Today's Economy

1. I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

2. I ordered a burger at McDonald's and the kid behind the
counter asked, "Can you afford fries with that?"

3. CEO's are now playing miniature golf.

4. If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient
Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

5. Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than
GM.

6. McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.

7. Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned
their children's names.

8. A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico

9. Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.

10. Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore.

11. The Mafia is laying off judges.

12. Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

13. Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff
scandal.
Oh, Great!! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being
investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!

And,finally...
14. I was so depressed last night thinking about the
economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Lifeline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a
truck.

funny! Good job.