You sit there and wait, and wait and wait..
Like a junkie needing a fix..
When finally they come they insert the needle,
and that is when it begains...
It is a slow drip in progress,you watch it disapear in your vains,
1, 2, 3, 4 drips and more..
If it goes any faster you feel sicker,so slower is better,
a great concept huh..hah..
Not for those experiencing this..
Your mind takes you to one-hundred diffrent places,
Taking you anywhere but where you are...
But it never fails somehow you always end up back there in that hospital room with the endless bag of self pity, self inflicted pain
one might say...
Watching the drip not able to tare your eyes away..
If they knew you at all they would see the questions, the forever questions that plauge your once simple care free mind..
Is this truely the way life must be lived...
Do any of these people really care,or is this just there job.
They are not here for your endless fears..
But you can not help but wonder to yourself what it has all-ready cost you,and what is to come...
It took your hair and it took your pride
It took something from your life, it is taken you..
Is there anyone left that cares about the battles you face..
Can they really understand...
Or did you manage to do what it is you do best and you
work so hard at doing and shut all doors...
Whoops... nope your still here..
But the questions you ask are hard to bare, there is doubt in your
every pore..
You can't even take that from your voice, what you can't say
my heart feels...
I know waiting is a hard, it is the hardest part of it all.
Waiting, waiting,waiting...
I wait everyday for something I don't have answeres to..
I go to bed never knowing if the poison they keep pouring
in my body is even enough to keep me waking up in the tomorrows...
You live day to day..Some people say they do,I would not place bets..
But you learn to..
Life is a ***** and and everyday becomes a challenge...
It becomes harder to swollow the tears that at time consumes
your ravaged body...
Why leave anything to chance, or fate, or hope..
Hell they can't even give you a guarantee..
But they can take your money and say "we will see"..
The machine at long last beeps...
and like a dream to a junkies ears you know it means you got the fix
you need, you are done..
You feel your lips spead from cheeck to cheek in the only smile you could muster, fake..
When they say brightly and to loudly, we will see you tomorrow..
And without your knowledge you are replying automatically,
See you than!!!
Leaving not knowing anymore today than you did yesterday, but if tomorrow comes the waiting will start all over again..
And you still wont have your answeres...
Damb cancer be damed


Sasha

The pains only withdraw for awhile, this living hell...so many to tell, so many I've known so well.
CANCER IS THE SPERM OF HELL.



I have lost many friends to this and many more yet to follow.

YOUR WRITE here is the sad tale of their truths,,and YOUR WORDS
are the ONLY ones they have now....


Thanks for sharing this with so many who IT has touched their lives...