Topic: sympathy for alec | |
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As a future parent and someones offspring..
I'm curious to know..... How does it feel to be rejected by your children? Not like estranged...or like they truly hate you...I mean like those phases kids go through where they just really need space from their parents. Like Ireland ignoring her dad. |
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that's a good question, and i'm afraid i'm about to find out.
my eldest never went through those phases...i went all over the place with her and her friends as she cruised through her teen years with nary an argument, literally. my eleven-year-old...wow...even though she's SUCH a mama's girl, i can see her trying to break that already. she'll be a handful, and will think she has to break my heart to get her way. hopefully, she'll skate through those years as her sister did...and we'll remain close. the younger sisters, i don't predict ever pulling away. |
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It feels like crap but you get thru it.
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oh and if you mean the Ireland I think you do she should learn how not
to act fom both parents.Talk about childish. |
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I'm crossing my fingers for you lulu, i wish me and my mom were like
that, but now we get along. ARG my dad just told me yesterday how he gets through the week just to see me on saturdays! Now, this would totally make me feel special except for the fact that he knows that pretty soon I am moving across the country and after that will be my slow decline into a family life, so its actually kind of scary.... wait...i already posted this, I know, but after he just said that to me I think all reality just escaped him!!! *sigh* If you dont mind me asking you Lulu (or anybody who went through it) How was your um.."breaking off your parents" transition like? (god i hate being a daddys princess, it loses all charm in your child-bearing years!) |
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heh...i was a very difficult child starting at the age of twelve.
by difficult...um...*sighs*...let me state first...um...i am a completely changed person. i fought very hard to grow up, and grow up well, i might add. i was on crank at twelve, and sneaking out...and drinking and smoking...and running guns. mom is excellent, and it had nothing to do with her...i witnessed an act of violence and went a bit nuts for a while. by fourteen, i wasn't even recognizably human...had burnt out most of my emotions (i still find them a bit repressed, and others might tell you i am a bit cold and calculating, and highly analytical)...the closer my mother tried to get, the further i pushed her. i missed 67 days of school that year...i would go, and then leave. or never hit my first class. i remember sitting down to dinner with my mother, and staring off into space...when mom pulled my eyes to her and told me how much she loved and cared for me. i remember looking back, coldly, and very calmly telling her that she meant nothing to me, that she was a terrible mother, and that i would never forgive her. i didn't even flinch when the tears welled in her eyes... it wasn't long after that that my brother took me. my life consisted of school, and six hours of martial arts per day. that was the beginning of a total over-haul, physically and mentally. the person i really damaged was myself. my lies, deceit, and under-handed acts only served to push away anyone that would have been willing to help me. trust broken...well...takes a very long time to regain. even after having been clean for thirteen years, there are STILL people who will judge me based off of things i did when i was younger. most, however, have seen that i have grown into a highly ethical person who is VERY strict upon herself. |
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all you can do is let them know yer there
even if it bugs them been thru it |
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thanks for sharing lulu.
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I am adopting, as a single parent. I was matched with a fantastic girl
who lived with me for over a year. She was a special needs child. Her needs were so severe they had to lift the adoption order and place her in a facility to receive the immediate and consistent medical attention she required. In the time she was with me, every waking moment was her, to give her the life and home she was deserving of. Having severe fetal alcohol syndrome and mental health issues, she did not have the ability to process cause and affect and also had deep attachement issues. It can be heartbreaking, to love a child, want the best for them, and sometimes no matter how much you do, it doesn't make a difference. She certainly did go in and out of those "I hate you" phases, then love, then hate.... but I loved her no matter what. In many ways she was a typical child and behaving as such, while other times she was all over the map which is an emotional challenge in itself. I think most kids go through the testing stages, challenging and seeking their own identity. |
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@ the Op it sucks second time around for me.....
It also feels good . It is a double edge sword! |
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Sympathy for Alec? Why? It seems to me he got caught reprimanding his
daughter. He may have some issues with anger and may need to do something about it, however as I understand it his daughter was supposed to be available for scheduled phone calls. If she wasn't in the mood to talk to him then answer the Damn phone and tell him. As I see it Ireland his daughter should be sent to his Home for a period of time to learn respect. No matter what, a child should show this to a parent, and no excuse is allowed. It seems that Mom is a poor influence, and she should be held accountable for what occurred. The problem is California laws are so lenient in this regard that nothing will be done and Alec knows it. There comes a time when even a calm person gets tired of the BS, these attornies can literally destroy anything they wish with a so-called law or precident. His frustration from this entire fiasco will become more apparent as it goes on. Kim's attorney is counting on it, divorce in California is literally war when lots of money is involved. Sympathy? He should have moved the family from California before anyone filed for divorce. JMHO G |
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