The kingfisher, a large fish-eating bird, will only build its nest inside a microwave oven. This has caused some unfortunate calamities and several ruined meals.

The largest bat in the world is the Goliath Bat, found only in Turkmenistan and Uzbekistan. With a wingspan of up to 38 feet, the Goliath Bat has been seen carrying off camels and yaks.

With the extinction of Rousseau’s Gibbon, the closest living relative of the Siamang is the 1997 Ford Taurus.

“Marty,” a turtle at the Portland Oregon Zoo, is over 8000 years old.

Scientists in Greenland have discovered a termite that looks like Rush Limbaugh.

Amoebas can be taught to play very tiny accordions. Not well, though.

Is it possible to mate a porcupine and a whale? The Defense Department says yes.

Llamas are actually smarter than most people. And can write better dating site profiles.

Since Elephants are the only animals that can not jump our defense department have decided to fit them all with Pogo Sticks in order to make them not feel out of place......

did someone say Titmouse???

The Earth is being chased through space by a fantastically huge space dog. We are in for an Armageddon of dog drool when it catches us.

Dolphins are poets.

Rats are waging a never ending war on mice and their allies, the hamster for domination of the earth.

The cockroaches in Joe's Apartment are not the only ones who sing and dance.

Yaks take offense to humans using their name as a term of losing chow.

Bassett Hounds were brought to Earth by aliens. They use the dog's huge ears as listening devices.

There will soon be a hairless cat named after the actress Eartha Kitt. Anyone calling their cat Eartha Kitt Cat will be shot. Or sued.

Fleas will soon be getting agents for the circus acts they perform to amuse us.

Goldfish have better memories than we credit them with; we just don't keep them interested enough for them to show any progress.

Penguins are planning a class-action lawsuit againt all of the major tuxedo rental companies for infringement.

Miniature horses want us to know that they're not small... It's just that their larger cousins are huge.

They key to understanding cats is encased in every can of alphabet soup.

Polar bears wouldn't be so polar if they had lithium.

Ha, ha, ha! Good one!

I would think that would be easy to find...