Ep 1

The ambulance and police had gone now. The woman, a next door neighbour had died within his warm arms as the cat looked on sadly.
About an hour later, Charly heard a knock upon her door.

“Stay here Queeny,” he said to the moggy before checking out the door.

When he opened it, he saw a middle-aged bloke with long grey beard and wearing a multi coloured poncho.

“Can I help you?”

The stranger turned and smiled.

“I was looking for Sadie actually.”

“You had better come inside. I am afraid there is bad news.”

The stranger sat in the lounge as Charly recounted the tragic events. When he reached the part about the missing bathtub the stranger looked at him strangely.

“It can’t be missing. We only used it last weekend.”

“That is what the CID officer told me. You see, I had assumed that she had fallen inside and scolded herself. What with those awful burns.”

“Someone must have stolen it.”

“I rather doubt that,” Charly replied. “People would have seen it.”

The stranger shook his head.

“She spent a grand on that. Chinese ceramic you see. Damn thing weighed a ton.”

“How old was it?”

The stranger thought.

“According to the antiques dealer around three-hundred.”

“Pretty old then.”

“Sadie loved old stuff,” the stranger whispered.

“I am curious though,” Charly admitted.

“About the missing part. So am I. You don’t suppose the pigs nicked it?”

Charly shook his head.

“They are not allowed to mate. How do you fancy talking to that dealer?”

“What good would that do?”

“He may be able to tell us more about her purchase. We have to start somewhere. Something feels wrong about this.”

“Turning detective are we?” the stranger asked.

Charly smiled.

“There is more to that than you can possibly realise. Fancy staying the night?”

The stranger nodded and put out his hand.

“I’m Grant by the way.”

Charly introduced himself. A little late perhaps.

After a dismal breakfast, the new friends made their way to ‘Times of Old’ and found the grey haired proprieter sweeping up.

“Had an accident?” Grant asked.

“Just getting rid of the cobwebs sir. Wait a moment, I know you.”

“Ceramic bathtub?” Grant suggested.

“Yes indeed.”

“Can you give us some background info?” Charly asked.

“What do you want to know?”

“Where it was made would be nice.”

The proprieter smiled.

“Northern China. Legend says a mystic conjured it.”

Charly glanced at Grant.

“A mystic?”

“So the story goes. You see, this mystic was rather evil and designed the tub to destroy good. All rubbish of course.”

“Quite right too,” Grant said quickly.

“How can a tub destroy good?” Charly asked.

The proprietor walked to the heavy wooden counter and said, “By boiling them of course.”

Outside the shop, both men were deeply worried.

“There can’t be anything to that.”

“I saw the burns Grant. Problem is how do we locate the ruddy thing?”

“You think it moved by itself?”

“How else? Whoever has it now is in grave danger.”

“We better not go to the cops about this,” Grant said. “We would be locked away.”

“I agree with you. What do you reckon?”

Grant smiled and pointed to the newsagent window.

“How about putting up an advert?”

Ep 2

As the sun went down that night, a hard working mother of two was preparing the ceramic bathtub for use. As it filled with the warm water, she poured in her favourite scent. Stripping slowly, she dipped her foot in and realised it was just right.
She slid down, her smooth body being covered in the frothy bubbles. She started washing slowly, as the temperature started to rise. As it did so, the room filled with steam.

After a few minutes, she realised that it was rather too hot for her taste and turned the cold water tap. The water suddenly bubbled around her, skin slewing off in the heat, hellish screams drifting through the still air.

The DI gazed at the severely burnt body that was still and silent upon the bathroom floor. The doctor stood slowly.

“That’s the second this week Percy. No water, no bath even.”

“It certainly is peculiar sir.”

“She died from first degree burns,” the doctor said. “Though how? I have no idea.”

As he left the scene, the DI scratched his head.

“The front door is bolted, no sign of forced entry, and she burns to death.”

Percy looked at his superior.

“Black magic do you think?”

The DI stared in disbelief.

“I am really beginning to wonder. None of this makes any sense.”

“What do we tell the press?” Percy asked.

The DI shrugged his shoulders.

“How about cause unknown. That should keep them off our backs for a while.”

That evening, Grant returned with the paper.

“You had better read the headline.”

Charly did so and winced.

“Death undetermined. Sounds like another victim.”

“It happened three miles from here,” Grant said. “Surely she would have noticed the new bath.”

“Perhaps it can disguise itself. Who knows.”

“So what the hell do we do now?”

“Any response from your advert?”

Grant shook his head.

“Not a whimper. We daren’t go to the cops.”

“I think we should you know,” Charly said. “They may take us seriously.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Two missing bath’s? Come on. CID are not that daft. They know that something crazy is going on.”

The DI stared across the simple table of the interview room, staring as Charly outlined what he knew. After a pause he folded his arms and said, “Quite outlandish sir. Who was the evil magician? Merlin?”

“He was Welsh, not Chinese. Explain the missing bath’s then.”

Percy strode over.

“Who says they are missing?”

“The officers who collected the body from my hall of course.”

“They were only joking,” the DI said.

“At a crime scene?”

“It’s how we cope mate,” Percy said.

“I don’t believe a word of it,” Charly replied. “You lot know I’m right.”

“You say the antique dealer told you this?” Percy asked.

“He doesn’t believe the story either,” Charly admitted.

“Sounds like an intelligent man to me,” the DI said. “Look sir, nothing you have said convinces me.”

“Then how do you explain the two deaths? Accident?”
Percy glanced at his boss.

“At present,” he said. “That is precisely how we are handling it.”

The interview was over and Charly found himself outside the station staring at Grant.

“See they let you out then.”

“Don’t you start,” Charly said. “One thing though. They look damn worried.”

“So they should be mate. I got a call by the way.”

“Who from?”

“Some occultist who spotted the add. He wants to see us now.”

“So what are we waiting for. Let’s go see him.”

The taxi took them across town and stopped outside a fancy townhouse. Their host lived upon the ground floor and when he answered, Charly was quite shocked. The occultist wore a black cloak and sported a jet beard.

“Please enter of your own free will.”

The gents entered a quaint, if dark sitting room. A round table dominated and the chairs had carvings of angels upon them.

“Quite a set up,” Grant commented.

“I like it. Please have a seat.”

Once they were comfortable, Charly asked, “How can you help us exactly?”

“I specialise in tracking down evil. Your bathtub was indeed created by a magi.”

“You have done some digging?”

“Indeed I have. What your dealer forgot to say was that the magi was killed by his own creation.”

“Then what happened to it?” Grant asked.

The occultist raised his bushy eyebrows.

“Then it vanished from history.”

“Until now,” Charly said.

“Indeed.”

“You can track this thing?”

“All evil leaves a trace,” the occultist explained. My crystal pendulum should find it easily enough.”

Charly looked disappointed.

“I was hoping for something more.”

The occultist produced the pendulum from his cloak and they watched as he fired a question.

“Where doth evil lie?”

The small crystal moved upon the gold chain until it indicated an easterly position.

“It’s that way?” Grant asked.

“Towards the station to be precise. Now we take its advice.”

Standing outside now, the group finally reached the station and the strange man asked another question.

“Where doth evil wait?”

This time the device swung north and when they followed, Charly spotted a small stone cottage.

“We seem to have arrived,” the occultist whispered.

Ep 3

“Who’s going to knock?” Grant asked.

“That is not our main problem,” Charly replied. “How do we end this tub’s reign of terror?”

The occultist put away his trusty pendulum and drew out a silver crucifix.

“This should do the trick. I just toss it inside the damn thing and it should crack asunder.”

“That is enough?” Grant asked.

“I certainly hope so,” the occultist replied. “That is the only plan that I have. We cannot exactly ask its creator to undo it.”

Charly reached the yellowing front door and rapped twice. A moment later, an elderly lady wearing a shawl and holding a walking stick opened it.

“Can I help you,” her trembling voice asked.

The occultist smiled serenely.

“Have you recently gained a Chinese ceramic bathtub mam?”

The pensioner shook her head.

“I’m rather old fashioned,” she explained. “I still use my mom’s metal one.”

“Mind if we take a look?” Grant asked.

“Whatever for?”

“We believe there is a health risk mam. Bugs you know,” the occultist told her.

“Bugs? What type of bugs?”

Charly thought quickly.

“Ones that cause vomiting mam. A two minute test should be enough.”

“You don’t look like environmental officers,” the pensioner pointed out.

The occultist suddenly waived two fingers across her eyes and whispered, “We are old friends.”

The protests stopped and the woman stepped into the lounge. The occultist glanced at his shocked companions.

“Old trick you know. She was getting rather tedious.”

As they stepped inside, the lady closed the door.
The friends glanced at the neat little room and made their way towards the rear hall. At the far end they entered the water closet, and stared at the happy metallic tub.

“It’s not the one we are looking for,” Grant pointed out.

Charly would have none of it.

“It’s disguised. Now throw that ruddy cross.”

The occultist tossed the Christian symbol and waited for the tub to shatter. When naught happened, their faces fell.

“Your pendulum has not worked,” Grant said. “Now what the hell do we do?”

The occultist leaned forward and peered inside the tub. His shocked face told them everything.

“It melted it.”

Charly peeked and saw the cross had indeed been subjected to a terrible heat. The cross beam now lay shrivelled and curled.

“We should get it out of here,” the occultist suggested. “That woman is a sitting duck.”

As they started to lift the killer tub from the floor, the room filled with a strong smell of sulphur. From the lounge, the pensioner croaked, “Is everything alright?”

The friends coughed and spluttered as the temperature of the tub rose sharply.

“We got to let go,” Grant said. “My hands are burning.”

Moments later, the bath clattered to the floor as the heat became unbearable. They stepped back as the metal surface turned a dark red.

“Damn thing is alive,” Charly said.

“A quick withdrawel is required.” The occultist advised. “Everyone out now.”

As they reached the hall, real flames shot toward the ceiling, scorching it at once.

“Run for it!” Charly shouted dashing into the lounge.

He grabbed the startled woman and ushered her out into the street. Moments after his friends joined them, the lovely stone cottage went up in flames.

“Let’s hope that is the end of it,” Grant said.

“I’m afraid not,” the occultist said. “What we have seen is a demonstration of absolute evil.”

“In a nutshell?” Charly asked.

“It has escaped,” he whispered grimly.
 
Ep 4

As the cottage burned, they left the confused woman staring at the inferno. Making their way back to the rail station, Grant was incandescent with rage.

“So much for your plan. Where the hell has it gone too?”

“My plan was not at fault,” the occultist said. “We simply underestimated our enemy. As for its new location. Well, I thought that was obvious.”

“What does that mean?” Charly asked.

“Supreme evil tends to gravitate towards supreme good. In this town, that means one place.”

“The monastery,” Grant gasped.

“Exactly,” the occultist said. “It sits at the outskirts within the wood. Twenty nuns live there now.”

“Then that is where we are going,” Charly said. “I find the idea of frying nuns as offensive as you two.”

They reached the taxi rank and climbed inside the sleek, black vehicle.

“St Mary please,” Charly said.

The driver set his clock and headed towards the nunnery. Thankfully the traffic was light, and the vehicle reached the locked gates ten minutes later. After payment, the vehicle set off, leaving them staring at the new problem.

“I don’t fancy climbing the ten foot wall,” Grant said. “Can’t you just waive a wand and create an entrance?”

The occultist grinned and checked the locked gate. It was secured by a new padlock and he shook it roughly. After a moment he reached toward the top and hauled himself up. They watched as he landed safely upon the open lawn.

“Time to join him I suppose,” Charly said.

As he landed inside the perimeter, Grant had reached the top of the gate. He carefully dodged the spikes before jumping down.

“The main entrance is that way,” the occultist pointed out. “The washing block should be to the rear then.”

“The water closet is outside?” Grant asked.

“It’s part of their suffrage. At least it makes our task a bit easier.”

They dashed toward the imposing Tudor building and gasped as they reached the left hand corner. The occultist glanced at the rear, just as a young nun stepped inside the washroom.

“Damn. One of the sisters is about to use it.”

Charly dashed toward the door and tried to open it. When it refused, he thumped the door with his fist.

“Get out of there now!”

The startled nun was genuinely terrified. Only six months in service, this was the last thing that she had expected.

“Come on man!” Charly shouted. “Your very soul is in imminent peril.”

Within the cold room, the good lady hesitated. As she did so, the tub gave off a loud howl.

“What in His name was that?” she asked swinging round.

Outside, the occultist became highly alarmed.

“If it escapes again, we are done for!”

He kicked at the door thrice, smashing the lock at the third attempt. As it burst open, a soul wrenching scream met their ears.

The nun was standing near the ceramic tub, engulfed in a firestorm sent from the pit of hell.

“We are too late!” Grant screamed.

“Over my dead body,” Charly shouted.

Ignoring the terrible flames, he grabbed the burning woman and hurled her outside. Dashing out, he rolled her violently until the flames were extinguished. He stared at the charred body and shouted back.

“She’s dead.”

Within the water closet, the occultist and Grant stared at the innocent looking killer.

“At least it’s still here,” Grant commented.

“It won’t stay for long,” the occultist whispered. “I can feel that.”

Charly ran inside and pointed at it.

“Now finish it.”

The occultist stared at him.

“A suggestion would be nice.”

Charly’s agile mind had worked out a rather drastic solution. Without warning, he grabbed the occultist by the shoulders and shoved him headlong into the bathtub. Grabbing Grant, he hauled him outside.

“Hit the deck!”

As they crashed down, the wc detonated. Bricks and stone scattered across the lawn as a fireball rolled towards the blue sky.
When the din had subsided, the two men rose slowly.

“How did you know?” Grant asked.

Charly looked at him.

“After the nun’s death, I suddenly realised that the occultist was immersed in evil. By shoving him into the tub, I created a short circuit. Hence the blast.”

From the monastery, women came running, and the two men dashed for the locked gate. After scrambling over, they dashed down the road until a taxi was successfully flagged down.

“I’m glad that is sorted out,” Grant said. “Hope the cops don’t find out.”

“I doubt that,” Charly replied. “The nuns don’t really know what happened.”

They parted outside the flat and Charly made his way upstairs slowly. As he opened the door, his loving cat padded toward him.
Charly knelt and stroked his pet, before wandering back to the peace of the lounge. As the cat joined him, he stared at the blank tv screen.

“I wonder what’s on.”

He switched it on and noted the film.

“I’ve seen this before,” he muttered. “Oh well. Have to watch it again I suppose.”

Charly settled back as the film played through. His loving pet curled up upon his lap and fell fast asleep.