps being intolerant but the way I see it is that I'm paying for my meal just like everyone else in the restaurant, why shouldn't I enjoy the experience.

The only time, I wouldn't change tables would be if I've gone to a place that caters more to children/young people than adults. Or if the date wasn’t going so well and the noise was a welcome distraction.

This.

If you payed for a table, you expect a certain amount of service and atmosphere. I am honestly surprised the restaurant did not ask the parent to control their child or to leave. Most will do that vs. the risk of losing other patrons.

Nice restaurant, upscale neighborhood, special effort to look nice...Sounds like the two of you really wanted to share some quality time If I had been in your position I would have leaned in real close to my date, pointed my finger at the offending table while baring my teeth and growled loudly...."I'm sorry but I can't hear a word you are saying thanks to that rude biotch and her nasty little brat! Would you mind if I ask the waiter to move us to another table?".....Doing this will also give your date a little insight into your true personality!!!

I wonder when resenting giving over the world to inconsiderate people is somehow a negative reflection on a person? Be different if this was a kiddie resturant but it wasn't. Most of the diners there were in business suits or clothes that one would not expect to have to clean off the seat just to sit down.

I never saw fit to to impose any of my cranky toddlers on other diners; even at McDonald's. And yes a few times I paid and left a perfectly good meal on the table to pacify a child in the quiet of a bathroom, a parking lot, or took them home. Or actually budgeted an occassional dependable sitter.

Had it been my invitation I think I would have asked for another table, passed a sizeable tip to effect it immediately, but I was surprised the gentleman would tolerate this kind of drama. Groweling, pointing, or calling names is not my style. Not returning to a resturant that allows such abominal behavior; however, is.

I am wondering why my date did not find it offensive. I wonder if we are not just getting used to being bullied by the general public and if businesses are not being made to knuckle under to such abusive customers from false litigation.

Well Pacific I was joking about the growling thing and maybe I should not have made light of the situation...In all honesty, I think a guy who just sits there doing nothing is a guy who sees it as the norm...It is not the norm and I don't think people are getting used to rude behavior in public, I think people are just afraid to do anything...Even diciplining your child in public can get you a visit from the child protection agency if someone takes offense....

That may be it.

But there is little or no chance of a child being removed from a parents custody simply for being removed from a crowded resturant, theater, grocery or any place they can clearly not cope with except maybe for essential services such as emergency care or a court date.

Yea maybe if they are useing extream corporal punishment of screamiong at a kid but that doesn't work anyway.

I really believe at least 50% of children throwing tantrums is learned behavior. the parents haven't a clue how to manage the kids they have and when tey get fed up they throw tantrums themselves.

It is really more theroy, that I have not felt needed tested, but my feeling is that if my children were well rested, fed, and had a reasonable amount of accomodation they were relative calm or could be calmed down most of the time with occasional interventions rather than just ignoreing them. I frequently took them into the public and they behaved well because they knew if they didn't they would be removed and it wasn't because I made every place home away from home either. I just did not wait until they were straving or exhausted before I took them to a resturant or other public venue.

As far as I could tell the child having a tantrum was either sick or over tired and the Mom didn't have a diaper bag or anything to nibble or sip while they waited almost 45 minutes for food. Not to mention it was in a crowded busy resturant with all kinds of stimulateing things to be and attractive nusiance to a child. Why a parent would set themself up for failure like that, taking a toddler to lunch in a peak time hour, kind of amazed me. Seemed a very unrealistic expectation.

I don't think I would look down on the guy, he may have been trying to impress and therefore not wanting to make a scene... First dates are hard for both sides...

If it were me and I was annoyed at the situation I would have asked for a different table, if he didn't like it oh well but he would know what I'm about....

Yes that thought crossed my mind too. He knows at one time I had kids that had special needs and may have been trying to make the point of he would make the best out of a bad situation. One thing about situations like that there are few really winning answers.

While I am not big on gambleing or alcohol I am however seeing the advantage to adults only environments occassionally. LOL the heck of that is you risk having to deal with adults acting even worse than children.

I have thought a lot about that Mother; wheater she really felt she had any alternatives. You try to cancel and order in a busy resturant now days you are more than likely going to get a horrendous bill and probably going to be stuck with a to go charge for a foam plate that will collasp to boot. Come to think of it I don't remember seeing a children's menu. I have still never figured out why single serving milk water bottles don't have readily available "nipple" tops. Thank God at least with access features we are not still dragging baby strollers up stairs.

Hummm as many restaurants that I have worked at I'm really surprised that the manager did not ask her to step out with the child till she calmed down or offer to place her meal to go on the house...

There is nothing more annoying then people that cannot control their kids in a public area when around others.


But in no way would I think he should have done something if I was not even willing to say something myself...

^^This.

Well the date was his invitation so I tend to let someone who makes the invitation control the situation with in limits.

I wonder how men feel in that situation. Do they want their date to just deal or say something? My experience is men generally don't appreciate the woman taking over.

Had it been my invitation I would have ask for a table reassignment or suggested eating ours take out in a park rather than tolerateing the little banshee.

I am with you TxsGal I was surprised the manager didn't step in. I saw several people abandon their meals. Have to say I would think twice before accepting and invite to the same resturant again. Not going to ditch dateing someone over one uncomfortable date. If it were a habit yeat that might get old.

I would just ask for a different table. If your date is embarrassed I would explain to him, it's hard to talk over the noise and you want to get to know him.