All my friends are tired of hearing me complain so I'm just going to rant here. I'm tired of being the placeholder for other guys.

In my last 5 relationships (meaning I dated them for more than 3 months exclusively) I've been left and told this. "Your a great guy and I really like you but I'm sorry I'm "in love" with someone else."

I just don't get it, if I'm such a great guy how come they never "fall in love" with me? Why do I feel used like I was just someone to occupy their time while they waited for their "one true love" to come back?

Four of the five girls left me for an ex that came back into their lives. One dated me just to try and get to my best friend claiming to have loved him from afar for years.

What do you think? Am I just on a pity party and being emo about this? Or do I have a valid reason to feel used and unappreciated? I just hope the next girl to come into my life will date me because they actually want to be with me. Not because they are trying to get over someone else.

these are questions that only you can answer...sit back and think. for me i look at all the things that started us dating... you will eventually learn red flags... and hopefully improve from them.. maybe you are getting into relationships all too quick... good luck

Sorry, but you are being used and unappreciated. But not to fear, they will start loving you big time when you turn 25 years old......21 is just to young to be in love....

Easy does it my young friend, time is on your side...

Maybe you should talk to the people you date and find out if they are over their ex before you invest time in a relationship. If you know they recently broke it off or got dumped by someone maybe you should back off. It may save you from having these kinds of issues

I "courted" one girl for 3 months before I would agree to "date" her. She seemed really into me, wrote me poetry and got all starry eyed. Finally I trusted her enough to get into a full exclusive relationship and one year later she just ups and decides she doesn't want me and goes back to her ex.

...

I need to just start polygraphing potential girlfriends...

parting of dating is trusting someone and sometimes getting hurt. They probably never lied to you. Feeling change. Esp when your young- you dont even know who you are and what you want

Testify sister .......listen to her, she knows of what she speaks....

If you think about this, and all that has happened, aren't you glad that all of this has come out? I mean, so you courted a girl and then a year later she leaves. Life. Other chicks have been with you and they leave. Life. Yeah, it isn't "fair" but think about this. Had one of those chicks married you, more than likely it wasn't going to work out. You have basically been through these women and they obviously "thought" they loved you, but in the end, they made the mistake of leaving. Hey, there choice.

Also, that line they have given you as there excuse is a total cop out. Who cares how nice you are? It is just a way for them to feel ok about leaving you. For some reason, people think it is easier that way than just saying, "Listen. I don't love you, and I don't want to hurt you. But I cannot see me being with you anymore when I want this other person." That is the truth. You can't sugarcoat it. But that is what we like to do. Guess it is better than getting a breakup via text ya know.

Anyways, I could tell you to look at the women you have dated and ask yourself why you dated them? Or what was so great about each one? Or this or that. But the fact is, right now, the one thing you need to focus on is getting past what has happened before you move. I say this because the next girl you date, if you haven't gotten over your past you will project it onto her. Deep down you will fear she will do the same thing to you that these other chicks did. And that isn't fair to her or to you. You have to accept what happened, deal with it, and move forward. That really is the best thing for you.

If you trip the guy in front of you, you might have a chance.

There are to many people in this world to worry about 4 or 5 people not wanting to be with you!

I completly agree, but for whatever reason this isn't enough to please some people. So you have to resort to eyedrops in their water, or tripping them.

I'm just giving other options is all.

Or just buy that guy a hooker. I mean...why not be nice about it?

I am glad we arent playing for the same team.....LOL

Hookers are underated..........

this is my plan, if I can't find a woman who will take me seriously as I am now I will keep several GFs after I get rich!

Seriously, how many of you women think a rich guy is going to take a relationship with any ONE woman seriously any more??? Is it me or the money that suddenly makes me attractive? Hmmmmmmmmmmmm.

I will say this though, I love it when I meet a woman with a spine and a will to live her own life! I would say 85% of women look for security in a relationship FIRST with all of the BS aside! it doesn't matter if you are fat and ugly as long as you got money. There is always a fluffy Cottontail out there willing to be a slut for the money! then there are hookers but I can respect some of them. the drug addict crack whore ones no respect. The working girls making the dobbs to retire on? I respect them. At least thy are honest about what they do for the money. They don't live a lie.

Since people want to be unfair so shall I be as unfair. I want what I want. Period. If I am bringing home all the bacon and she wants to be 'kept' she can be one of three or four then. Eff the BS and hypocrisy!

Now remember, Softails (men who don't work for a living) also will marry messed up rich women and put up with them just because they have THEIR security as well. I cannot respect them at all. They make us real men look bad!

Since you brought up the word “emo” – I agree.

Nothing is more of a turn off than a whiney “nice guy” type.

Pull up your big boy pants and start dating girls with a little more integrity. When red flags are thrown up, don’t stay in the relationship.

You are allowing yourself to be second best. I think you need develop a little self esteem and stop blaming others. Take responsibility for the fact that you allow people to use you.

I don't like to be coddled and I don't coddle. I like my friends and romantic partners to be strong enough on their own. Sorry if I didn't give the fluffy advice as others members did - I just don't think a grown person should be treated like a little kid and patted on the head *there, there – It will be ok*

I wish you well.

Well if they left you for someone else, it just wasn't meant to be. Just be patient, and keep trying, eventually you'll find the right girl.