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| Topic: is it the men | |
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A list?  I hope you are kiddint!  
I have preferences for sure but regardless of those preferences - when I meet the right guy - it all goes out the window! 
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Edited by
willy_cents
on
Sat 06/12/10 12:58 PM
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Picky in what way?? Everyone has their personal preferences. I understand what you are saying. I think there is a subtle difference though. Selective vs. commitment-phobe. Let’s face it, when the chemistry is right the “list” is null and void. If a person is stuck on the minutia of a few characteristics then one of two things are the problem: 1. The chemistry is missing; it’s all good on paper but you feel nothing in person. 2. The person is afraid of commitment and is looking for excuses not to compromise the little things. you hit the nail right on the head. |
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Picky in what way?? Everyone has their personal preferences. I understand what you are saying. I think there is a subtle difference though. Selective vs. commitment-phobe. Let’s face it, when the chemistry is right the “list” is null and void. If a person is stuck on the minutia of a few characteristics then one of two things are the problem: 1. The chemistry is missing; it’s all good on paper but you feel nothing in person. 2. The person is afraid of commitment and is looking for excuses not to compromise the little things. you hit the nail right on the head. heheheheheheheh! You said, "head"! 
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[ heheheheheheheh! You said, "head"!
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I live in the internet. Dude, almost 240000 posts, u must be living in it and breathing it. Amateur. 
Newbie
You cheated the internets, evil...just plain evil.
Rules are for the exceptions 
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I wouldn't call it picky...I would call it difference in opinion and tastes 
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women are picky because they can be.
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women are picky because they can be. 
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women are picky because they can be. Exactly!
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Don't look at it as women being picky. Look at it as some azzhole in her past made her very awareof what she DOESN'T want so now she knows better. I totally agree...first there has to be physical attraction and then they have to have a decent conversation some don't even open their mouths (usa). Oh well we drew with you on the football only because we let you lol...so now we are evens lol. |
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Why must women be so picky when we are all here to gain.They are all not prize winners either but they think they are.WHATS UP WITH THAT. The same reason why we are so picky although we are here to gain.. We are not prize winners but we think we are.. That's what's up!! 
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Edited by
singmesweet
on
Mon 06/14/10 05:33 AM
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Why must women be so picky when we are all here to gain.They are all not prize winners either but they think they are.WHATS UP WITH THAT. I don't see why they shouldn't be picky. If you do not fit into someone's preferences, move on. There are many, many, many single women out there. |
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Why must women be so picky when we are all here to gain.They are all not prize winners either but they think they are.WHATS UP WITH THAT. Wats up?? didnt she like your quirks? and u complain about that? WHATS UP WITH THAT?! |
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Everyone deserves what they want in life. Discriminating or not – it’s their life to live. Settling is poisonous. Why be miserable with someone you are not completely happy with for the rest of your life. That’s just silly. It wastes the time of both people and heartbreak is sure to happen. Settling also creates baggage and a trail of dysfunction. I’d rather be single and selective than in a relationship because I took just any ‘ol guy. i agree, but i think a lot of people have their sights set on some fairy tale person and therefore overlook all of us regular yet perfectly adequate people. . . . Even if they do, it's their right to wait for it. Just because a woman waits for "her knight in shining armor" doesn't mean that guy won't be a 'regular' person .. he's a KNIGHT to HER. Not the whole world. 
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Edited by
74Drew
on
Mon 06/14/10 08:02 AM
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Everyone deserves what they want in life. Discriminating or not – it’s their life to live. Settling is poisonous. Why be miserable with someone you are not completely happy with for the rest of your life. That’s just silly. It wastes the time of both people and heartbreak is sure to happen. Settling also creates baggage and a trail of dysfunction. I’d rather be single and selective than in a relationship because I took just any ‘ol guy. i agree, but i think a lot of people have their sights set on some fairy tale person and therefore overlook all of us regular yet perfectly adequate people. . . . Even if they do, it's their right to wait for it. Just because a woman waits for "her knight in shining armor" doesn't mean that guy won't be a 'regular' person .. he's a KNIGHT to HER. Not the whole world.
it's like in the movie practical magic with sandra bullock and nicole kidman, as a child sandra bullocks character wishes for a guy with all of the certain characteristics that would pretty much make for an impossible person. of course through the magic of hollywood he was possible, but that's not the point. it's okay to have standards, it's something else to knit pick. i've seen sites where you could filter the potential matches based on eye color, or hair color. are we really that picky that we disqualify people based on the color of their eyes? in some instances, yes some people are that picky. i think those people need to wake up. what happens when a person comes along that has all of the right qualities except, oops they have brown eyes and i wanted someone with blue eyes? guess i'll just have to wait for the next one to come along. nobody is perfect like the prince charmings in fairy tales. people need to have realistic standards. and they need to focus on attributes that are truly important. of course another problem could be the perceived requirements. i think that sometimes ( i know i do this ) we as people think that the opposite sex is looking for a certain thing ( which they may or may not be ) and therefore we prematurely disqualify ourselves because of what we "think" the other wants. we get to thinking "oh, she's just so perfect. she wouldn't be interested in someone like me" when there is a possibility that we could be exactly what they're looking for. the plain and simple truth is that nobody knows what the someone else is looking for unless they find out from that person directly. so, standards are important, but they should be realistic. and just because i don't think that i'm what she's looking for, it doesn't necessarily mean that i'm not exactly what she's looking for. . . . |
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Everyone deserves what they want in life. Discriminating or not – it’s their life to live. Settling is poisonous. Why be miserable with someone you are not completely happy with for the rest of your life. That’s just silly. It wastes the time of both people and heartbreak is sure to happen. Settling also creates baggage and a trail of dysfunction. I’d rather be single and selective than in a relationship because I took just any ‘ol guy. i agree, but i think a lot of people have their sights set on some fairy tale person and therefore overlook all of us regular yet perfectly adequate people. . . . Even if they do, it's their right to wait for it. Just because a woman waits for "her knight in shining armor" doesn't mean that guy won't be a 'regular' person .. he's a KNIGHT to HER. Not the whole world.
it's like in the movie practical magic with sandra bullock and nicole kidman, as a child sandra bullocks character wishes for a guy with all of the certain characteristics that would pretty much make for an impossible person. of course through the magic of hollywood he was possible, but that's not the point. it's okay to have standards, it's something else to knit pick. i've seen sites where you could filter the potential matches based on eye color, or hair color. are we really that picky that we disqualify people based on the color of their eyes? in some instances, yes some people are that picky. i think those people need to wake up. what happens when a person comes along that has all of the right qualities except, oops they have brown eyes and i wanted someone with blue eyes? guess i'll just have to wait for the next one to come along. nobody is perfect like the prince charmings in fairy tales. people need to have realistic standards. and they need to focus on attributes that are truly important. of course another problem could be the perceived requirements. i think that sometimes ( i know i do this ) we as people think that the opposite sex is looking for a certain thing ( which they may or may not be ) and therefore we prematurely disqualify ourselves because of what we "think" the other wants. we get to thinking "oh, she's just so perfect. she wouldn't be interested in someone like me" when there is a possibility that we could be exactly what they're looking for. the plain and simple truth is that nobody knows what the someone else is looking for unless they find out from that person directly. so, standards are important, but they should be realistic. and just because i don't think that i'm what she's looking for, it doesn't necessarily mean that i'm not exactly what she's looking for. . . . Well call me the exception, but I never think I might not be what someone is looking for. I guess I just always see the glass 1/2 full not 1/2 empty, so I never take the initiative to disqualify myself 
Life has enough drama .. I try not to add to it.
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Let's face it....everyone has expectations. It's a fact of life. As little girls we grow up dreaming of Prince Charming and the fairy tale life. In my opinion, most men grow up dreaming of a woman that's a mixture of mom and a Playboy centerfold! The reality is, we have to grow up at some point and change our expectations to match real world experiences. Unfortunately, some never do and are destined to be disappointed time after time. I'm in no way saying that anyone should "settle" however if they would adjust expectations to be more realistic, they may realize that what they thought they would have to "settle" for is maybe exactly what they need and want?
BTW - I do the same thing too Drew....I automatically assume when viewing profiles and pics that I am not what they are looking for and they wouldn't be interested in me, so I don't send them an e-mail. Very self-defeating but good to know I'm not the only one...lol. 
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Let's face it....everyone has expectations. It's a fact of life. As little girls we grow up dreaming of Prince Charming and the fairy tale life. In my opinion, most men grow up dreaming of a woman that's a mixture of mom and a Playboy centerfold! The reality is, we have to grow up at some point and change our expectations to match real world experiences. Unfortunately, some never do and are destined to be disappointed time after time. I'm in no way saying that anyone should "settle" however if they would adjust expectations to be more realistic, they may realize that what they thought they would have to "settle" for is maybe exactly what they need and want? BTW - I do the same thing too Drew....I automatically assume when viewing profiles and pics that I am not what they are looking for and they wouldn't be interested in me, so I don't send them an e-mail. Very self-defeating but good to know I'm not the only one...lol.
Yanno, too much reality is bad for the soul. Next you're gonna be tellin me there is no Santa Claus .. To which I will promptly respond with "NOT listening .. LA LA LA LA LA* with hands over ears
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Let's face it....everyone has expectations. It's a fact of life. As little girls we grow up dreaming of Prince Charming and the fairy tale life. In my opinion, most men grow up dreaming of a woman that's a mixture of mom and a Playboy centerfold! The reality is, we have to grow up at some point and change our expectations to match real world experiences. Unfortunately, some never do and are destined to be disappointed time after time. I'm in no way saying that anyone should "settle" however if they would adjust expectations to be more realistic, they may realize that what they thought they would have to "settle" for is maybe exactly what they need and want? BTW - I do the same thing too Drew....I automatically assume when viewing profiles and pics that I am not what they are looking for and they wouldn't be interested in me, so I don't send them an e-mail. Very self-defeating but good to know I'm not the only one...lol.
Yanno, too much reality is bad for the soul. Next you're gonna be tellin me there is no Santa Claus .. To which I will promptly respond with "NOT listening .. LA LA LA LA LA* with hands over ears
Oh I would NEVER do that! I may not believe in "Mr. Perfect" but I do still believe in Santa Claus!
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Edited by
VacantDreamer
on
Mon 06/14/10 11:38 AM
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it's like in the movie practical magic with sandra bullock and nicole kidman, as a child sandra bullocks character wishes for a guy with all of the certain characteristics that would pretty much make for an impossible person. of course through the magic of hollywood he was possible, but that's not the point. it's okay to have standards, it's something else to knit pick. i've seen sites where you could filter the potential matches based on eye color, or hair color. are we really that picky that we disqualify people based on the color of their eyes? in some instances, yes some people are that picky. i think those people need to wake up. what happens when a person comes along that has all of the right qualities except, oops they have brown eyes and i wanted someone with blue eyes? guess i'll just have to wait for the next one to come along. nobody is perfect like the prince charmings in fairy tales. people need to have realistic standards. and they need to focus on attributes that are truly important. of course another problem could be the perceived requirements. i think that sometimes ( i know i do this ) we as people think that the opposite sex is looking for a certain thing ( which they may or may not be ) and therefore we prematurely disqualify ourselves because of what we "think" the other wants. we get to thinking "oh, she's just so perfect. she wouldn't be interested in someone like me" when there is a possibility that we could be exactly what they're looking for. the plain and simple truth is that nobody knows what the someone else is looking for unless they find out from that person directly. so, standards are important, but they should be realistic. and just because i don't think that i'm what she's looking for, it doesn't necessarily mean that i'm not exactly what she's looking for. . . . Ah but she was dreaming up an IMPOSSIBLE man so that she wouldn't ever fall in love. She didn't actually WANT all those things. She was protecting herself. Just wanted to point that out. |
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