A young boy asks his father, "Dad, is it ok for us guys to notice all
the different kinds of boobs?" Surprised, the father answers, "Well,
sure son, we wouldn't be normal if we didn't... there are all kinds of
breasts... depending on a woman's age - in her twenties, a woman's
breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties,
they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are
like onions." "Onions, Dad?" "Yeah, you see them and they make you
cry...."

Not to be outdone, his sister asks her mother, "Mom, how many kinds of
penises are there?" The mother, delighted to have equal time, answers,
"Well, daughter, a man goes through three phases. In a man's twenties, a
man's penis is like an oak, mighty and hard. In his thirties and
forties, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties,
it is like a Christmas tree." "A Christmas tree?" "Yep, dried up and the
balls are only there for decoration..."