I am forever 20.....

Your eye looks to be about 21!

I am a clever d1ck!

Yea, that's the way I see it. A curse for now but a blessing later in life. I guess I could pick up on younger chicks cept I have a seven year old boy. He'd blow my cover

eh, just say your his uncle

So yesterday I was with my son paying for the meal we had at a restaurant.


cashier gal- "Is this your son, er nephew, er...
me- "He's my son"
cashier- "But you look so young!"
me- "I'm twenty seven. How old do you think I look?"
cashier- "I'd say early twenties for sure. And how old are you little guy, five?"
my son- "Not even close"
cashier- "Six"
my son- "No, I'm seven"
cashier- "Well you look young too"
me- "Guess it's our family curse"



And then today as we were leaving church a bratty little nine year old girl decided to put in her two cents.

me- "Com'on buddy, we're leaving"
my son- "No, I'm still swinging"
girl- "Is that your brother?"
my son- "That's my Dad"
girl- "But he's too young to be your Dad"
me- "Guess the stork was confused when he left him on my doorstep. Actually, I'm twenty seven."
girl- "You're still too young. I thought you were a teenager"
me- "Nope, not anymore"



Don't you love it when people state the obvious.

Your eyes are blue. No ****

I used to work in a grocery store and you had to be at least 21 to handle the alcohol, that included bagging it. Most of the baggers were in their teens. So they'd call me over to bag the bottle, or just send the customer through my line. Anyway, this older couple came through and they bought some wine and I rang it up and was putting it in the bag because my little bagger couldn't touch it, and the lady said, "Sweetie, are you sure you're old enough to sell that?" And I was like, yep, "I'm old enough to drink it, too." I thought it was funny. I was like 24 or 25 back then, and no one believed it. I like looking younger, and when I'm older, I'll like it even more.