You gave me more happiness in our years than I've ever felt. I never appreciated that until it was gone. For your patience and un-self-conscious love, thank you. For all of the nightmares you talked me down from... Words will never fully express how thankful I am to have had and held you in those dark times. Our love was real and for a time, the only thing that mattered in my world. I never meant to lose sight of that. Admitting that it was gone from me is truly the ****ing hardest thing I have ever had to do. I would have given anything just to be able to feel that warmth again. Nothing feels right now. Nothing moves me, not music or laughter, not .. Anything. Without you I am just marking time until I grow old. I ****ing loved you, with every fiber of my being.. I still love you. It kills me not to say it to your face. But I also love you enough to know I didn't deserve you. If I try to keep you, you'll be denied the life you really and truly should be living. You are my only true friend in the world, and now I set you free. For every one of the 800 paper cranes in a box in my closet.. For every minute you spent making them for a selfish and undeserving man, thank you. You are more beautiful than anything in this selfish, ****ed up world and I only regret that I never told you.