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| Topic: New laws of the universe | |
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Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of any itch is inversely proportional to the reach. Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold. Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich of landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug. Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch. Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will. Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal. Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. Variation Law: If you change traffic lanes, the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now. Warm Water Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.   
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