What do ya mean "stage an accident"? I was just sitting there waiting for my bigger butt in a cup! HE plowed into ME. But now you got me wondering... ...maybe you men think alike! Perhaps my magnetic personality drove him to drive into me, just so we could meet.

I'll ask him tomorrow when I go pick up my $300 for the new bumper.

Costly cheeseburger if he doesn't score a date with me. I'm thinking that idea's about as bright as me setting myself aflame to try and meet a fireman or a doctor.

Unless of course his plan works and we're toasting with strawberry milkshakes in the future. In that case, the man's a genius! Wouldn't that just be the cat's arse? Here I am looking all these years (not really, but don't tell my mom!) and "THE ONE" literally crashes into me! That'd just be too ironic, even for me!

After the milkshake debacle, fate afflicted me with some kind of weird illness, so my presentation was delayed for the last two weeks while I developed a close personal relationship with the barf bucket. I finally returned to classes this week and had to present yesterday.

It's done and over with and I didn't throw up!

Actually, I took the good advice from here, practiced my arse off, and surprised myself. I think it went pretty well by the responses from my classmates. (We have to give a quick critique of each presentation so I ended up with thirty little "atta girl" notes.) One said that I either prepared really well or was a natural born public speaker. One said he could tell I've been doing this all my life! Speaking maybe, but not in public! I barely leave the cave. Won't know my grade 'til next week but I give myself an A for effort, because walking up in front of all those people took about every ounce of minimal strength I possess!

But at least it's over. And now I get to say I did it! I did it! Man-oh-man it sucked, but I friggen did it! Woo Hoo!

Public speaking really isn't much different from playing music on-stage. We always used a pretty simple rule: There are only two things the audience notices - whether everyone BEGINS at the same time and whether everyone ENDS at the same time. They never notice anything in-between.

Same with speaking - just have a cool opening and closing statement, thank them for listening, and exit, stage left.