I think its important to work as a 'unit'

the more 'individuality' becomes the predominant lifestyle, the further apart people grow


it happened to me too, though not married nearly as long

* me peeks in sees the discussion* And with my divorces, quietly turns and eases out of the room. Otherwise I will be accused of man bashing.

I know many couples who have been married a long time. Next year is my parents' 40th anniversary.

I do have to wonder about those who have been married and divorced several times, though. Sometimes people say they are wary about those who are single and have never been married. I worry more about getting involved with someone who has been married and divorced several times...

If your only hating on your exes Trouble it shouldn't be a problem.

Also thats awesome Singme. My parents celebrated their fortieth this past year too.

Because, unlike decades past women enjoy a lot more freedom, no longer do they have to stick it out in a marriage because heaven forbid they go to church a divorced woman...And because people are starting to realize just how useless the whole charade is in the first place.

UMm singme sweet. FOR the record. I'm going through my third divorce. YET I did not cause any of them. Well the first at 18 I didn;t like being abused, So that one I left.
But some men just cannot stay in a committed relationship. My other two I was cheated on , and not for lack of attention. One just couldn;t grow up. And the latest. After his parents died a few years ago, he reverted back to being an immmature self serving individual. I did whatever I could, was the devoted wife, Supportign emotional, physically and financially when able.
Sometimes. ITs just what happens, So please try not to judge those who have gone through a few bad marriages. I've have two that were both long relationships. (8 years & 11 years) I was not the reson they fell apart, in fact I probably stayed longer trying to get them to work right.
Some people just can't seem to find someone as committed to a relationship as they are.
OR is that I should be committed..... literally for repeatedly trying?

I know everyone is different. It was more of a comment based on what others have said in the past about those who have never been married, as I said in my last post.

Ok, I just didn't want you to miss out on any chances.There are some wonderful men(and women) that have been married and divorced due to circumstances beyond their control.

Just wanted to help you to understand mayeb a little better in place of wondering.

Hello, this young woman has a head on her shoulders and knows how to use it! We are a media shake and bake society of quick fixes. "lets just do it and we'll figure it out later". The chances of this working in our current world is next to none.

RUN, SAVE YOURSELF! GODZILLA IS COMING!

Wouldn't that be more like Bridezilla? Or perhaps Groomzilla is coming for a showdown?

I come from a very big clan wherein separation (no divorce here in my country) is a no no for married individuals no matter what the family situation is. In my research, I am the only one who had the guts to break the norm in at least 3 of our generations. Having said this, it is not an easy thing for my family to accept. But then, my younger relatives who are brave enough to comment say that I am very much different from them, anyway. For me, today's woman/man is much capable of making decisions based on how she/he perceives her/his rights and individuality. Today's man/woman no longer has the need to adhere to a certain standard brought about by the society, so much unlike our parents' generation.

If Dad hadn't passed away, my parents would be celebrating their 40th next week

Dad became discontent, depressed, drug addicted, and dramatic once he was too sick to work and it was very hard for mom to live with. She was considering divorce before he passed away so maybe not, but there were several times mom left and then they always worked it out!

I divorced because our lives took different paths. He was not the man I thought I had married. You can know someone a long time before they show who they really are!

In your country, there are many men who abuse the traditions. From talking to a few women from your country, it seems the past two generations are just beginning to stand up to their men. Cheating and abuse is become less tolerated.

However, it also depends upon which region of the country one is from. Some areas are more traditional than others. Some hardly follow the traditions, but those tend to be urban centers.

Am I correct? Just trying to make sure I understand based on conversations I've had.

it's true. fewer people have the patience to work things out and therefore just give up when things get difficult. i admit that in some instances i'm the same way. i have no tolerance for certain types of b.s. and will definitely walk away. i would like to have a woman in my life, i don't need one in my life.



. . .

In the "old" days, divorce was expensive (it still can be), long, difficult, and had a social stigma attached.

Nowadays there is social acceptance of divorce so if the parties want to split, they do. There are more divorces and fewer long term incompatible unhappy marriages.

It is noticeable how an increase in number of separation here shows in statistics, yes.

I can't say it depends on the region but in my opinion, education and economic status of the married individuals has something to do with it. The more financially secure the couple or any one of them, the more guts to go thru all the aftermath of the separation. The more educated the individuals involved, the more lack of fear to go against the usual norm here (Filipino families tend to stick together despite everything). I don't know, but this is from what I observed... not sure about the others, really.