How many stages do friendship have? Most of the profile says 'lets be friends, then we could move to next stage.' As far as with me it had only one stage. It is always friendship. And i think its the best way it have to be.

My friendships evolve from acquaintances, to regular friends, to those who I say are in my inter-sanctum which means they are like family.

In reference to that being said in a profile, they're talking about it turning into more than a friendship.

On a dating site I normally assume that people will start as friends, but unless we are same gender friends - it could become something more - doesn't mean it will - but it could if the pieces all "fit"

that's my approach to the whole "friends" thing on here

My guy friends are just friends. My boyfriends usually come from friends but are generally not a friend friend but somebody my friends know. I mean some of my friends and I have a line in the sand that says "Never cross into romance".

My guy friends are just friends. My boyfriends usually come from friends but are generally not a friend friend but somebody my friends know. I mean some of my friends and I have a line in the sand that says "Never cross into romance".


I could've sworn i seen the word 'Friend' in there, somewhere.

That is cool and one of the reasons I have been researching friendship. I have found that a relationship based on friendship nips a lot of problems in the bud to start with. It can allow one to come clean so to speak. I have found that relationships based on sex can temporary fix some sex problems like doing without, loneliness problems and maybe some compatibility issues but not get at some root problems. Some of the root problems that I have noticed in myself are things like honesty, rationalizing, justifying, sophistry, humility, ego, and the list just keeps going on.

acquaintance - someone circumstances forces you to associate with on a regular or nearly regular basis who you might also choose to hang out with occasionally

friend - someone you CHOOSE to associate with on a regular basis and hang out with/communicate with often

good/best friend - someone you CHOOSE to associate with on a regular basis and hang out with/communicate with often and with whom there is mutual reliablity and honesty,,,

Never having any friends to begin with and then getting a relationship with someone I have found without the friendship basis can be scary I have found. It can really screw up the give and take. One can feel either like they are giving too much or the other extreme taking too much. I think it has to be balanced.

Taking the time to get to know someone before launching into an affair seems to me the only prudent way to go. Besides, being friends helps the communication a lot when you hit some rough patches.

friendship is like syphilis which is kinda like owning a minivan. everyone wants a ride because they acoustics are great but you have to decide who gets to ride shotgun. everyone else kinda doesn't matter. best to be friendly because they are more like syphilis than they person who rides up front nearest you.

so, my question is:

what does this have to do with finding love?

when someone steers you in the direction of friendship, friendship first, leads you on, it's only because you obviously don't have what it takes to impress upon them that your sperm will insure their prosperity and happiness.

sadly, we spend much time compiling a list of things that make us happy and it has nothing to do with love, or our idea of what that is.

in short, be your own best friend.

friends don't let friends play on the internet.

It is the rare person I would call a friend; endorse, help when it isn't convienent, go the estra mile for. So people who put in their profile that they want to start as friends always kind of make me back up.

I figure they are looking for someplace to hang out, be over familiar, ask for privileges they have not earned , and if and only if you bend over backwards for them MAYBE they will consider you for a real relationship. Too often the friends first is really just friends with benifits naloney where one side uses the other until what they really want comes along.

I want to start out as polite acquaintences. They don't owe me anything and vice versa. I don't want to know their family secrets, see their latest tax refund, or know what their favoirite sex position is. It would be nice to know if they have similiar interests an past-times and maybe a few basics like if they are polar opposites in lifestyle because it is not likely that I am going to want to become a whole new me for anyone or even belive on my best day that what I bring to the table is going to justify that for someone else but for grimeny sakes it is intternet chat and maybe a couple hours socializeing over a meal or some kind of public event not a screening to donate a kidney. Dateing is suppose to be fun. A little step beyound your existing circle of friends and family hopefully towards and association with someone.

Do I sometimes befriend the people I date? Sure. My time & money is limited so I don't go out with people I have little in common with. I generally like most people on some level I don't even mind helping most people at some point. Been told often I am generous to a fault that way but those who take advantage yill wear out their grace quickly enough and that is on them.

A social person and good listener I have often introduced people that I have dated and didn't match to to their future mates. A particularly good bargain for me since both usually remain friends.

But I don't buy the whole notion that all but a small percentage of people you date will become your personal friend and lover. Since most people resent the second class position of only friends if they are looking for more it is really better to make a polite severance and just move on not play on the guise of friendship for whatever it might be worth at the moment until what is wanted comes along. It only makes some one feel used or the person doing it even worse as the user.