this isnt towards all men, but some just can't show theyre feelings. Why is that? Is it because they are scared on how they feel? Or they just dont feel the same and dont want to hurt you? I just dont get it. Everytime I start to like a guy, he can't really show me how he feels or tell me..I think he wants to, but is scared..I dont know. I just thought i'd ask.
reason i asked is i met this wonderful guy on here back in Jan and we started dating, slowly but surely. To be honest, i didnt think i liked him at first, but then he grew on me. Just an all around sweet, sexy, understanding person and since jan, we had our ups & downs due to issues that i dont care to say, but still got along great, i could talk to him for hours and hours and he felt the same for me..but, then the last couple of weeks things started to kinda of fall apart and then last week, he broke up with me saying he thought he was ready for a relationship but he's not and needs to work on himself and i respect that and i will give him his space. But, i email him and he doesnt seem to respond. why isnt he? doesnt feel the same? or what? I know i shouldnt worry bout it, but i really care for this man alot!!!! thanks..

just take your time my friend and it will work out for the best , some men have a hard time expressing their feelings hun but look at you who wouldnt want a nice person like you

By emailing him do you think he may feel you are not giving him his space?

i am not trying to be mean so bear with me
1. he wanted to break up
2. he said he wasnt ready for a relationship.
seems to me he is showing his feeling and trying not to hurt anyone in the process

allsmiles, no..he wants to be friends..its not like im emailin him constantly

Sweet, all I can share is my opinion from the counseling I have been thru & the things I learned of me.

We men from somewhere in the 40 & up age group, have a great delima to get past. The way we were TAUGHT things should be, has greatly changed. We were raised on Father knows best, Leave It to Beaver, John Wayne, etc. The MAN was god, his word LAW, final say, wife was to love & SERVE him. This is a lot to change & we have deep issues on doing it. It takes re-education of our minds & we have to first admit that things have changed. Try crawling in our heads & looking thru our eyes. Took me a lot of heart break & realizing that if I didn't learn/change/re-educate me, I would lose the best thing that ever happened to me. She helped with gentle guidance/proding/examples. I firmly believe behind every great man is an equal or better woman. Read "Men are from MARS & Women from VENUS". Learn of our caves, our moods, our hearts.
That was the last books she bought me. She died before I got it read, I buy it for gifts at engagement parties & kids tell me they learned from it. I buy the tapes so they can listen together while driving. Might help him & you.

and nu2..i understand..thanks

ty sage..that was great and i understand, totally..its just hard, is all...but ty

sometimes sweet us men dont realize what we have till its gone too.

true hawk..maybe one day he'll come back, but im not going to push it..i have to take care of myself in the process and let him do the same..ty,darlin

cheers.!! xo

I know how you feel. Not long ago I had a relationship with a man that ended with just being friends. I am still in his email list but don't ever get a personal response to any emails I send him. It hurts but one needs to decide what hurts more... no contact or one sided contact.

sage i disagree with you. im 53 i would have to have lived in a cave not to see the changes in society the last 30 yrs. by no means am i a perfect examaple of the modern man but i due try. but by seeing the changes i have been able to change with the times and i am a better man for it

so true allsmiles

you are very welcome sweet

heheheh
in general men are conditioned by family and society that this is not "manly"
some of us grow and overcome it, some dont

Sweet...I wouldn't contact him at all...Let him contact you when or if he is ready...Let him work through the things he needs to work through first...Obviously he isn't ready for all that a relationship entails and I don't think it has to do with you....BUT more to do with the place he is at with himself at the moment!!!!!!!!

Nu2, good for you, you learned on your own.
I have simply seen to many that didn't.
Groups are full of them.

native, yeh i thought bout that..i think i will..its gonna kill me inside not too, but you are right..and its not me..i just feel like an idiot..i shouldnt of gotten involved in the first place..oh well..it is what it is..im powerless..

SweetK, if I have ever heard that line or used any like it, it was because I didn't feel that she and I would work and I didn't want to hurt her because the love for her was in me but,,,SOMETHING, just wasn't workable or able to CHANGE,
something that I COULDN'T change or think that she could either?? Im not saying that this is HIS REASONING, just that it might be.

And some dudes like some women, have a VERY hard time expressing their TRUE thoughts at them moments when asked, BUT,,if YOU were in the relationship even a month, YOU should KNOW how he was with his abilities to open up and talk about
issues past and present,so IF he was an open and talkitive person that showed or expressed his thoughts well, then MY example would more fit his truth. SORRY, but I do think he had your feelings in his thoughts, and GOD only knows why the LOVE one feels that the other doesn't feel the same,


But it is SO MUCH better to find this out from him NOW,,than to waste another year or two and THEN have him tell you THAT!!