"well i cheated because my ex was bad in bed and i didnt want to leave him but i needed some really good sex. i didnt cum for 3 years with him so . . . ."

Yes, this is the sort of self-absorbed, childishly selfish "reasoning" that most cheaters seem to use. They wanted something, they didn't have it, so they cheated to get it, and thought they deserved to.
The same people usually complain bitterly if someone treats them the same way in return. Thoughtless and immature.

There are pathological cheaters as well, of course. Some of them are so hooked on the thrill of the cheat, the only reason they DO bother to establish a relationship at all, is so that they can have someone to cheat ON.
But the selfish, thoughtless ones are the most common.

I think you have your wants and needs backwards. You see, you NEEDED to leave him if you WANTED some really good sex from someone else. Wrong is wrong and selfish is selfish.

All the excuses I heard included but were not limited to:

"I did not sew my wild oats before you so...... sorry"
"Things are not going well between us"

But most of the time it was deny deny deny til death.

Well I would have handled it differently.........Y not just talk about the problem & try & solve it TOGETHER there is many ways this problem can be solved! Oral or toys there is always a solution if you just communicate!

hmmmmm