A question for everyone:

Okay, I think most of us would agree that it's prudent to use caution
when dating, particularly when dating via online.

But do you think the way to go about building trust with another person
is by lying about who you are in the first place, and then claiming you
did so because you were being cautious and that the other person had to
earn YOUR trust first?

A lie is a lie and is never right

sounds bogus to me

No,I would never support lying about anything. I also am not saying,
tell everything right upfront. I get asked questions that bring the
response of, " I will answer that at a later date. or I don't think you
need to know that, at this time."

Trust does take time to build & has different levels. A true
relationship requires the highest level of trust. Gwen knew all of my
skeletons & where they are buried. Only person that I have ever trusted
that much.

Hope this answered your question.

Nope if you expect to trust others they should be able to trust you in
return. Trust is a two way street. If your not being honest how can you
expect it from anyone else.

why Op has this happened to u?

Jean....
There should be no reason to lie about yourself period.. you are who you
are.
If the person gave false information in the begining and claims it was
cause of caution.. He/She just gave you something negative and now you
will have doubt about everything.
This could go back to the old saying, "A man is only as good as his
word"
If his words are lies in the begining... he's liar and how easy will the
next one come...(see.... there it is.... doubt!.. I don't even know the
person and I already have doubt about the next move)
I can totally understand caution and building trust.. but to build a
trust there first has to be HONESTY.. Omiting certain things is one
thing.. Lying is a whole differ ballgame.
JMO
~GEHC

Oh, I have my own answer to the question, allright. LOL. He's a lying
SOB.

Yes, of course it's happened to me, TT. I'd say that at LEAST 50 percent
of men I've dating or thought about dating or whom I've had a
relationship with have been caught in a lie.

*dated*

*hugs*

this wasnt the recent romantic one was it?
and btw how was that moonlit picnic?

Picnic was postponed..now it's cancelled.

He's the doctor I met. And ....while I do believe he's a doctor (because
he said certain things in detail that your average person would have no
clue about), he claimed to work at a certain place, for a certain
department. Well, what he didn't know was that my mother also works for
the same place, same department.

And I was describing him to her and she looked at the roster of
orthopaedic residents...and guess what? Ol, "I'm so hot because I'm a
DOCTOR that I have to lie about who I am lest women might stalk me," was
nowhere to be found.

So I confronted him with it -- not harshly and not right away, because I
was trying to give him the BOTD -- and guess what? In typical, "I did
something wrong, and boy is my face red, so I'll blame YOU instead," he
said, "You have issues and I hope you get help for them."

Uh....yeah.

no!!! sounds like an excuse to me!!

Lie is a lie is a lie. No excuses

sorry to hear that. jean

DAMN!
I'm sorry to hear that


and if he's blaming you.. then he's guilty of something else.. maybe he
is married... sad to think about.. but, it could verywell be an issue..

I cant see any reason for lying most of the time it will bite ya back
I try to be an open book all the time just turn to any page you want
and read away nothing to hide not saying that there arent things I
would not mind forgetting about but I wont hide them either if asked
about .

love the turn it around on you type!!!! ive had those before... evertime
i confronted my last bf about something he did that i didnt enjoy it
became "me" something i had done so we didnt have to discuss what he
did... ..

sorry that happened jean... but u deserve better than
that!

It don't make much sense to lie. Cause if they lie about one thing they
will finally have to lie to cover up that lie and so forth till there
whole life is one big lie. Sooner or later they always get caught. So
why not be honest from the start.