WARNING! IT MAY TAKE A COUPLE OF READS TO GET THIS JOKE...



A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a bottle of his strongest stuff.

The bartender gives it to him and the guy drains the bottle in less than 10 seconds and doesn't bat an eye.

The bartender is impressed. He tell the guy, "Hey you look like you can handle yourself pretty well...I gotta proposition for ya."

The bartender then points to a huge jar of money. "How much money do you think is in there?"

"I don't know"

"There's over 5 grand in that jar. I got three tasks for you and if you complete all three, the money is yours"

"Ok"

"First...out back, I have a six-month old rottweiler that needs a tooth pulled. Second, tell that seven foot bouncer over there he's fired, and third, My wife is upstairs. She weighs over 700 lbs and hasn't been laid in 5 years. Do all three and you can have the money."

The guy asks for another drink and the bartender complies. The man goes out back and you hear a dog growling followed by a series of yelps. He comes back in and says, "OK that's one."

The guy goes to the front door and tells the bouncer, "Hey you!" The bouncer says, "Yeah little man?" The guy tells him, "You're fired!" and kicks him square in the balls.

The guy goes back to the bar and tells the bartender,"OK that's two down....now where's that 700 woman that needs a tooth pulled!"