tell me what and what not to say in a message to get a respond

# 1 Don't ask to chat right off the bat!!
#2 Don't come on too strong telling them how sexy, etc they are...real turnoff just meeting someone.
#3 Be polite & show interest in them but don't overdo it.
#4 be careful of the cougars!!

Welcome!

When going fishing, never ask a fish for advice.

Online isn't much different from real life. Come up with something funny. Something that shows your unique personality. Don't worry if the woman you're talking to will get it or not. If she doesn't the two of you likely wouldn't get along anyway.

Try to send messages while the person you are mailing is online. You are MUCH more likely to get a reply from a woman who's online than from one that checks her mail once a month.

Be clever and creative. Have fun thinking of something to write and it will come across more playfully when it's read.

Do not tell her she's beautiful. That what every guy does. Instead, get to know her a little and find something about her you actually like.

Most importantly, be fun and take the lead. Don't demand, but don't beg either. You are the man and she wants a man she can respect, not a sissy.

Huh. I guess this means that the woman that I'll be going out with is going to dump me soon after because the first email I sent was a compliment about her eyes?

DAMMIT!!!

Hey, a guy emailed me today & told me my hair was pretty!! He got my # then!!! Not why he got my # tho!! We chatted on IM & I liked his personality!! Going out this weekend...if he doesn't change his mind!!!

I think the whole thing is, no matter what you say to her, be sincere about it.

If you are sincere, she'll be able to tell.

You had a guy tell you that your hair was pretty...I told someone that she had beautiful eyes.

In both cases, the woman decided to respond and things went from there.

Not every woman is going to respond to a compliment. Especially if she isn't really attracted to you in the first place.

But, if she is attracted, then she'll rspond even if it IS something she has heard before.

I agree!! There was a certain likable quality about this person & I rarely ever give my # out or chat when I first have contact with a person.

I actually agree with him. I'd much rather the first email I get be about something they found in my profile that they thought was interesting, or something I said in the forums they liked. Or something that makes me laugh. A compliment is nice, but it will mean more once you get to know her a bit.

Meh. To each their own.

I know at least two women who had a compliment, sincerely delivered, get their attention.

I'm not saying compliments are bad at all. Sometimes they are sincere right away. Other times, not so much. It's just going to depend on the situation, I guess. Still, for me, it's going to mean more coming from someone who has gotten to know me a bit.

I can understand that.
Like I said. It's a case of " to each their own ".

I emailed someone and said she had beautiful eyes. She appreciated that enough to check out my profile. She liked what she saw ( God only knows WHY...lol ) and decided to email back. She realized that, after talking to me a bit, I speak my mind and mean what I say. That gave a little more ' impact ' to the initial compliment.

Things went from there and all is well.

Something Random works for me.

"I noticed your noodles were looking especially nice today."

"Pardon me, Have you any pandas?"

...stuff like that.

But...that's me.

Sincerity. I agree...that's the key.

Worked for me.

Silly things like that are definitely a good way to start an email. If they make me laugh right away, that's a good thing.

mmhmm!

but basically just be who you are!~
If they don't respond, then it's not meant to be.

Ask her to turn on the web cam!!!!
Or ask if she has any 'intimate' photos she'd like to share.

oh yeah...that works.

Oh the OP will get a 'respond'.....now it may not be exactly what he was looking for.

Here's the thing about complimenting her looks, she didn't really do anything to get them. She hit the genetic jackpot. A compliment about her sense of style or her humor is IMHO a much better compliment to give her.

Unless she's worked very hard to lose weight and firm up her body in which case tell her she looks good.