Topic: food for thought | |
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For everyone on here of all ages who keep asking does long distance
work? Can you really meet someone on a dating site? Can you really fall inl ove without meeting the person? Let me remind all of us here that it wasnt too long ago, that marriages were ALWAYS arranged for the children by their parents / gaurdians (and for a lady who's parents died, it was her brothers responsibility to find her a god husband). This happened at the time of birth as well as when the young person in question came of age. And neither person had a sya in the matter. They were marched inot church one dy and presented witht heir spouse to be, a lot of times having never even met the person prior to this, and they were expected to get along well and to begin building a family immediately. The majority of these marriages worked out quite well, not because the matchmakers knew what they were doing, but because the two people in question had one choice: Get along and be happy with each other, or live a miserable life with each other. That being said which would you choose if in their shoes? I know I would choose happiness, straight up. Now, this is not in practice so much as it used to be, and not legal in the united states (although some religions / cults do still do it). We all have the choice of whom we will be with and when. But hte same question applies. Should we work to make the relationship a good one? Or should we just turn our heads and say this wont work and find soemone else? Our foreparents could not turn their heads. Just because we CAN do so, does that mean we should automatically do so at the first mole-hill? Let me know what you all think as this is something that does get on my nerves occasionally watching people not even try andmake things work out. |
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lmao, 28 people have looked at this thread, yet no one cared to post. I
wonder if thismeans they are ones who just turn away after an honest misunderstanding, or if they thinkI am suggesting we go back to arranged marriages (I hope htis is not the case lol, cause I do NOT want that!!! lmao) |
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daniel...
I'll give you my 2 cents worth. To me a relaionship takes work, hard work. I find that divorce is rampant and MOST prople are not willing to make the relationship work for them. I'm not saying that I agree with arranged marriages, I don't think it should come to that. What I am saying is that a marriage should be a commitment that is not taken lightly, that when the rough spots happen....it should be worked at, and not taken for granted and give up so quickly to a divorce. It has been my experience that...a marriage doesn't work when you ONLY have one person trying to keep their head above water, it takes TWO to make it work. |
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Personally I think anything can work if both people want it bad
enough..It doesn't matter how or where you meet!!!!!!!! |
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you are both absolutely correct and puffins I agree with you that I do
not agree with arranged marriages. I do however believe people have come to accept a marriage as a glorified dating scene, where when you get tired of it you just move on to someone else. |
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This was actually really interesting to read. They way I look at this is
most people are not actually looking for what they say they are. We tend to fall in this pattern of what we would like but not what will make us happy. We end up putting Expectations on ourseleves of what were looking for because the way we are brought up in socity in todays world. Now if most of us look back and I mean really look into our lives and relationships,there had to be at least one person in our lives that was right for us but because of our own selfishness of what we wanted we let it go. Today for me I can actually say what I'm looking for and I have found it and that is because I look at the women for who she is on the inside and how she looks at life and can appreciate the small things it has to offer. The part about this topic that Danie said. For everyone on here of all ages who keep asking does long distancework? Can you really meet someone on a dating site? Can you really fall inlove without meeting the person? The first two I can actually say yes if your honest with yourself of what you really wont and looking for it will happen. It took me a long time to realize to stop looking for what I can get out of things and to learn how to give and that it's self is what changed things for me. |
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My reply to this is ....
How deep our your desires to make a family unit .... now days there are children as well.... If I should find someone on here that wants the same... as I do (ever lasting Love) I will do whatever it takes to keep it strong and alive....Yes,I do know that you can fall in love with someone without seeing them Someone has my Heart and every Thought..... |
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long distance is very challenging because of time available to get to
know someone not saying it cannot be done, but i think it takes 2 dedicated people who are really in love |
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exactly joyce. And to paraphrase that, both people ned to want it and
be willing to make it work no matter what. |
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i would be honest and say i am not sure i could do it
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at least you would be honost about it though. Thank you for being so.
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yes ...this is correct...it is hard but it can be done
both have to trust,respect, and want to build the relationship everyday......re: it does not matter the time of day....just stop everything and let the other know you are still there. they are with you in everything you do.. This gentleman Im speaking I have not yet met...However,in August I will....Im sure everything will be great...my heart skips a beat everytime the phone rings and it is him....He makes me feel alive, young,and I can not stop SMILING after we have talked |
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i think on how far that long distance is...... 3000 miles about
impossible for each to get to know each other... now 300 miles a different story....could be weekend things if ya only gotta drive 5 hours.... but i still consider 300 miles long distance lol but not impossible... |
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i agree buttons....2 hours away is diffent then another state
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nurjoyce I met someone that lives 12 hours from me and if I were to pass
this up because a little distance Id be a fool. I stop looking at what I want the feeling of I need them here. The I want I want the me me me which most of us do and that is why we have the problems we do. Knowing she lives so far away as most of us put it, it's not like it's going to be that way for ever and if we work together like we are we will be going back and forth as far as travaling. I guss it's finding someone that is not afraid to make a change in there life as far as moving. I my self have no problem moving for anyone as long as I feel this is real and what they really want as I do. Hmm think about this people,I know someof us have met someone that we would like to begin somthing with them but because we were not willing to take a chance that you let it go and now where are you? |
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Texas
I understand what you are saying Shadow I would have to find someone I know is capable of doing the same I am a giver by nature and seem to find guys that take it just does not work in those conditions |
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plus i have kids to think about
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Yeah I know what you mean. I guess this is why it took me a long time to
meet this one that I did. I can say this though when it happens you will know |
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i agree- it takes 2 people in love and very dedicated
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congrats to ya shadow
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