So I'm getting a lot of e-mails from some site I never heard of (apparently, they're tangentially connected to some other side I'm on), telling me "These people want to meet you!"

And then they show me pictures of six girls, and they're all from France.

This puzzles me. I don't know anybody in France, I don't speak French (outside of being able to pronounce the names of most of the Montreal Canadiens), I've never been to France. Why would girls in France all of a sudden want to meet me?

I remember reading somewhere that Jerry Lewis is some sort of megastar in France. What does this mean? Well, I don't know much about Jerry Lewis except that he used to have his own comic book, and that his head looks bigger every year when I see him on that telethon. He's just about at the point where he could be his own cartoon mascot at Disney World.

What else do I know about France? Well, Groundskeeper Willie on the Simpsons referred to the French as "cheese-eating surrender monkeys," and, while I like monkeys as much as the next guy, I'm not a big fan of cheese.

At any rate, France is really too far away to be of any practical utility to me, viz a viz the whole dating scenario. And even if those French girls came over here, what would we talk about? French fries? "The French Connection"? Paris Hilton? I don't see it going anywhere.

Are you sure they're not from India and just saying they are French?

Are you sure they want to talk???

French girls are wild. I know I have been with a few in my time!

You don't need to say anything with what I am referring too.

They could be from Frunobulax 7 for all I know. That might actually be better....!!

Meh, I don't have anything that will stretch that far....

Here's another France trivia bit-Perrier is produced in Vergeze. Oh, and Napoleon was an azzhole.

Now that is perplexing and funny, Lex.....