Hi, I am new to Toronto, it's an exciting new city and I am glad to have the chance to start fresh here. However, I feel so alone. I know that I need this time for myself and to grow, but being here alone is killing me. I signed up to this site with the hopes of meeting some great people to share some experiences with. I have to say that leaving one life behind and to look forward to a new direction is hard. It has been about a month now that I left and arrived in TO and I am just tired of being alone with my thoughts. I want to be here alone away from all the distractions and begin a great adventure, its just not as fun as it is with someone else...I guess I got off topic about how do I start all over again...that still puzzles myself and I guess the process is truly what I need. So if you have any comments or just want to shoot the breeze that would be great. This is my first post and suppose it won't be my last. I am not sure about this online technique to meeting people but I will give it a shot...so you take care and I hope to hear from you!

Fresh starts can be a bit scary but if you just take it one step at a time, it can be very exciting and rewarding. I have visited Toronto. Is definitely a great city!. Good luck

First of all, don't beat yourself up over this. Chill. I am sure you are lonely. Big city, new city, trying to get your life going in the direction that you want. It's scary.

Coming here is a good step. Also, I am sure their are probably social clubs that you can use to meet people. Don't know if you hang out at pubs or bars, but you can talk to folks there. Church is always a good place to meet people (if you are into that). There are options. It will take some time, but soon you will be meeting people and having fun. Enjoy life. And best of luck to you.

Find a cause of your heart, get involved. Something that irks you? figure out how to fix it (within the community) or find people who are feeling the same and get started. Getting involved can be very distracting and a way to meet people. It's hard at firstbut you will be able to do things you kept putting off. The aloness will come and go...but it's a great time to meet yourself truley.

I'd like to thank-you for your responses. I just recently got out of a serious relationship. We were so in love and planned on getting married and become old with one another. Well, that did not work out, I could go on and on about why it did not but I will save you the boring read. I thought that my life was laid out for me and I was ready for the life long journey with this great inspiring woman, but now I have to change my life plans and begin again, alone. I moved to a new city to try to forget all about that part of me. A piece of me is forever gone. At the same time I lost myself somewhere along the way by putting our relationship first and by doing this I forgot who I was. I will never be able to forget, however I am able to forgive, learn and send positive vibrations out into this world directed towards us and hope and pray that we can just really evolve from our time spent together and still be able to truly smile at the simple things that go unnoticed in this world. I am excited about discovering myself again, and will try to tackle the many issues that reside inside. I know that we all have things that we wish were different, and if I can just fight for myself and keep a level head I think that everything will be fine. I do know that I did attract a great and beautiful woman into my life whom loved me very much, and if I am able to capture the attention of love once, then there is definitely something great about myself and that is a great start. So, I begin my journey to discovery and I hope that in the meantime I am able to carry all of the shattered pieces of my heart in both hands, because I do not want any of this to go to waste. I need this pain, this hurt. It is a signal to myself that there must be changes. So I hope to meet some kewl people along this trip and I promise to be fresh and inspiring along the way. If you have any ideas, advice or would like to grab a coffee or perhaps a beer or have similar stories that you would like to share, I'd love to hear them. Ok once again thank-you for your responses, I truly appreciate it and please keep them coming. I am always up for a great conversation.

My friend, A new start can be what you make it.You always have choices..You can meet new people any place, here, church,coffee cafes,Fitness clubs,the market, the list go's on.But making the choice of standards your looking for, to enrich your life as well as the ones you come in contact with.

Here is an opportunity to live your life however you want.
A chance to re-invent yourself.
Go do the things you like to do...even if its by yourself.
Go do something new, take a class at local college, or night school.
Live a life that is interesting.

Take a class in 'American Sign Language', very few men do that, its a class with a lot of women. Learn a bit of the language too, it opens the brain to different things.


Good Luck

Lots of Stoli

Being in a new place where you don't know anyone can be discomforting at first, but it should get easier with time. I say seize the day! Make each day as fun as possible. Start going out and doing things by your lonesome and maybe try things you've never tried before.....who knows, you might even find a new hobby you never thought you would before. I'm sure you'll eventually come across some interesting people and hopefully soon after a nice person to share your time with. Good luck!

i feel for you. i am currently starting all over, from a 14 year marriage. you will have your ups and downs with all the new changes. I too was scared...I just tell myself to not look back, focus on whats ahead and that i control my destiny. And remember you are your new best friend, treat yourself like one.
I am planning on moving to a new city as well. its scary, however a fresh start is also a new canvas to paint your life on..good luck

How true...how true! A fresh start is really a fresh start when you bring a new attitude to the new city. Stretch yourself...yeah, it might feel different at first...it might not seem like you, at first...but, my man...take action..shake up life up a bit (without getting crazy!). You'll amaze yourself...not to mention family and friends who have known you forever! Go for it!

I have a small suggestion, unrelated to your love life, just to your new-in-town life.

When in a new town, I've found that a fairly complete run through of the yellow pages (they got them in Canada, yes?) can give me a picture of the city faster than driving around.
Like I said, just a little thing, for getting to know new towns.

Oh, and a more practical suggestion, make yourself a plan, to jump start yourself. Schedule yourself to go to a series of places and events around town, both to keep yourself busy and enjoying yourself, and to give you the opportunity to be seen, and to see others.
Try something new to develop yourself...I hear that's like pruning a plant to make it grow. You challenge yourself, and it causes you to have energy to get going again.

Again, good luck.

A new start is only what YOU make it because you bring yourself wherever you go.

The best advice I can give is GET INVOLVED with the community (sports, volunteering, arts).

It's always darkest before the dawn

Smile, and try to think of something good that you have, that is your own, and focus on how bright the future could be

IF you do ever find that secret, please share it back with us,wink..

I am going on ten years out of a 16 year narriage,,,she cheated, I filed,,,our kids were just leaving home as young adults and at that TIME,,,,,I felt the most lost,,,as to have no-one left close to me to confide.....alone for the first time since my babies were little

So,,I went out and found someone new,,,it lasted about five years and was ALL bad and she suffered depression,,,so life was odd...
THAT was all my fault,,,as I felt the need to be with someone,,,,I SHOULD NOT have jumped into a long-term relationship then....

So as for your questions here,,,
a lady,,,,,should wait,,,,and you sir,,,should FIND,,,,
a safe past-time that you LOVE,,,,,,,?

I found THIS PLACE,,,,,,and THAT has worked for me,,,,,wink

Just look ABOVE here, at ALL the compassions flowing through earnest hearts to TRY,,,,just TRY,,and help you out..

I don't know about you man,,,,,
But,,,,,THATS SOME REALLY GOOD PEOPLE!!!!

Welcome here, and I think YOU will do fine as you have already openned your book of life,,and we in return,,,showed YOU our love..

Be you,,,and MINGLE,,,,,Friends here just happen,wink
And good luck,,,,here,and in life...
If ya need a ear anytime,,,write me..

Man did you start off in the right place!!! Minglers here have class out the wazzzoooooo!!! most of us in here have been through our own version of what your going through, Its hard thats true, but I believe if you read these threads youll notice at some point we ALL hada few things in common. find these character strenghts, focus on them and make them work for you. things like 1. All of us never quit cause were here looking and laughing again, 2. We now look ahead more than we glance back at what was(that one takes time)3. Everyone in here is genuinley good and believes in the power of laughter even if its through tears. Your in a good place my new friend, remember to breathe and take care of YOU.

Windwalker65

Well welcome to mingle

Mingle has been a nice place to be for me. Making friends and you do learn about people here. Play some of the games, reply to some of the forums, you'll feel welcomed here. I'm sorry you're going through the pain of love. The shattered pieces of your heart will one day be put back together one day by another kindred heart. It is easy to lose oneself in a relationship, we mustn't forget who we are, it's not easy. Getting out of a relationship we can begin to renew ourselves, heal and find peace within. I wish you the best and I think you will find the people on mingle great. Keep your chin up and give us a big smile and wave!! Again, welcome to mingle, the best place to hang around on the web

you just live day by day and keep a positive attitude

some people can't do that and can never get over a loss and start over

you see em in every bar sitting in the corner and drinking themselves to death

just dont do that and don't get on the "woe is me" trip and you'll be fine