Hi, I am a 39 yr old female, that is currently separated from her husband for 8 yrs now, and is getting a divorce, well I have joined a choir and I met this guy that is also separated from his wife for 8 yrs now, well here goes, I like this guy so much, its like everytime we are at practice my face lights up, he has the most beautiful smile ever, he told me that he was interested in a relationship but that was as far as it went, so when he told me that I got so excited, now its being 8 months later and he's still not saying anything much about the relationship, recently we have shared our first kiss, and it was amazing, but there is a problem, is he a co-pastor and I don't wanna jepodise our relationship as friends, but I am falling in love with him, i don't mine how long it took for us to have our first kiss, but I would like to know what to do, cause all he is asking me is why I like him so much, I want a relationship with him, but am scared of how to say it or tell him how I feel, I get lost of words when ever he is around me, and my heart starts beating so fast, its as if am a school girl all over again...Help me please

Well if you are both serious about getting a divorce, do so and then pursue the relationship.

awww that is so sweet

Just tell him how you feel and let him know what you are afraid of and why.

If he truly wants a relationship with you he will understand. BE open and honest at all times with him.

Hi Stella,

Glad to see you have decided to move on in your life.
You have spent far to many years in idle. Perhaps it was for your son, but you must understand that there will come a time when he to will move forward, find a bride, have kids and lead his own life.

As for the feelings of falling in love with the co-pastor. Well, sounds like it might be all in YOUR head. Love is something that is recipricol. With that said, if he is asking why, he probably doesn't share the same scentimants you do. So be very careful, you might end up disapointed. Enfatuation can seem like love.

Love is a two way street, a comittment and mutual respect. If you are unsure about his feelings and or intentions, just be straight and ask him.

Hope this helped

Wow, i didn't see it that way, I guest it was all for my son, and i know some day he will have to leave to pursue his own destiny, and for my friend I hope its not all in my head, he does no that I am interested in him, and he knows just how he makes me feel when he is around, so why visit me if you know when ur are near me i feel this way, and i guest he asking me why i like him to fine out if am for real, am just sayin, but I will be very careful....

I appreciated what you have said.

Thanks

we all have scraficed for our kids, some more than others, you and your son have a right to be happy.

all i can say is take it slow, you sound, smart and sure of your self, just hesitant on getting hurt.(i know i cant spell)

i have faith you will do the right thing

lots of luck

No problem Stella.
Glad to of given you a change of view.

i do believe that if it is a serious freiendship that could lead to more that divorce is the first thing that shld be taken out first. because your past can always come back to haunt you, meaning your ex or his may still want to work the marriage out and that would complicate things more. just keep in mind your past can help you in your future.

What a well thought out post. I'm impressed!

I hope she gets her divorce and ends up with the new guy. Make sure those kisses don't lead to something else before you get your answer!